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Pick up put down questions

(15 Posts)
saranga Sat 14-Nov-15 09:34:07

Hoping someone can give me some help with applying PUPD to us.
My boy, 4 months, usually naps twice daily in the pram while we are out and about. He goes and stays to sleep easily on it.
At about five he has a bf then naps on me for about half an hour. At6.30 we do our bedtime routine and 7-7.30 hr bf to sleep on me.

Is it OK to do Pupd just for his 5pm evening nap and his bedtime? Or does it need to be all sleeps? If it's all sleeps I'll be stuck indoors.

For his bedtime feed he usually spends a good ten minutes sleep sucking or comfort sucking. Should I be taking him off the boob when his main feed is finished but before he is fully asleep and putting him in his basket then?
He normally feeds again at about 9.30-10 (although this may be a response to being moves off my lap rather than hunger). If doing pupd he's still crying at 9.30 should o feed him?
Would o need to do pupd after all night feeds?

Queendedede Sat 14-Nov-15 19:35:01

Have you thought about shush pat? I found that much easier but sometimes did a combination of both, e.g if he was crying too much and patting wasn't helping I would pick him up to calm him then put him back down. It helped him settle quicker in his cot but never helped with reducing night time wakings though. The advantage was that when he did wake all it would take was bum patting to get him back to sleep as he was used to settling in his cot and didn't expect to be picked up.

saranga Sat 14-Nov-15 19:52:34

I understood that at 4 months you do shush Pat then picked them up, do I was going to do that
He hadn't responded to shush Pat in the past, so I have no idea how this will go.
I'm not so bothered about the night wakings, i know they will pass. I'm more bothered about him not settling in his Moses.
He's still feeding on me. Just fallen asleep on me.
A friend io fb made me feel really bad about sleep training at 4 months so now i feel guilty about doing it.

Queendedede Sat 14-Nov-15 20:15:31

I keep telling myself the night wakings will pass.... Still waiting at 19mo! It's worth trying the shush pat again, and I don't think it is sleep training as such, just sleep encouragement! My DS cried every bedtime until he was at least 8mo, that was with me sitting there holding his hand or patting him - I never left him crying on his own. I would refuse to pick him up though as I knew he was tired and just needed to sleep and as time went on he learnt that after being put to bed he wouldnt get picked up again but would always have someone come and comfort him in the cot if he cried. I would like to add that I was only strict about going to sleep in the cot at bedtime. For naps I still rock and put down once asleep and he does 2hrs usually. They do know the difference between naps and night sleep.

saranga Sat 14-Nov-15 20:33:16

Hw long are you meant to shush Pat for? He eokeup, we sjish oatted, then picked him up. He's now wailing like a banshee.

Queendedede Sat 14-Nov-15 20:53:49

Sometimes took 45 mins for him to settle back down

saranga Sat 14-Nov-15 21:00:05

He's still yelling. We are shush patting and picking up. He was when picked up then yells again when put down. He's due a feed at half nine. That will confuse things.

Queendedede Sat 14-Nov-15 21:12:59

Don't worry about confusing things by feeding, just do what you have to. To be honest, I think I was still walking around rocking mine to sleep during the night until 5mo but as I said, from about 3mo I started the shush pat and encouraging to fall asleep at bedtime as I felt this was the easiest and most ideal time.

saranga Sat 14-Nov-15 21:30:04

My boy goes to sleep on the boob but wakes up soon after going in the moses. It's hard. And new behaviour. He used to sleep inbetween feeds in the moses, now he wakes up and yells.

LibrariesGaveUsP0wer Sat 14-Nov-15 21:35:01

That's because he's four months. He's moving out of newborn behaviour.

Which bits are you finding hard and want to change- waking soon after going to bed in the evening?

Queendedede Sat 14-Nov-15 21:39:20

That is where our situations differ, mine was bf too but never fell asleep feeding, he was a very quick feeder and swallowed lots of air so had to wind him for ages after a feed. That's why we had to find other ways to get him sleeping, maybe why shush pat worked well for us. Sorry I'm not much help!

Reubix Sat 14-Nov-15 22:12:35

Following if you don't mind as we are going to start pupd in next few days ....

I'm also feeling guilty about it but my five month old is now almost hourly or two hourly through the night for a two minute feed and I'm going a bit mad as I can't sleep waiting for her to wake. Like the idea that pupd isn't sleep training, it's 'sleep encouragement'!

My big question is the same as yours - I do the school run at 9am and 3.30pm and she always falls asleep in the pushchair. How am I supposed to leave the house if she's not allowed to be pushed to sleep?!

Please do let me know if it works at all for you, I'm hoping three nights will do the trick and also going to make my husband do it as I'm too much of a wimp! Been told by health visitors to expect up to an hour of upset the first time I refuse to feed her to sleep which I'm sure will be worth it in the long run but which I can't bear the though of X

saranga Sun 15-Nov-15 00:37:00

Libraries - I'm not bothered about the 2 hourly wakungs, I know that's normal behaviour and though tough I'll ride it out.
What I want to change is where he sleeps and stays asleep. From birth I've bf him to sleep on me, and until last week has cluster fed all evening. This has until recently been fine.
Now during the day he is not feeding to sleep, also fine as he goes in his pram to sleep.
At night he falls asleep on the feeding pillow between 7 and7.30. I moved him to the moses basket and 20 mins later he wakes up. Last week When I put hm down after night feedd he would wake within 10 mins and cry. So we've been co sleeping and feeding lying down, which I am not happy with.

What I want is for him to learn that the moses means sleep. I need more freedom in the evenings and I need to be up for less than an hour at every night feed. I need to be able to put him down after a night feed and for him to be hdpoyvin the moses, because I can't function staying up all night tryi g to get him to settle.

Yesterday I think we had an hour of trying pupd bfore i put him back in the boob at 9.15 and he fed to sleep again. He's just woken up at 12.15 and I'm feeding g him again. This he is near sleep .

LibrariesGaveUsP0wer Sun 15-Nov-15 07:45:29

Where is the moses basket? Sadly by this age many stop being willing to sleep with light and background noise. If it's still in the living room this may be part of it . (I know , sids guidelines ....)

saranga Sun 15-Nov-15 09:16:34

Yeah it is still in the living room. We have all the lights off by 8 and the telly is on low. He doesn't wake if he's fallen asleep on the feeding pillow though, just if he's in the moses basket.

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