So, it's that "you think you've cracked it and then they change" thing again!
I was putting DD (3y4m) down before DS (17mo), but she has recently really been stretching out bedtime and I think she needs to go down a bit later and have a bit more 1:1 time with me at the end of the day. So I'm trying put DS down first.
But he doesn't settle well and I'm constantly up and down to him, sometimes having to go in and sit with him. He's always been like this. So I've been getting DD to play quietly with her dolls house in her room while I get him down, but if it takes a while she understandably gets bored and wants to join me. Tonight she ended up just sitting in silence with me while I sat with him - bless her she was pretty good, but it's pretty crappy for her!
I have a 5yr old and a 14month old. This is my routine:
6pm upstairs, run bath, get pjs etc all ready, brush teeth 6:30pm everyone out bath and dried, ds1 gets his pjs on while I sort out ds2. 6:45pm settle ds1 in my bed with books or TV while I give ds2 his bottle and sit with him until he falls asleep. 7:30pm (approximately depending how long ds2 took to settle). Ds1 bedtime story, kisses, bed.
At the moment this is working well for me. Ds1 likes TV time in my bed and is happy enough to watch his shows until I'm done with ds2. I know TV at bedtime isn't ideal but it's the only way I can manage two bedtimes until ds2 learns to put himself to sleep.
Thanks for your advice. I was putting DD down and putting on a story CD for her to listen to while I settled DS and then going on and kissing her goodnight. Sometimes she'd fall asleep while listening to it and other times she'd still be awake. But more recently she is always awake and then starts kicking off about going to sleep, which has made me feel that she needs to be going to bed later. It seems not very smooth to put her to bed to listen to a CD and the. Get her up again for stories etc. But that's a good idea that maybe she could do something in my bed which would give a natural change in location. The crucial thing for her seems to be that she has a good bit of "Mummy time" at the end of the day as she's been v insecure at bedtime since I went back to work.
DS naps either 10-11 or 11-12, so I don't think I could move that any earlier.
I have 4yo DS and a 22mo dd. I find it works well if I get them clean at roughly the same time - either stick them in the shower together or first give DD a wash and then DS. Then we all bundle into my bed for a story. Then I put DD to bed and come back, have a bit of cuddle and chat time with DS then put him to bed. He gets a bit of extra time and can read to himself in bed if he wants but their bedtime is only about half an hour apart.