Do babies ever grow out of breastfeeding at night and co-sleeping?(6 Posts)
I mean automatically, and if we do nothing?
I have an 11 months old who is relying on breastfeeding to go back to sleep when he wakes up at night and the second half of the night, since midnight onwards when he wakes, we co sleep just so I can get some rest for the next working day .
If I do nothing about this, will a day come that he just does not need cuddles and breast feeding to go back to sleep ? Or am i making a huge monster out of something that could potentially be resolved a bit easier at this age?
Weeeeeellllll it might help to teach him how to self settle at some point. It's your choice. I did at six months and everyone was much happier. I carried on BF until 14 months when DD naturally dropped the last feed. Still being woken with midnight visits from my 4yo insisting I shove over and let her in to the bed though.
My 3 have all been like this, and I did have to actively put a stop to it it didn't happen on it's own I think with dc1 & dc2 they were about 18 months and dc3 was a bit older probs nearly 2 each time I have been pregnant with the next so felt that I wanted to have myself back to myself a bit before I started all over again with a newborn!! I just went cold turkey gave them there last feed before we got up one morning then nothing after that, bottle offered at night but flatly refused and didn't feed them when they woke up in the night offered them water/(maybe bottle of milk can't remember) which they refused and cried for a bit a went back to sleep - repeat this a few times for a few nights and then they forgot about the feeding, still ended up co sleeping a lot of the time but gradually slept on there own all night ( by the time they were 3). Don't know what I'll do with dc4 although he quite likes his food (8 months) and seems to bf a lot less than the others did, so we'll see maybe he'll be the self weaner?!!
I had to teach ds4 to self settle when he went down at night when he was almost two, he still needs bf if he wakes in the night though and hes 2.6. He has autism so wouldn't understand if I tried to explain to him its time to stop.
So in my experiance it could take a long time to decide themselves (im still hoping he will)
My daughter is now three, and was always breastfed on demand. Until she was two, I used to feed her to sleep and put her down in her cot, then she would wake in the night at about 2 am, and I would feed her to sleep again, and she would spend the rest of the night with me. At two, she dropped her night feed on her own. She would still wake, but would get back to sleep with just a cuddle rather than needing to feed. This continued for another year or so, then a couple of months ago, just after she turned three, she stopped feeding to sleep altogether. I still cuddle her to sleep, and if she wakes in the night I cuddle her back to sleep, but in the main she sleeps from 7 pm to 6 am, and that just evolved naturally, without any sleep training whatsoever.
I got fed up of night feeding before my kids did, so night-weaned at around 2 and 2.5 respectively. But it's easier when they're older as you can just explain they can have milk in the morning and give them a cuddle. Haven't intervened in sleep other than that and they'd now sleep through anything - including being picked up and moved into their own beds if needed.
Cosleeping looks like they'll grow out of later, but I'm sure they won't be wanting to share when they're 15! That doesn't bother me so kind of leaving it to them. DS at 6 sometimes wants company mostly doesn't. DD still does at 3. They have their own rooms, it's sometimes a bit of a case of musical beds. If they both decide to cosleep they tend to be spread across the whole bed by the time I get to bed so then I go in DS' room by myself!
It's no big deal. Change things if and when it's too much for you.
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