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self indulgent moan re: non sleeping toddler

(9 Posts)
ClunkyBoobster Fri 24-Jul-15 04:32:29

my ds1 is 2 weeks away from 20 months old. he has not slept a stretch longer than 5 hours in his whole life. so well over 20 months since I had anything like a good nights sleep and I've just had enough.

I don't need advice because I know what I need to do, I just can't do it.

my dh isn't exactly supportive on the issue. I know a couple nights of daddy responding to night wakings with me in the other room may help but daddy won't/can't hack it. this isn't a dh bash really. he works incredibly hard and long hours so that I can be a sahm but I am feeling broken.

it is never a good time. I always have an excuse to wait: once we move. once we are settled. once he's over this cold. once we are back from holiday. once these teeth come through. I guess I'm worried I'd go through several nights of hell only to have it all undone when we go on holiday or he gets some more teeth.

I have no energy ever. all I crave is sugar, junk food and caffeine. I don't see when I could exercise but even if I could drag myself to the gym once the tot is in bed, I just don't have the energy.

I feel bitter and annoyed when people talk about their baby sleeping through. I feel bitter that no one has offered to have ds overnight. I feel bitter that sil/bil went on holiday for a week with fil and his wife and sil/bil were able to go out to a posh Italian wedding as their cherub sleeps wonderfully (7-7, 9 months old ff).

anyone else want to join me in my lack of sleep, self indulgent whinge?

broomy123 Fri 24-Jul-15 04:40:26

Bless you Clunky. You deserve a medal. Mine is 7 months and we're about to hit hour three of crying confused concerned about what will happen when I have to go back to work!she has loads of funny issues so there is nothing much I can do to stop it !
I know how you feel about other people whose kids sleep! I know one who 'can't cope' with her baby as he's too much hard work and only sleeps 7-5 hmm she gets loads of help and it winds me up!!! My DH doesn't cope at all with mine, but I'm lucky as mum has her if I'm desperate for sleep. Have you asked parents if they'll help? Are you BFing? It's so hard!!! Sending you a hug! X

broomy123 Fri 24-Jul-15 04:41:26

Tummy issues not funny! So tired can no longer make sense!!

broomy123 Fri 24-Jul-15 04:41:57

Tummy issues not funny! So tired can no longer make sense!!

ClunkyBoobster Fri 24-Jul-15 05:09:44

Hi broomy!

yes to breastfeeding. sort of surprised I made it through that moan without mentioning it actually. I'm not ready to wean but it is starting to make me feel done with it. I just can't imagine stopping as he is still so dependent on it.

and yes, a few mums in my birth group on Facebook complain about the 5am wake ups and I want to punch them.

ClunkyBoobster Fri 24-Jul-15 05:23:35

and absolutely no way I could work like this. I suppose that is something to be grateful for. although if I had to work maybe I would have more willpower to night wean in the hope that it would help the sleep.

CountlessScreamingArgonauts Fri 24-Jul-15 05:38:17

Yep, I share your pain! Lying here now with my 14 month old DD who has decided she will only sleep on me this week!
She slept beautifully for the first 5 months or so but since then rarely manages more than 2-3 hours at a stretch and likes to throw in a night of hourly waking every now and again just to show me how easy I have it really!
The junk food/caffeine/exhaustion spiral is really getting to me now, I loathe exercise but find myself starting to crave some time to do it but I haven't the energy or time. And my concentration is shot and after a very bad night I find even the simplest decisions virtually impossible.
But I can't bring myself to do anything drastic about it so I'll carry on trying to survive until she grows into better sleep habits......

ClunkyBoobster Fri 24-Jul-15 05:45:00

passes a giant vat of coffee to Countless

I honestly feel the same. I get really incredibly down about it. feel broken and on the verge of doing something drastic. then he surprises me with a good night (only 2 night wakings) and I feel rejuvenated.

if it was only ever 2 night wakings I feel like I could handle it. it's every hour and only going back to sleep with boob that drives me to the brink of insanity.

fhdl34 Fri 24-Jul-15 05:45:30

I'm being tortured too. 20 month old DS, starts night in his cot then in with us from first wake up. This week he has been ill all week so no cot at all. Yesterday he was finally getting better and went in his cot last night and stayed there till 3am - and has been awake ever since!
We are moving and I cannot wait to get in that house and get him in his own room. Once he settles in there I am nightweanibg him. I do feed lying down but I just can't sleep with him feeding mostly as he is an acrobat! I do take him off when I've had enough and try singing to him/leaving him with DH but he is a persistent little bugger today. Finally he has dropped off while I was typing this so going to try and extract book and get some sleep before DD wakes up.

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