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1 year old never slept through and waking 3 + times

(9 Posts)
goteam Sun 07-Jun-15 22:37:42

I wish it were a phase like many posts on here but 1 year old is a dreadful sleeper. Goes down at 7.30 by being rocked to sleep and if doesn't wake an hour later then wakes at around 9.30 / 10 and won't go back to sleep. I've spent an hour so far tonight trying to get bsby back to sleep and this is common. There will be a two hour period of being knackered but awake. Yesterday it was from 3-5. Then he slept until 6 which is remarkable as he usually wakes at 4 am for good.

I'm exhausted. I have a toddler, work and have some difficult family problems I'm dealing with. He can't seem to self settle and just stands in cot bawling if he isn't asleep when we put him down. He will wake every few hours in addition to this almost nightly two hour awake period. I don't have any ideas. I don't like to leave baby to cry and neighbours have mentioned his 'good set of lungs'.

I haven't slept for more than an hour in over a year and not for more than 4 hours a night in total. I can't see it improving.

queenofthepirates Sun 07-Jun-15 22:40:38

This book saved my sanity-you need to be tough for a few nights though www.amazon.co.uk/Good-Sleep-Guide-Your-Baby/dp/1903458358

goteam Sun 07-Jun-15 22:43:49

Thanks. I'll order that. Really worry that we've let bad sleep habits develop. Always feeding or rocking to sleep, going to him at the slightest murmur. We live in a block of flats so I worry about noise for neighbours.

Worth a go though.

heylottie Mon 08-Jun-15 16:47:44

Sympathies. My 15 month old has never woken less than three times a night, and is often awake and grumbling from about 5am. Some nights she is awake up to 6 times.
Like you I have another child and work! It is fucking agony, although in a weird way I am kind of used to it now (although I notice my face 'sits' in a weary, hang dog , grey way if that makes sense!)
I will look at that book too - I think dd's problems are mostly due to us sharing a room. I, too, tend to feed back to sleep due to her fury when she wakes if I ignore her, and I don't want to wake the street.
we are moving in a couple of months, and am hoping her own room will knock at least one of the night wakings out.
grim. sorry. am with you.

goteam Mon 08-Jun-15 19:17:59

Sorry you are in the same boat, heylottie. I was going to give up bf over the next month as have a weekend work conference next month but actually thinking of continuing and just expressing to maintain supply while there. I just don't think we could ever get him back to sleep without feeding. Uh. It's just exhausting. I'm late with a few work projects and just not on the ball.

We are right now trying to get DS to self settle by leaving hm in cot and returning every 5 mins. I hate leaving him to cry but at wits end. Toddler as sleeping through by this age and we could put her down sleepy but not asleep and she would drop off.

goteam Mon 08-Jun-15 19:19:12

Own room should help. Our little one was basically awake all night when we room shared do things have improved a bit!

goteam Tue 09-Jun-15 09:22:45

Just to update. We tried what I think is called controlled crying last night. Put baby down at 7.15 after feed and when sleepy. Obviously cried as we usually rock him to sleep. Went back after 5 mins. Cuddled and rocked a bit and put down when calm. Cried again. Repeated at 7 and ten minutes and he dropped off when put down almost asleep the last time. Whole process took 40 mins but he slept from 8 until 5, fed then slept for almost an other hour in our bed. This is an absolute first. We had never given him the opportunity to self settle as I have always gone to him at the slightest murmur. He is usually kranky and exhausted in the morning and ready for a nap by 8. He is going strong and probably won't need a nap for at least an hour.

We will be doing the same tonight and hoping it wasn't a fluke!

heylottie Tue 09-Jun-15 09:52:00

That's brilliant! I hope you managed to sleep too, rather than laying awake waiting for him to grumble
I do think controlled crying works - consistency is key I think, I did it for dd1 at some point - she got better after two days, whoop I've cracked it I thought, then she regressed for a couple of days, and then she slept through
For dd2 I cant really do anything like this - dd1 had her own room and I think it would be too hard for dd2 whilst she is still sleeping in a cot half a foot from my bed. Roll on the house move!

goteam Tue 09-Jun-15 17:42:22

Yes, I was awake from 4 as that's when I'm used to getting up for DS but at least I wasnt woken through the night!

Fingers crossed your house move solves sleep problems for your little one.

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