If baby hates Moses basket

[BreeVDKamp]

Is he likely to hate one of those cribs that attach to the side of the bed too?

My baby is only 5 days old, so obviously everything is changing all the time and no day has ever been the same yet, but one thing that is always the same is that he has never settled in the Moses basket despite us persevering. We have tried raising the head end in case he didn't like being completely flat, and tried putting him down both awake and fast asleep.

We stayed 2 full, long days and 1 night in hospital and he was absolutely fine in their cribs so I wonder if the Moses basket is too soft or something. Although he doesn't like being in the pram's carrycot either.

So far he has only slept either in car seat for a couple of hours, or on one of us, but then we have to stay awake. It's been fine so far but I don't want to do either of those options long term, and would like to sleep when he sleeps.

He was delivered my emergency forceps so I'm worried maybe being flat gives him a headache! So am looking in to cranial oateopathy but is that overkill at such an early stage??

[TarkaTheOtter]

I had one like this. He did eventually go in the Moses basket but it took weeks not days. Even now at 1.5 when ill he wants to sleep on us not next to us. I don't think a cosleeper cot would have made a difference.
He is generally quite a good sleeper (once we were through the first few months) though.

[Cass168]

If he likes sleeping in the car seat and on you, maybe he likes feeling cosy and the basket feels like a wide open space to him. When my ds was very small I used rolled up blankets around the side of the Moses basket to make him feel more secure.
Can't offer any advice on lying flat, sorry. Sounds like you had a rough delivery, hope you're doing ok too

[donkir]

Have you tried swaddling? He's only 5 days old so the place he feels most secure is sleeping on you as hard as it is especially if you a ftm. It does get better. I used to have to wrap my ds in a blanket so he'd still feel I was holding him. He's now 4 months old and sleeps happily in his cot in his own room.

[FATEdestiny]

I would put baby straight into a full sized bedside cot. Take one side off a full sized cot and butt up to your bed. Allows for plenty of space for baby and easy for you to settle baby while lying down.

Daytime naps - have you tried swaddling?

[PterodactylTeaParty]

Mine hated the Moses basket, slept not too horrifically in a little crib with barred sides pressed right up against the bed, and slept best of all in a 3-sided cot attached to the bed. It made a huge difference for naps especially, where she wouldn't settle unless she was touching me. We didn't buy one until she was three months but I wish we'd folded and got it sooner - it is one of the best baby things we bought.

[PenguinPoser]

My 11 week dd has never slept in the bedside crib yet. It's normal for them to want to be close to you and held. It's very tiring though. Now she's fine sleeping in carrycot we are going to try the crib again soon. Try swaddle and my hv suggested rolled up cellular blanket around head so they feel more enclosed. It will get better!

[BreeVDKamp]

Ok thank you everybody :)

So it is normal to hold the baby while he sleeps? I can't believe I never realised that hah. I will have to find ways to stay awake, it is soooo difficult! Wow!

He does look minute in his Moses basket so perhaps we will try again in a couple of weeks and he will like it :) will also try the rolled up blanket around the edges.

We've tried swaddling a few times but he always manages to free his arms. Will keep trying though anyway as he looks so cute and delicious like a burrito.

Thanks for the tips

[Christelle2207]

Mine was the same but we persevered with putting him in between rolled up blankets etc. and he eventually got the hang of it....sometimes.
I don't think it is normal to hold your baby all night long.
I do think it's normal to co-sleep with your baby in the early weeks because otherwise you won't get any rest at all which actually is dangerous. I'm not going to recommend that you do it, but will say that it's worth looking into how to do it safely.
I co-slept a lot when my ds was very small but at 3 months he was mostly in his cot.

[TaurielTest]

If your baby wants to be held to sleep (I had two like that!) can I recommend a stretchy wrap like Moby or HanaBaby? He can sleep wrapped up next to your body and you can sit, stand, move around, do stuff... I could not have survived the early months without one. Look for a local sling meet or sling library to try one out :)

mobywrap.com/pages/instructions-the-moby-wrap
ukslinglibraries.wordpress.com/find-a-sling-library-near-you/

[TaurielTest]

PS You cannot sleep with baby wrapped to you though.
Safe, planned co-sleeping was what worked for us during the night.

Don't give too much weight to how your baby slept in those first couple of days in hospital - I believe it's usual for babies to sleep a lot immediately after the exertion of being born, then get more lively when you take them home...

[thewholedamntown]

My little girl HATED the Moses basket from the minute we brought her home. We ended up getting a sleepyhead which we placed in the normal cot with the side down and scooched up next to the bed. It was a complete insanity saver!

[thewholedamntown]

Oh and a sling for during the day so I could do simple things like make a cup of tea, etc.

[BreeVDKamp]

Yes I've got a stretchy wrap sling thing, was just testing it out just now!

I did look into sleepyheads and poddle pods but not sure they're meant for overnight use.

Maybe I will look into co-sleeping. I've not really researched it as didn't want to try it but maybe we will.

[gingerbreadmam]

havent read full thread but have you looked at the sleepyhead? apparently good for babies who dont sleep well on there own.

[Oly4]

Neither of mine liked the moSes basket. It is normal to hold newborns day and night for the first few weeks, though bloody exhausting!! I found mine were much better on the bedside crib but, even then, in the early days they would sleep for an hour at the most and then be up again. It is normal and I promise it will settle down. Tricks that help are laying on the mattress/sheets yourself so they take on your smell
And warmth and then gingerly placing baby onto said mattress while keeping hand on baby for a while. You somehow have to try and trick the little monkeys into thinking you sleep in their crib/Moses basket too. We even used to warm up one mattress with a hot water bottle... Though that was in winter. It all sounds mad but it will get easier. I promise!! Personally I loved my Troll bedside crib from john lewis as it made breastfeeding very easy and I was too tired to be sure I could co-sleep safely. Good luck!

[MrsCorr]

I'm thinking that the reason he slept well in the hospital is that the cot is clear so he could see what was going on around him if he woke up. My son hated his Moses basket for this reason so we moved him into a crib so he can see me & he's slept all night ever since

[BreeVDKamp]

Thought I'd come back to update!

Last night DS slept in his Moses basket all night (12-5, waking in between of course)!!! So happy :)

Friday night, after I'd posted, I did end up holding him all night while he slept, but he was calm and settled so I was grateful for that. I'd realised he's never been in the pitch black since being in the womb, and maybe that would help (duh!), so I was sat there in the pitch black holding him while he slept, but he did seem to like the dark.

Went to the postnatal clinic yesterday morning and midwife said not to hold him all night, it's utterly impractical and he'll still be needing us to in years to come, so to nip that in the bud!

So last night, due to a combination of rolled up blanket to make Moses basket smaller, music, pitch black, t-shirt lining the mattress, rocking him to sleep and bundling him up, I manage to transfer him into the Moses basket smoothly and he slept great! And so did I! So happy, hopefully we can keep it up. He is napping in the basket now.

Yay! Thanks for the tips :)

[5YearsTime]

My LO is 2 months and has slept really well in her bedside crib since very early on. However, I know she does look for me or DH whilst she's settling down to sleep so whoever puts her down lies down beside her on the bed (her crib is a co-sleeper). This is usually only for 2 mins now whilst she has a wee look around and then goes to sleep.

At the beginning we did use a rolled up blanket to make the space smaller but she hasn't needed that since about 1 month.

Swaddling works for us but if he's getting his arms out you are doing it wrong! This happened to us when we tried to use the swaddle cloth as a rectangle. Now I fold it diagonally so it's longer and swaddle like that. Friends have used Velcro swaddled with success, we've got a zip swaddle that's a pain in the bum though and don't use it.

[Cass168]

Ah, glad to hear you had a better night :-)
I'd forgotton about the tshirt thing, even though I used to put my worn nighties in my lo's Moses basket for the same reason!

[FinalFatmester]

Glad he's sleeping better! I was going to suggest the swaddling, blankets and tshirt too! Another thing is we used to put a hot water bottle in when she wasn't in there (and obv remove when she was) as it wasn't so noticeable that she was going from a nice warm cuddle into a cold moses basket.

[BreeVDKamp]

Last night was ok too. We gave him a dummy to help him drop off as otherwise he would constantly smack his lips even though he is stuffed full and wouldn't latch on. Feel pretty bad about that! Will keep trying to settle him without the dummy, but for the last few days we have been pacifying him with a finger which is surely just as bad. He is a week today :(

[BreeVDKamp]

Final we tried the hot water bottle last night too! Think I left it in too long though as the Moses basket was really really warm... Will try again!

[FATEdestiny]

Do NOT feel bad about giving a dummy.

I hate the way dummies are demonised among first time parents. It is no coincidence that much larger proportions of second and third time babies have a dummy from birth, compared to first time babies.

FTM feel there is something terrible about giving baby something comforting to suck to get to sleep. When sucking to sleep is natural, normal and the easiest of all the settling methods.

By the time parents get to subsequent children, they are more likely to understand the huge benefit of establishing a dummy and be far less susceptible to the First-Time-Parent striving for perfection and guilt and not being perfect.

Dummies are amazing

The dummy allows baby to go to sleep without crying or distress.

The dummy allows baby to go to sleep independently and so learn to sleep without the need for a parent getting them to sleep.

The first 12 weeks of baby's life are in fact the easiest for getting baby to sleep, especially the first 6 weeks. Mostly as long as baby has a full tummy and feels secure, sleep is easy to come by. It gets much harder after 3 months when baby needs sleep triggers to get to school. The dummy is great for establishing a sleep trigger ready for when older.

Do NOT feel guilty about giving your baby a dummy for comfort