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Help! Sleep deprived, Can't decide what to do!

(3 Posts)
monkey2014 Wed 27-May-15 12:18:47

7 week old son was very regular 2.5 to 3 hr sleeper up until 5 weeks when it's all become unpredictable and a bit stressful because I'm so tired. I find getting up in the night fine but at the moment the situation is I'm getting about 2 hours sleep a day sad I'd love to know if you think these things sound normal or if I'm doing something wrong. In the wee hours I feel awful like in doing something to upset hi or I'm not helping him sleep properly. Husband thinks it's just how it is and I shouldn't blame myself but Im finding it hard to see him upset and wonder if it might be my fault. Can you see anything I am doing wrong?

At 5 weeks he started being a light sleeper in the mornings in his Moses basket. Typical night since then has been good sleep from 7 or 8 for 2-3 hours, then shorter sleep of 1.5 - 2 hrs and again until approx 4-5am, then after that anything from 15 mins to 1 hr in the cot. I end up holding him and he is out like a light on a person. Is that normal? The easy waking but has gradually got earlier and earlier so a couple of nights ago hit started at 12 or1.

However last night he didn't have the good sleep at thebeginnng at all. It was all broken up so he never lasted more than 25 mins in cot before waking again. This went on between 8 and 1 at which point he started getting very upset and it took till 330 to get him to sleep again. I felt terrible sad I held him for one hour and then put him in cot and he slept for one more hour. Then he woke at 530 fed and I held him until he woke at 845n as I don't want him to be sleep deprived as well!

This has carried on this morning. I was careful to make sure he is only up for an hour or so when he starts to get tired and he fell asleep again at 10, but since then he's woken up twice. I've tried putting him down in the pram so I can sleep by he wakes after 20 mins. I'm now holding him again to make sure he does get a proper nap. We have similar problem in day now where he'll sleep in sling or on person but won't last long on anything flat.

He feeds to sleep mostly, or sometimes feeds and then rocks the rest of the way. He's not unhappy or crying in his cot, just easily woken. He's asleep when I put him down. I hold him upright for a bit after feed anyway but am watching to make sure he's properly asleep/floppy before I put him down. For medical reasons I. Can't cosleep. At night he's in Moses basket inside crib. He feeds very well, bf, no problems there.

Part of me (most of me) thinks it's just a phase and I just have to learn to cope better with being tired, but the rest of me thinks I have ruined his sleep and am causing him sleep deprivation sad what do you think?

FATEdestiny Wed 27-May-15 13:21:42

Have you tried a swaddle? Lots of newborn babies like a swaddle because it replicates the secure tight feeling of being held in your arms. It also dulls the startle reflex and generally dulls responses so that it is easier to put a sleeping baby down without waking him.

I have also never got on with moses baskets. I use a full sized cot with one side removed butted up to my bed for nighttimes (sometimes called a bedside or sidecar cot). This is like co-sleeping but for those (like me and you) who don't want to co-sleep and see value in baby sleeping in his own space. It means that at night I can reach over to baby and place a hand on the chest to reassure, and re-insert dummy as required.

For daytime sleeps I swear by the bouncy chair for easy foot bouncing to sleep. There are some safety issues with this. Not leaving baby unattended, not for used extended periods of time (ie just naps, not all the time) and stop using once baby is sitting (about 6 months old).

The bouncy chair means you can sit on the sofa hands-free bouncing baby to sleep and also give some little extra gentle bounces if baby should stir to get him back to sleep.

I also absolutely swear by the massive value of a dummy to allow a baby to comfort suck independently - so that they can get to sleep without an adults help. Do not believe the hype about evil dummies. not true.

So aside from the staples of dummy, swaddle, bedside cot and bouncy chair - most other sleep issues this age come down to feeding. If you have feeding sorted, sleep comes easy.

So I would recommend feeding more frequently than you expect. I would feed not longer that two hourly through the daytime (unless a feed was requested sooner, which is fine). Frequent daytime feeds means baby gets most of their calorific needs through daylight hours, meaning fewer feed in the night.

Good luck!

monkey2014 Wed 27-May-15 13:40:16

Would you wake him up to feed two hourly? That's not a problem at the moment obviously!

We did swaddle early on but he doesn't like his arms in - it woke him up trying to flail about. He does startle but doesn't wake up from it. We tuck the blankets in under his shoulders instead.

We do have a bouncy chair which I've been trying to use no more than once a day for sleeping. The problem is definitely staying asleep rather than getting to sleep so the bouncing does help,

The Moses basket is in the crib right next to me so I can easily reach him. Do you think maybe he just doesn't like it in there anymore?

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