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Have I made my 11-month-old baby too dependent on me to sleep?

2 replies

Nickname1980 · 05/01/2015 08:27

Up until a few weeks ago, my baby was breastfed to sleep and took most of his naps sleeping on me (either that, or in the buggy). Almost never napping in his cot.

I have just stopped feeding him to sleep and he only has one nap a day, but in the buggy.

At night, my husband rocks him to sleep and he goes down in his own bedroom. He'll wake every hour or so until I go to bed, and then take him up to the cot next to me in my room.

Then he'll usually end up in bed with me at some point during the night.

What worries me is that I've made him too dependent on my husband or I to (or the buggy) go to sleep. He starts with a childminder for a few days a week in 6 weeks (when he'll be one) and I hate the thought of him struggling to sleep when he's there. I don't know what to do!

Everyone says I should sleep-train him (cry it out) but I don't much want to unless I really have to. Anyone go through anything similar? Anyone got any advice?

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TeaPleaseBob · 08/01/2015 21:51

I feed my daughter to sleep or very drowsy even now at 19 months. She was the same when younger and didn't want to nap in the cot, loved being held or in pram. I went back to work when she was 13 months and she settles well for my DH and my mum for naps and bedtime. I'm away all day so she doesn't see me on work days. It took a few weeks for her to really get in swing of things but she was never very upset just needed extra cuddles.

We still sit with her until she falls asleep (I know, rod for back etc...) so mum does that too if she's putting her down.

The childminder will be used to babies having to settle in. Babies and children are more flexible than we sometimes think and lo will get used to childminders routine I'm sure. If all else fails a walk in the pram should settle lo.

Personally sleep training never appealed to me but each to their own. My lo now sleeps 12 hours at night (unless teething/ unwell) and 1.5-2 hours nap midday.

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Nickname1980 · 08/01/2015 23:01

Thank you, TeaPleaseBob, that is so reassuring! It makes me feel a lot better to know you're going through something similar and your daughter is fine when you're at work.

I don't mind the cuddles to sleep - it's just the thought of him struggling without that when I'm not there that worries me (not gonna lie, a 12-hr stretch at night would also be amazing...).

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