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Missing the window of (sleep) opportunity?

(12 Posts)
flipflopsonfifthavenue Wed 31-Dec-14 12:35:52

To cut boring story short I think DS2 is getting overtired making falling asleep for naps and at bedtime a battle always ending in screaming meltdowns (mostly his but I've been there too hmm)

How long does your 7wk old go between naps?

What are their sleep cues?

DS1 is 2.5yo so I remember nothing about how long he was awake for at this age. I certainly remember spending every waking hour making sure he didn't get overtired though. Something that I can't do for poor old DS2 because, well, I've got DS1...

Help me avoid 2-hr long bedtimes and turn him into a happier baby. Feel I'm letting him down sad

FATEdestiny Wed 31-Dec-14 14:34:01

My DD is 13 weeks now. At 7 weeks I basically worked under the assumption that if baby was not being fed then I would be working on getting her to sleep. She wouldn't have gone more than half an hour after her feed awake.

At 13 (nearly 14) weeks now, she is awake and happy for 30-60 minutes at a time and goes no longer than 90 minutes awake before I'm working on getting her to sleep.

imisssleepandwine Wed 31-Dec-14 22:47:19

I agree with FATEDestiny. at 7 weeks I'd feed, change and chat at the same time then try to get back to sleep. this always worked really well with DD.

Its harder with DS, he is 15 weeks now and always cries before naps. We try to start the "got to sleep" process at the first sign or tiredness. I watch for eye rubbing, lack of interest in toys, not many smiles, shouts, glazed eyes, spitting out dummy.

imisssleepandwine Wed 31-Dec-14 22:48:20

forgot to add it still takes me up to 30 minutes to settle

flipflopsonfifthavenue Thu 01-Jan-15 08:27:02

How do people keep up with this cache duke when it's their second child? I've tried just "popping him in the sling" but he's there now, screaming in my face. He's now been awake 1.5hrs and I've been trying for over half an hour.

I think I've missed it again today sad

flipflopsonfifthavenue Thu 01-Jan-15 08:27:20

Cache duke?? Schedule!!

thinkingaboutthis Thu 01-Jan-15 08:35:55

Will he feed to sleep? At that age if one of mine had been awake 90 minutes they'd have needed another feed anyway.

FATEdestiny Thu 01-Jan-15 08:40:31

Flipflop - DD is my fourth child - I also have a DD10, DS9 and DS5 off school for the Christmas holidays at the moment. Granted no toddler at the moment, but I've done baby with toddler before.

Having an asleep baby is much easier than having a screaming baby!

I used the bouncy chair to get her to sleep at 7 weeks. That way you can park yourself on the sofa and have hands free for dealing with toddler (bounce the bouncy chair using your foot).

I've never been a fan of slings, I prefer to keep my personal space as my own most of the time. Thant's just me though.

thinkingaboutthis Thu 01-Jan-15 08:43:20

Do you have a swing? I had a fisher price one and would put the baby in it on the highest setting with a dummy and white noise. I go for as many sleep cues/props as possible - noise, movement, sucking, comfort blanket/muslin/toy.

flipflopsonfifthavenue Thu 01-Jan-15 09:10:44

I think I just need to start sooner getting him back to sleep. This is a baby who slept almost continuously for first three weeks of life so it's not that he just needs less sleep suddenly, am pretty sure we're in a vicious overtiredness cycle.

He will feed to sleep when he wakes at night but otherwise he'll drift off on boob but wake few mins later.

He's such an alert baby that I think being in a bouncy chair (which we have) or a swing would just leave him buzzing with awakeness. Likewise not sure how I could stop DS1 putting his face in his if I was trying to get him to sleep where we were hanging out.

I don't mean to poo-poo all your suggestions, I clearly haven't worked out what works for him yet and there are still lots of things I can try. Thing is I just feel so bad for him and that I'm not caring for him properly. I feel I'm missing out on DS1 who spends most of his time with DP while I spend all day with DS2 trying to get him to sleep sad

Guess there is a certain amount of me not having adjusted yet to life with a newborn, having been used to a 2yo. Had forgotten how constant the care is and I suppose I need to accept that again. All this "just stick to your normal toddler routine and baby will have to come along" when really DP and I are like two single parents sharing a house.

Gone a bit off topic, sorry...!!

Iggly Thu 01-Jan-15 09:46:56

My second lived in the sling for the first 3-4 months when I had a two year old as well. Made life easier all around.

She also got tired for bedtime at 6pm which was hard at first but I would avoid long evenings of screaming (although I'd end up going to bed at a similar time as was very tired - this was for a few weeks until she started going down properly then I could grab a quick evening)

FATEdestiny Thu 01-Jan-15 11:52:24

That does sound like a vicious overtiredness cycle. Just do whatever you can to get him to sleep, don't worry about anything else just getting him to sleep and feed well.

That in itself will give you more time to spend with your toddler, when baby is sleeping.

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