To those who've done CC(36 Posts)
What led you to do it, how did you get through it and most importantly, did it work?
I tried it a few months ago with dd (now 1) but only left her for a maximum of 3 minutes. I did it as I was so sleep deprived and just wanted her to learn to self settle. Looking back I am not sure I did the right thing as it only seemed to work short term and her sleep is now worse than ever. I really want to start some kind of sleep training tonight as I return to work in 2 weeks but not sure which direction to take only know that we can't carry on the way we are.
Sorry I waffled on a bit there, I have been following some of your threads and see you've had quite a tough time of it and can really relate as dd has been similar.
I spoke to a sleep specialist three nights ago (who was brilliant) and after a 2 hour phone consultation my DS's sleep training begins a week today. I've got the next week to put small changes into DS's daily routine and to take a new approach to his bedtime routine (following telephone discussion) and then the actual training will begin. I go back to work in seven weeks and things HAVE to change.
The specialist spoke to me about a range of sleep training techniques, about four or five, but I've decided to go for CC.
I'm happy with my decision but am worried about the reality if doing it.
it worked for us, but the first night wasn't easy. I just posted on another thread about my ds , I did not have a decent night's sleep in 8 months and neither did he. It was affecting the whole family.
Me and DP decided we would support each other. The first night I was crying along with the baby! Ds cried on and off for 45 mins in total. But when I say cry, it wasn't heart rendering sobs (like mine!), no tears , just shouting angrily lol where he was used to me running in after 3 seconds ! (looking back I guess that's where I went wrong ...? )
That night he went right through to 3am - never done that before
the second night 15 mins shouting, slept through
third night 5 mins shouting , slept through
That was 2 months ago
now we have a baby that sleeps 7pm - 6am and his day time naps are a lot better too.
we have had the odd couple of nights where he has regressed but this has been down to him having a cold .
every baby is different and as Fairy pointed out it doesn't work for all. It worked for us - so far - but you know it can all change ! arrghhhh
I did it. DD was around 18months, and I started with her day time nap.
I did it because she woke every 45 minutes during the night and it was killing me.
I followed Jo Frost's method. It took a while at the first nap, but there wasn't any crying at bedtime.
Oh, when I say crying - I mean angry, DD was very angry.
Numerous people have told me to conquer the nights first before attempting the naps??
I was thinking of using CC with naps AND bedtimes right from the offset or is this expecting too much?
Message withdrawn at poster's request.
I can only go off DD, but starting with the nap worked for us. That night as I was zipping up her sleeping bag she closed her eyes and that was that. DH kept looking at me for weeks after saying "I can't believe that she's not waking in the night!".
DD was definitely ready for it, she must have been shattered too. It was difficult starting with the nap though, because I had no support, but to be honest I was reaching the end of my rope.
How old is your son?
DD was 10 months old. Waking several times a night, sometimes for hours. She was my first and I was determined to be an attachment parent so hated even thinking about cc. It was the best thing I could have done.
We did a gentle firm of it. 1 min, then 2, then 3. Stopwatch was reset if she was quiet for a minute or two iyswim. It worked very quickly actually. Done in 3 nights, and it really wasn't that hard. Thing I found hardest was to leave the room fairly quickly, whether she was resettled or not.
It was a lifesaver for me, and DD was so much happier afterwards as well. I think she was sleep deprived-i thought she was a really grumpy baby, but she chilled out a lot once she was getting 12 hours sleep a night. I haven't looked back.
He's coming up 9 months. My main issue is that he will not sleep unless he is feeding, both at bedtime and for daytime naps. When I feed him to sleep for his naps I have to sit there with him in my arms until he wakes up because as soon as I move he wakes up - it's just ridiculous. Some nights he can go 9-10 hours straight but other nights he's up every two hours. Sone nights he's back to sleep after a quick feed but other nights he can wake up at some silly hour in the morning and be awake for 2+ hours. I find myself constantly feeding him back to sleep because of how tired I am and most nights I end up bringing him into bed with me out of desperation.
itmustbebedtime - that's really reassuring, I'm glad you had a good outcome!! When you went in to do the checks did you speak to your DD and did you wait until she had settled a little before walking back out?
I understand, I fed DD to sleep too. We bed shared for 15 months too so it was too easy to roll over and whack a boob out every time she stirred. DD was a bit older so maybe that's why it only took one session of CC.
I'm starting it next weekend as my DH is off work for just over two weeks so I will have someone to share the workload and stress with. I'm not sure I could cope mentally and emotionally if it was just me on my own
I did it because I was so tired that I had absolutely no patience left.
I stuck it out as I was desperate.
It took less than a week.
I did because I was going back to work and wanted a full night sleep after 10 months.
We went from cosleeping to him asleep in his cot from 7-7 in two weeks.
I always spoke to her, soothed her, picked her up (briefly) and none of this avoiding eye contact stuff. But she didn't really calm down when I was in the room. She was pretty cross tbh! So, when I left the room, she would be as scream-y as when I went in. To my mind, the point was to let her know I was there looking after her. But she needed to calm down and settle on her own ( and I would never have believed she would, but she did!).
I'm sure whatever decision you make will be the right one and you will all be happy to be getting more sleep. I'm going to do the gentle cc that another poster mentioned on your thread so leaving for 1, 2 then 3 minutes. Hoping that as long as I'm consistent it will work this time.
My 11 month old had become a nightmare at night. From day one she was a textbook baby, slept fantastically, went down no problem etc etc then at 7 months teeth and a terrible cold came into the equation and things were never quite the same. I spent the last 2 months with her being very difficult to get down to bed (sometimes it took hours) and then she would wake twice in the night, come in our bed the first time and would take an hour of struggle to get her back to sleep each time. Was an absolute nightmare. So on Monday I started CC and I'm kicking myself for not doing it sooner. The first night she woke once and it took an hour to get her to sleep, the second she slept through, 3rd night woke once and took ten mins to get sleep and last night slept through. But what I've also noticed is that my little girl is now eager to be in her cot at bed time and tonight for the first time since she was born she went to bed awake and went to sleep all by herself. I never left her to cry for long, 5 minutes max and I went straight in if she started to cough or gag etc. First night I had to hold her twice but as soon as she was calm I put her straight back. I think it's more about teaching them that once they're in the cot, they're staying in the cot till morning x
We used a sleep consultant for our then 7 month old (now 10 months) it saved my sanity. She would only feed to sleep and wake every 1-2 hours and have 30 min naps. The main advice was no night feeds at all. I was confident she wasn't hungry as she was steadily putting on weight and eating solids. Feed, book, into cot. First & second night stay next to them until they fall asleep. Third night stay in room but no stroking/patting. Fourth night onwards in/out every 2 - 3 mins. It's important that you do the sleep training for the first 4 nights as you are the sleep association. Then we alternated from night 5 onwards. We tackled the nights first and by day 3 she was sleeping 6-7 hours and after 2 weeks 11 hours. She wakes early 5.30 onwards but I can live with this for now! Naps were given in sling/buggy initially to ensure she wasn't over tired. Within 1 month she napped in the cot twice a day for 1.5 hours each time. Do it! It will change your life!
I used cc with my DS now age 12. He was 6 months. We moved into our own house and after a week to settle in I used cc. Within 3 nights he slept through. I didn't do any of the going back in to his room. He was crying because he was cross with me. If he was crying then he was ok. I'd check on him when it was quiet and he'd always be sound asleep.
He's now 12 and has always been an excellent sleeper and me leaving him to cry has had no adverse affects.
My ds is 10 months old and started sleeping through at 4 months . by 5 months hr was waking about 3 times a night . Just crying , not hungry , wet etc . fast forward 5 months and he has been worse than ever . waking after being put to bed after an hour . between 6-8 times a night.
The start of the week I decided enough was enough I felt like I was breaking down .
I began with 2 minutes then 5 then 10 . I didn't need to go past 10 and he had settled by about 8 and woke about 3 times that night , second night about the same , 3rd night only 1 wake up . 4th night no wake ups .. (although he slept at my mom's ) this is the 5th night and so far he's been in bed for 4 hours and not woken whereas usually I'd have already been into him a few times !
We started cc last night .
It was horrible
DS was waking up every 90mins-2hours until about 3/4 weeks ago when it got a bit better but he seems to have stuck at 2 night wakings at 12.30ish and 3ish, then waking at around 5am when I bring him in with me to desperately try and get him back down for another hour or so. We've had naps sorted out for a couple of months now (he self settles beautifully) and he took being night weaned with good grace last week so I didn't expect last night to be quite so bad.
He woke at 12.30 and went back down with a bit of back rubbing. He woke at 3.10 crying, I went in did a bit of back rubbling/sshh patting and left. He then cried for nearly two hours. I never left him for more than 5/6 minutes and every time I did he'd quieten down, lay down and I'd think he'd gone down. Then the second I left it started again. After an hour DP stared saying that I should just feed him but that would've felt like two steps back so I stuck at it. Will try again tonight and tomorrow night then give it up as a bad job.
I'll be gutted if it doesn't work as this was really my last resort (as I think is generally the case with cc). I'm pregnant and in that exhausted first trimester stage. I can't carry on spending an hour and a half (at least) every night between 10 and 5 rocking and cuddling DS to sleep.
If you're going to do it OP (and this is going to sound awful) I would really recommend ear plugs or a night away for one of you. There really was no need for OH to go through last night too. Just make the one who's least likely to "crack" be the one that stays. Last night OH would have fed and rocked him after an hour.
We put DS into his own nursery and he slept 8 hours straight!! We couldn't believe it. He woke at 4am and although we had no plans to start TTC yet (we were going to start next weekend) after DS still awake and crying and grizzling an hour and a half later I said "Enough is enough" and CC began. Me and DH took it in turns to go in and DS had cried himself to sleep within 35 minutes, I couldn't believe it!!
I decided to try CC for his morning nap and I was dreading it as DS has always been fed to sleep for his naps - and I do mean always - but the boy who has never, ever napped in his cot was asleep after only 15 minutes of CC. I was just gobsmacked!!
That's meant to say we had no plans to start CC, not TTC
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