My DS is 8 months old and I feel embarrassed to admit that he is fed to sleep for every nap and I let him nap in my arms. He has never napped in his cot. I have tried a few times but he just cries and cries and because I'm so desperate for him to sleep I give in to the tears and let him feed and then sleep in my arms.
However, yesterday I confirmed my return to work date as being only 8 weeks away and when I go back to work things will be a lot different for DS (not really relevant to post though).
Anyway - because of this I absolutely know that I have GOT to stop feeding him to sleep and instead be able to put him down in his cot and for him to settle off on his own.
His first nap today was on me and lasted 25 minutes - very poor.
For his second nap I let him feed to sleep (as I was do desperate to get a nap out of him) but he woke up after 25 minutes. He was still clearly very, very tired so I put him in his cot to see if he'd settle back off but he had a complete meltdown. I waited 5-10 minutes to see if he'd settle but he was getting so distressed and frantic that I gave up and bought him downstairs. He was obviously still tired.
I bought him down at about 2pm and I'm thinking that seeing as 1.5 hours have passed I might go and put him back in his cot and see if he sleeps. He looks so tired 
How long should I leave him in his cot before accepting a nap is not going to happen? I can't just leave him there for ages otherwise bedtime will come round.
I'm determined to sort out all the issues I have with DS's sleep because I've allowed him to get into some very bad habits 
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Writerwannabe83 · 02/12/2014 15:29
I could have written your post, hang in there, you CAN do this. It was hard but we managed it despite being at a starting point of me going to bed with ds at 7, feeding to sleep and staying with him all night. Does he feed in the night?
I started by getting him to unlatch whilst still barely awake, the Pantley pull off if you've read the no cry sleep solution? It was a slow process, took a few week but we got there. I was very anti cry but soon realized that for us there was going to be some crying but never left alone at the start.
I got help from a USA company which is email based but very very helpful and supportive. I'll let you know who if you want to pm me, not sure i am allowed to post the name. The key was getting ds to fall asleep in his cot, by himself at bedtime. I thought it would never happen.
I started with bedtime only, carrying on feeding to sleep at night wakings which were 2 hourly til he was 10 months. I let him fall asleep on my bed without boob in mouth, I unlatched him nearly asleep & if he complained I let him relatch for a few mins then tried again, repeat and repeat until it works. I think I did it for an hour one night. Once asleep I stayed with him for 20 mins until in deep sleep & crept away. Gradually I could unlatch him awake but sleepy and then cuddle/sshh to sleep. It took a few weeks. Once that was achieved I settled him on my bed & lifted him into cot awake but sleepy. I stroked his back & sshh'd to sleep, it was hard, took ages in the first week but then he got the hang of it himself. It was still only at bedtime though, we co slept after his first wake up & fed to sleep.
Once we mastered that, I decided no milk or co sleeping til midnight, just resettling by sshh and stroke, never taking out of cot unless absolutely necessary. I extended that to no milk/ co sleeping til 4, then 6.
I still fed to sleep/co slept at naps as without good naps night sleep was truly awful.
Typing this it sounds quick and easy. It bloody wasn't. We tried PUPD, CC, didn't work for us, ds just got the rage. I did have to step away for 5 mins most nights at bedtime to compose myself, ds howled but calmed down too.
I wouldn't try sorting night & naps together. Nights then naps worked for us. Not that nights were perfect before we started on naps, just better and so I felt more capable. I think my ds could still only manage 2.5 hrs awake before napping at 8 months. Over tiredness wrecks bedtimes & night sleep here.
Eventually we got to the point where I put him in his cot sleepy, with a musical nightlight and left the room. At first he cried/grumbled for 10-15 mins but that reduced to about 1 min over a few weeks.
It was awful but necessary. Once improvements started it seemed to get better in leaps with a few setbacks. Sleep deprivation is a shocker. Keep posting and good luck 
Awake and screaming. I've tried rocking, patting, shushing and singing but he's going crazy. He kept thrashing around when I was holding him so I put him in his cot. The cries escalated to a whole other sound level. I'm having a minute to myself before I go back in to him
Another 20 minutes have passed and he's still going
He's still screaming downstairs. It's been going on for an hour now. I'm going to have to feed him aren't I He's so, so, so tired, he hasn't slept properly for two days (and nights) and he's inconsolable.
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