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Controlled crying. I'm desperate.

6 replies

Writerwannabe83 · 17/11/2014 20:03

I'm in tears most days and nights over my 8m/o poor sleep behaviours. He can be up every 1.5-2 hours overnight and naps in the day are non existent. He screams and screams if I ever put him in his cot whilst awake. He used to feed to sleep but even that doesn't work anymore.

I'm starting to resent him and not enjoy him. I'm tearful now as yet again I'm starting out on what will be a shit night followed by a shit day.

I'm so tired and so desperate.

I always thought I'd never do CC but I just don't know what else to do. I can't carry on like this.

OP posts:
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Namedilemma · 17/11/2014 21:03

Do it. Honestly, it will work, it will transform your life and he will be well-rested and so much happier. It's a tough three days but I've read a lot of your posts and you've had a really tough 8 months so what do you have to lose? Im sure a lot of his crying is not because he is 'difficult' just because he is tired but has no idea how to get himself off to sleep.
I'm afraid I just don't believe anyone who says CC has any lasting ill effects. I know so many people who've done it and their children are quite evidently happy and fine - much happier than children who still aren't sleeping properly at the age of 5 or whatever.

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EmbarrassedPossessed · 17/11/2014 21:18

Apologies if this is a stupid question, but have you tried other sleep training approaches like PUPD, shush-pat, gradual retreat etc?

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GeorgeTheGiraffe · 17/11/2014 21:51

Hugs. I've just done a kind of gradual retreat/controlled crying with my 8mo dd over the last few weeks for a similar prob to yours. She still cries a lot on going to bed (less for naps interestingly!) but she is now sleeping SO much better at night which has helped me no end. I was really reluctant to let my baby cry but in the end something had to change and nothing else worked.
Someone on here told me about this website www.troublesometots.com which I've found really helpful. There's also a Facebook page with the same title xx

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PenguinsandtheTantrumofDoom · 17/11/2014 21:59

I am not totally anti-cc. Just beware the one thing no one warns you: it doesn't always work. Of course, you don't know until you've tried.

Is your son crawling yet? I found DD1 and DD2 both improved dramatically in their naps once they were crawling.

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NickyEds · 18/11/2014 15:23

Don't beat yourself up about cc. I've found that the parents who wax lyrical about never leaving their babies to cry haven't been woken up every 90 minutes for months on end.
If it helps any my DS started the "waking every 90 minutes thing" at around 7 months. I really worked on naps first and was all set to do cc (after putting it off again and again) at night when he suddenly started to sleep better. No help but light at then end of the tunnel.

No sleep is all-of-life consuming. It's awful. I've been putting on weight as I've been too knackered to walk, snapping at OH, missing out on seeing friends as Ds's naps/over tiredness made it hard, getting ill as I've been so run down....I could go on....

Try it. Could it possibly be worse than this?? Getting Ds to nap in his cot was really hard but now I have a bit of free time in the day and that really helps.

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Littlef00t · 19/11/2014 21:34

I did cc and it really worked for us, and I just want to add that we made sure we did some play in the cot several times a day so it was seen as a happy place as she had got to the point where she would cry even as I was lowering her into it.

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