Settling a newborn in the crib

[onceipopicantstop]

Hi just wondering what others wrap/dress their newborn in for sleep. Ds2 born early hours of Friday, first night at home last night and was dreadful! Breastfeeding and little milk yet so ds was trying to feed and just getting frustrated. Then would only sleep on me. Tried several times to settle him in his own bed and just ended up with a screaming baby - and trying to feed again! He had on a vest and gro and later I tried a hat too. Room not cold. Tried tucking him in firmly with a sheet and blanket up to shoulder level. Also tried swaddling in a sheet with another sheet over the top. Neither successful. Dh and I were both very tired after 2 nights of labouring which didn't help of course.
Ds eventually fell asleep in our bed after I fed him lying down. I'm very nervous about cosleeping so in desperation we left him in our bed well away from me, with a pillow at the edge to stop him falling out. And poor dh stayed up and checked on us frequently to make sure baby was safe. This meant at least I had some sleep but this is clearly not a sustainable plan!!
Today ds is feeding better but I still can't keep him asleep other than on me.
When ds1 arrived we had a similar problem and resorted to a fleecy swaddle that someone gave us. It worked brilliantly but I know there's some debate about their use - so was trying to avoid it this time.
I'm just wondering where we're going wrong? Does he need more or heavier layers??
Any advice appreciated as can't cope with another night like the last the last one!!

[Mumof3xx]

I would loose the hat

How much does he weigh? Would he be safe in a grobag?

[Mumof3xx]

And did you try blankets with his arms out? All of mine prefered to have hands free

[onceipopicantstop]

I only tried the hat in case he was cold - but it didn't help. Tried arms in and out! He is a big baby - nearly 10lb - so will try a grobag tonight. Also maybe prewarming the bed with a hot water bottle?

[Mumof3xx]

Id give a grobag a go maybe he dislikes feeling "tucked in" or "swaddled"

[Mumof3xx]

Where has he been sleeping in the day op? I just ask as if he's sleeping on someone for all his day time naps he might expect this

[Sid77]

I don't think you can go wrong, it's his first night of being in the outside world! Aren't they programmed to feed every couple of hours to stimulate your milk - and therefore only want to be on you. Give him a few days to adjust to life on the outside!!

[onceipopicantstop]

We have a crib downstairs and I'm trying to put him down for naps but he seems to lie there awake for a while and then starts crying. With ds1 I always put him down for naps in our bedroom but the current advice is to have them in the same room or nearby at all times because of sids. Not ideal as room is bright and we have a noisy 4 year old!

[TheScience]

Before your milk comes in he's likely to need to feed almost constantly so I doubt it's temperature or blankets keeping him awake. Newborns instinctively know they need to be close to you.

[onceipopicantstop]

Maybe it was just a first night thing - it was just that we had similar problems with ds1 despite being in hospital for the first week (he slept fine in hospital but not at home) so I wondered if I was missing something obvious?!

[TheScience]

No, it's totally normal newborn behaviour!

[ThefutureMrsTatum]

I had the same problem with DS. I put my used breat pads inside the Moses basket when I took them out of my bra to change them, so it smelt like me. Just tucked them next to the mattress at the top end. Worked brilliant. Obviously dont leave the same one there for days, just change them when u change the ones in your bra. I didn't have to do it after a few days he just got used to being in the basket.

[Lj8893]

Totally normal newborn behaviour!!

Dd was exactly the same, I can't pinpoint anything the worked exactly or when exactly she began to sleep happily in her Moses basket. It just happened naturally. She did love napping in her bouncer chair so maybe you could try one of those so at least you can get some daytime naps in!

[Mumof3xx]

I must of been lucky! 3 babies who all napped in the Moses basket from day one!

[ThefutureMrsTatum]

Hmm helpful!

[Lj8893]

Yep mum you were lucky!

[onceipopicantstop]

Things much better. Milk coming in and he is more content. Fed almost constantly from 10pm until 4am last night - thought he was never going to stop!! - but then slept for 3 hours in his grobag in his cot!! And has napped downstairs today as well. So think we're heading the right way!

[ThefutureMrsTatum]

Glad things are better.

[chocolatecheesecake]

As well as having something that smells of you in the basket, putting a hot water bottle in the basket and removing it as you put the baby in also makes the transition easier. Only needed for first couple of days!

[luckiestgirlintheworld]

What I learnt is that for anything in the first week, before your milk comes in properly, is just do what works. Your baby won't settle properly because they don't have a nice full belly- so mine would only sleep while being cuddled. It meant I didn't really sleep for a couple of nights but at that stage I was still running in newborn adrenaline I think!

I just wish I knew not to worry if it would last and be sustainable because when my milk came in it all changed and he would sleep much better!