DD is 10mo and has co-slept from birth. It's worked pretty well up until this past month, which has been awful. She's always been fed to sleep with me lying down next to her but now she wakes up as soon as I move and starts crying. She will go to sleep without milk as long as DH is lying next to her but again, wakes up crying as soon as he moves. She's up several times in the night and has to be fed back to sleep. She's also now getting up really early at 0530/0600 and refuses to go back to sleep. Instead, she's really grumpy and whinges all morning and is back to having 3 or 4 naps a day (either fed to sleep in my lap or drifts off in the car). She's not ill, hasn't been teething and has been eating and drinking normally.
I think we might all sleep better if she moved to her own room. I've tried doing a bath, teeth, story, milk, bed routine but she is crying hysterically as soon as I put her in her cot and doesn't stop.
I found the gradual retreat method worked really. The first few nights I cuddled and rocked him until he went to sleep, the next few nights I just held him, then I led next to him, then held him whilst he was in his cot, then held his hand, then sat next to him, then gradually moved out of the room. If he woke in the night I would generally repeat how I got him to sleep. You have to wait about 10mins to make sure they are really asleep. It is a gentle and long method but you can be flexible with it for holidays and illnesses and it isn't very stressful. You do need the energy and mindset to do it.
The book 'teach your child to sleep' is the best book I have read on sleeping. Practical and not preachy!
It's funny there have been lots of threads recently about co sleeping and I think I have read most of them. We have a young lady living with us at the moment who is co sleeping wither her newborn. Personally I am not a fan of co sleeping because of the dangers but I get that you get your sleep, I just think the dangers outweigh the pros of it.
You just have to stick with the bed time routine, bath, milk story in bed and cuddle for a couple of mins then controlled crying. I wish you luck with the routine.
Move your milk to early on in the bedtime routine so bath, milk, pj, book and bed. Avoid overtiredness by making bedtime 2.5 hours from the last nap and regular naps in the day (2 at 10 months usually, this will improve with self settling)
She needs to learn self settling so either CIO, cc, gradual retreat, camping out whichever you feel most appropriate - just be consistent.
I would move her into her own room with a blackout blind and night light. A teddy to cuddle too.