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Just spent 2 hours trying to do gradual retreat with 13 mo. I eventually gave in and fed him

(7 Posts)
peanutbuttersarnies Fri 17-May-13 21:28:37

It took about 30 seconds for him to fall asleep with a quick feed. Only twice has he managed to fall asleep without rocking or feeding. They do eventually get it dont they? If I just wait til it sorts itself out? Cos at the moment sleep training just looks like such hard work. I don't think I could do another 2 hours of that! Can't believe he had the energy to last 2 hours.

whoopwhoopbib Fri 17-May-13 21:59:37

I feel your pain, we started a loose version of sleep training about 5 weeks ago as dd has a cough so didn't want her screaming for hours and making herself sick.

Before we started I would feed her and either me or dp would carry her up to bed asleep and have to sit beside her cot for 30 minutes+ to make sure she was fully asleep. Then we would carefully lower her into her cot whereby she would start screaming and we would have to start again.

Now I feed her in her room and as soon as she has finished I am bored I put her into the cot with her cuddly, shhh her and sometimes lay my hand on her and 9 times out of 10 she goes to sleep.

The first few times I tried this she did scream and scream for 2 hours which I knew she was capable of and even now if she doesn't want to go to sleep she will cry and keep standing up but I just keep laying her down again and eventually she will relax and go to sleep. It hasn't made her sleep all the way through every night but a lot of that is to do with her persistent cough so it's not totally her fault iyswim.

I would say to try again as it is meant to take them a few times before they realise what it is you are trying to get them to do.

whoopwhoopbib Fri 17-May-13 22:00:36

oh she's 14 months btw so 13 months when we started.

peanutbuttersarnies Sat 18-May-13 07:40:36

Thanks for the reply. I kept thinking he would get there in the end. But it just seemed to go on forever. He rolled around in his cut with his eyes closed for ages. He just couldn't seem to manage to actually drop off to sleep. I suppose I will have to try again. Maybe dh will have more luck as he can't resort to feeding.

magicstars Sat 18-May-13 08:00:08

I posted about parenting my 14mo to sleep last week. Tried gradual retreat once & it was horrible with dd getting really upset. A few people replied to say their DCs grew out of it, so I've decided not to persist with sleep training for now.

seeker Sat 18-May-13 08:02:26

Honestly, they all grow out of it eventually. If a quick feed gets them to sleep, then feed! Whatever's easiest is the right thing to do.

peanutbuttersarnies Sat 18-May-13 10:43:43

Thanks. I just hope he outgrows it before about 2.5. I dont really want to be feeding a 3 yo to sleep. My older ds is 3 and the thought of feeding him doesn't appeal much! Older ds took bottles so we switched to bottles at 1 and he settled ok in cot. Need to do things differently this time though. You hear about people complaining that they need to cuddle their little one to sleep, but I'd be totally fine with that. He won't settle with just a cuddle though!

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