Advanced search

HELP ME! Co-Sleeping, Sibling Style

(13 Posts)
expatinscotland Sat 20-May-06 20:16:38

As many of you know, our family lives in a fairly small two bed flat, so it's a given that our two daughters - DD1 is three next month and DD2 is 5 months - will need to share a room.

B/c of my PND and sleep problems affecting it, once DD2 got into sleeping all night last month, DH would sleep w/her in the living room and I'd sleep in our bedroom.

That meant our living room was out of commission from about 9PM.

Well, as you can imagine, that started to be sort of a problem, b/c that's where the telly, dining table - kitchen is too small for eating in, PC, etc. are.

So we are moving DD2 in w/DD1.

Either DD1 winds DD2 up or DD2 won't settle and the other one has trouble falling asleep.

ANY tips for co-sleeping siblings? This is a nightmare.

me23 Sat 20-May-06 20:31:47

no advice I'm afraid, but you have my sympathies, will be watching this thread for tips aswell. I'm pregnant with 2nd, and as I only have a 1 bedroom flat babies will have the bedroom me and dp sleep in the living room(which isn't ideal obv)

foxinsocks Sat 20-May-06 20:34:26

they get used to each other's noise in the end - I can't remember how long it took but in the end, they start sleeping through each other's racket

however, I find mine either wake up earlier or stay up a bit later chatting than if they are on their own in their own rooms

jamiesam Sat 20-May-06 20:40:53

No real advice either here I'm afraid.

Do they have to go to bed at the same time? Even 1/2 hrs difference might help? Esp if it's big sister who's going to bed later - make her feel responsible for not waking up her baby sister?

My ds's have co-slept but only since they were 4 and 2 - but was young enough for them to get over the excitement of being in the same room together, before ds2 could really say very much (babble but no speak!) We generally have a routine still of allowing them to chat/mess about (as long as in bed) for a bit, give them two or three warnings, and then turn the light out (from being on lowest setting of dimmer switch...)

If you think they'd really enjoy it (to the extent of being excited and naughty), could you introduce it as a temporary thing, and only keep co-sleeping up if they (well, dd1!) are good enough? Dd1 doesn't have to know that there is no return!

Co-sleeping has been unbelievably successful, not as I anticipated.

MerlinsBeard Sat 20-May-06 20:46:45

mine are in same room (3 and 1) it took a while for them to settle, they were excited, nervous etc . i didn't move ds2 until he was 9 months tho. Now they usually settle quite quickly but we have the odd night when they are awake giggling (like tonight) i found that if u try and keep calm and expect a certain amount of disruption then it will settle quickly.

I tried to keep their routines the same but decided to extend ds1's bedtime to half 7 ish to give ds2 time to settle. Doesn't always work minsd you

sorry, no real advice

expatinscotland Sat 20-May-06 20:48:49

well i've got my fingers crossed for tonight. dd2 cried out a few times, but dd1 was SO shattered from the two hours i took her out to splash in puddles in her mac and wellie boots she crashed out.

Mercy Sat 20-May-06 21:06:59

Expat , first of all I didn't realise you've been suffering PMT Hope you recover soon.

Secondly , I have a similar age gap between my two. I moved ds in with dd when he was 7 months. It worked well to start with, especially as dd was always coming into our room because she was 'lonely' as she kept telling us.

The only problem was when one of them was ill and woke the other up - but obviously the ill one would come in with us. The big problem was was when both of them were ill; we didn't have enough room in our bed for everyone!

This was been solved by putting dd's mattress at the end our our bed so we can keep an eye on both of them, rotate them even.

They now sleep inseparate rooms though. Ok we have 3 bedrooms although ds' is a box room.

Not much help I know but good luck!

hugeheadofhair Sat 20-May-06 21:07:15

DS1 and DS2 sleep together since 3 and 5 years of age, and it took perhaps a week or two to get used to falling asleep together. I find that (but the ages are quite different) that they need each other now to fall asleep. If one is not there the other will just be waiting for him to come to bed. And they usually don't wake each other during the night, even if one makes a noise of some sort (snoring/crying/waking). We co-slept with them before putting them together, although DS1 had 11/2 year on his own, but being allowed in our bed whenever he wanted, and that helped I think. I took longer for DS1 to fall asleep by himself on his own than DS2 at the same age in his brother's bedroom.

But to give some advice: I think I would try to find out who is least disruptive at going to bed time. Is it easier when baby is already asleep when DD1 joins her or the other way around? Babys don't understand they have to be quiet, do they, or is she a light sleeper? They will settle with each other in the end, and I'm sure will love it, like my DSs. Hth.

expatinscotland Sat 20-May-06 21:17:22

They are both deep sleepers, luckily, like DH.

I think if it starts to be a prob, however, DD1 will go down first and then we'll put DD2 in, good thinking, hugeheadofhair!

Hope to be in a three-bed, but it will be next year at the earliest, although I tend to be conservative about that and I'll say 2 years.

Mercy Sat 20-May-06 21:22:33

Sorry I meant PND

hugeheadofhair Sat 20-May-06 21:34:29

More sleep must be the way forward, mustn't it. Hope you soon get over your PND, expat, it must be hard.

expatinscotland Sun 21-May-06 22:14:33

Thanks for the tips, ladies!

After another wretched night,we put DD1 down first, as she is the soundest sleeper. Waited about half an hour - dd2 needed a light top up feed, anyhow - and put dd2 in.

She narked a bit, but dd1 didn't wake and now she's sleeping.

I'm HOPING they don't wake each other up in the night.

expatinscotland Sun 21-May-06 23:25:59

well, so much for that idea.

dd2 is back in our bedroom and i'm out on the living room fold out couch.

dd1 waking up yelling every hour and waking the baby.

just canNOT deal w/the sleep deprivation again now i'm back to work full time and dd1 is just playing up.

she got all upset when we moved dd2 back out.

maybe later on when she's older, but for now looks like dh and i will be sleeping in separate beds.

we haven't slept in the same bed since dd1 was about 6 months old anyway - we lived in a one-bed flat and i had to work full-time and was on so many drugs for PND it was a miracle i even got to sleep at all.


Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now »

Already registered? Log in with: