PLEASE HELP ME(6 Posts)
Im loosing my mind.
My 22 month old daughter keeps waking in the night. She started sleeping through at 6 weeks but since 6 months when we got rid of the dummy (fed up of waking to re-insert) we have had nothing but problems. Initially she would sleep through for 3/4 weeks and then we'd have a week or so of sleepless nights, but recently its getting to the point where we seem to have 4/5 days sleeping through followed by 4/5 days of not. We stupidly got into the bad habbit of letting her take milk to bed to drink to go to sleep which was ok for a while until she started waking for milk, which to start with we did as it was easy to get it and her go straight back off, until she'd down 9oz and cry for more then wake as she was wet due to amout of fluids. So about April this year we got rid of the bottle and this is when things have got worse. She is now still waking crying for bot bot after almost 9 months. There isnt a pattern of what time she wakes, but whatever time she wakes she will be awake for 1.5-2 hours.
Things weve tried:
Leaving her, if she isnt screaming (sometimes just shouts)
She switches light on in her room (because shes in box room only other place we can fit cot, is under window and she pulls curtain pole down), so tried just standing outside her door and as soon as she switches light on I go in switch it off, lie her down, and this is repeated upto 10 times until she takes the hint and lies down, but still wont go back to sleep.
Tried more food/less food
More clothes/less clothes
Earlier/later bed times
She isnt thristy as offer water but just throws on floor.
Ive never rewarded her waking with cuddles etc.
I feel like im loosing my mind, I work almost full time, hubby works nights and when he is on days he does 60 hours a weeks, plus gets up at 5, and he doesnt seem to hear her, so although he'll say wake me and ill help by the time ive woke him im awake anyway.
She has the loudest cry ever, and I feel bad for the neighbours. Luckily my DS who is 4 is a heavy sleeper so she doesnt always wake him.
She also intermittently wants to start the day at 5am, but ive noticed this tends to happen when she has a later night for whatever reason (usually asleep by 6-6.30)
She is also on the boarder between dropping sleeps, she will still have a nap but have to make sure she doesnt sleep past mid-day or else cant get her to bed.
I feel awful saying this but im starting to hate her when she wakes, shes beautiful and so clever, but god i wish she'd just sleep.
Any tips. Just to say weve done exactly same with DD as we did with DS and hes a great sleeper, always has been.
Shes still in cot and think over xmas whilst im off work ill change it to the bed, but tbh I dont see this making any difference.
Could you take the lightbulb out to stop her turning the light on? Maybe just use the light outside in the hall for light or a nightlight.
How long is she napping, and at what times, and is she happy to nap? I also think 6/6.30pm is a bit early for bedtime. I would say try pushing her nap (if she has one) to between 12-1pm and have her into bed at 7.
Have you tried introducing a 'lovey'? A stuffed animal/blanket/whatever, that is her comfort for bedtime? From the history with the dummy and bottle, it sounds like she does need something to help her get to sleep, and a teddy may work.
I don't know if I would change her cot to a bed yet, she may just start escaping from the room.
Thanks for coming back to me.
Good idea re the bulb I'd never thought of that.
She usually goes to sleep at nursery about 11 and will have anywhere from 10mins to an hour, generally 30mins. On a weekend she won't sleep for us unless in the car. I agree that her bedtime does seem early, and she always went down at 7ish but in the last month or so it seems like she needs it as is asking to go at that time, especially if she hasn't had a nap. Also generally she will go thru til 7ish with the occasional early start which seems to co inside with a later bed time.
I don't know I'm all out with thinking about it all iykwim. I'm fed up of creeping around petrified of waking her.
Oh and she has a blankie which she won't go down without n has loads of teddies.
Just an update, we're still having problems. Took lightbulb out which solved that problem. Ended up changing from cot to bed as she started throwing herself out, but that's made no difference either better or worse. Had acouple of weeks where thought we'd cracked it, but last two nights she's been screaming again, asking for cuddles and awake for over an hour shouting.
Also since beforemxmas she's been getting up between 5.30/6. Tried bringing bedtime later but if she hasn't had a sleep she is in a state by 6ish so have to put her to bed.
My DD stopped sleeping and napping at that age too, also did the hurling herself out of her cot so we had to put her in a bed. I have no idea what caused it, but I think we are coming out the other end at nearly 26 months.
We tried: leaving her and only going in when she was really upset, then calming her and leaving her- did nothing.
Having her in bed with us- she wouldn't sleep.
Sleeping on her floor- prob made it worse, but at some points we all had to sleep as we were on the edge!
CIO after checking she was OK first- less upsetting for her actually than going in and out, took about a week, then it all went wrong again.
Piriton: she had an awful cold and it was suggested by a Dr: improved things for a while, but it started slipping again.
I have no idea what caused it. Teething abd developmental leaps that turn into bad habits I think. Every time we crack it something changes or a new tooth comes through and ruins it all, but her last 2 are about to come through so I am hopeful that will be the end of it.
My DD needs to nap, now she is napping again things are so much better. She would never nap for long enough at nursery either, she needs a dark room on her own or sometimes the pushchair with the rain cover on works. I am unfortunately unemployed at the moment so I can't suggest how you can try and force naps at nursery.
If DD has a nap I now put her to bed around 7pm, it always used to be 6.30pm. If she doesn't nap it's 6pm. A later nap time works better now, it was always 12, now it has to be 1/1.30pm and I wake her at 3pm. Although most days I have to wake her at 2.30pm so I can collect DS from school.
I am trying a gro-clock for the first time tonight, but I think your DD might be a little young for that?
I don't know if any of that helps, but I just wanted to empathise really, we have felt truly broken at times
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