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4 month sleep regression hell - anyone want to join me?!

(58 Posts)
lucylookout Sun 18-Nov-12 19:03:55

DS2 is 18 weeks on Tuesday. He has always been a rubbish sleeper, waking up 3 times a night was considered BRILLIANT, but, since he turned 16 weeks, things have taken a turn for the (even) worse. Last night he woke up 6 times between 7 and 10pm (mainly while I was trying to watch The Killing III). I then lost count of how many times he carried on waking up after that. He came into bed with me when I couldn't settle him fairly easily in his cot anymore (which is what I usually do) at around 3am (I'm feeding to sleep unless I can get away with popping his dummy back in and/or giving him a quick cuddle). We slept better that way but still not great. He was unsettled and I was being head butted, punched and kicked (lots of throwing legs into the air trying to get farts out). And as for daytime? He goes to sleep quite easily, but will only sleep 20 or 30 minutes 4 or 5 times a day. He is tired almost as soon as he wakes up from a nap.
Oh, and thrown into the mix are the after effects of last weeks immunisations, a cold and possibly teething (lots of finger gnawing and nappy rash).
Is anyone else going through anything similar? I'm sure DS1 went through the same but I just can't remember it in any detail. I think he got the hang of long day time naps around 6 months. Does that sound right? I just have to ride it out don't I and take a kind of 'needs must' approach for now.....

MogwaiTheGremlin Sun 18-Nov-12 19:56:00

I'll join you!
Ds is 18 weeks and has been going through the exact same thing for a month now. We're back to co-sleeping whilst dh is in the spare room getting his full 8 hours grrrr envy
The worst thing for me is the total unpredictability. I literally have no idea when ds is going to wake up as each night is different from the last. I find myself lying in bed waiting to be disturbed - madness!
I feel bad for outing him like this because he's also teething (two cut through already) and is being an absolute trooper with that unlike his mother who is a total hypochondriac
Oh and if one more person asks if he is 'sleeping through the night yet' I will scream!

lucylookout Sun 18-Nov-12 20:29:46

Glad to meet you mogwai and am glad someone else is going through the same as me. I know what you mean about the unpredictability, I daren't have a shower even tonight because I don't know when he'll wake next (well, after he next goes back to sleep that is, he went to bed at 7, woke at 7.15, went back at 8, woke at 8.15, am currently holding him waiting for right time to put him back in his cot!) this doesn't bode we'll for the rest of the night. I keep telling myself it could be worse, but then guess what, it all gets a little bit worse!
Poor little mog and his teeth, it's certainly not easy for them either.

LisaMWill Sun 18-Nov-12 20:34:33

Hi, my dd2 is 17 weeks and wakes every 2 hours until 4 when she decides that's playtime. Like yourself, nap times are quick 20 minute naps, she is constantly miserable as she is so tired but i can't seem to get her to sleep longer day or night. Sure dd1 wasn't this bad!

lucylookout Sun 18-Nov-12 20:42:53

Lisa, that sounds painful. Can you get her back to sleep before you all have to get up?
DS's saving grace at the moment is that he sleeps until 7.30 or 8 in the morning (catching up on how little he sleeps during the night).

LisaMWill Sun 18-Nov-12 21:46:35

I get her in bed with me at 4 i can usually stretch it to about 5.30 and then get up with her! Keep telling myself that they aren't babies for long and they r not like this forever....

lucylookout Sun 18-Nov-12 22:20:23

I know Lisa, things do change very quickly, and there's so much about this age that's very sweet and lovely.

Well, confounding my expectations DS is still asleep after his 8pm wake up. I'm going to try to get a bit of sleep now before the shenanigans start again!

Merida Mon 19-Nov-12 21:50:55

I am right there with you. DS, 6 months, has been pretty much identical to your DC. The other night he surpassed himself by refusing to sleep til 0130 and then waking up nine times between then and 0700. Sometimes he'll lull me into a false sense of security and sleep for nearly six hours (!) before then going to back to the usual chaos.

To make matters worse, step sis has a 2 month old who sleeps from 8pm-6am. She complained the other day about her terrible night's sleep as he'd woken up at 3am and she had to get up and put his dummy in...

lucylookout Mon 19-Nov-12 22:27:15

Hi Merida, nice to meet you. It is infuriating when other people's babies sleep well, particularly their interpretation of a 'bad' night. I do get consolation from the fact that this is my second dc. With ds1, we did everything 'wrong' in terms of sleep associations etc and he was a terrible sleeper. With ds2 I've done everything 'right', and do you know what? He's a terrible sleeper too! It really is true that it's just luck of the draw, or in the genes perhaps.
Did your troubles start at 4 months or has it always been bad? Have you seen any improvement? <hopeful>
DS has woken twice since 7 but has gone back to sleep quickly after a quick cuddle. He's got a streaming cold bless him, and his cough and noisy, squeaky nose have been waking him up. Let's hope he manages a not too bad night, I'm getting married tomorrow and could really do with a bit of beauty sleep!

IceNoSlice Tue 20-Nov-12 02:17:07

Congratulations Lucy! Hope you all have a fabulous day.

My DS (14 weeks) is similar to this. And I'm suspicious that he starting to teeth- rosy cheeks, dribble, gnawing in his and my hands, nappy rash despite cream galore...

Thread watching for any tips!

zoobrown Tue 20-Nov-12 03:11:39

My DS started this about 19 weeks, things began to improve at about 22 weeks with daytime sleep, but he is still waking lots at night. He is v hungry though and feeds well every time. He goes down about 7 then wakes randomly after that, tonight it's been 10, 12, 2, 3, we'll see what happens next!

zoobrown Tue 20-Nov-12 06:11:49

4.30, 5.50....

MogwaiTheGremlin Tue 20-Nov-12 07:39:35

Have a fabulous wedding Lucy! Hope you got your beauty sleep!

MillionPramMiles Tue 20-Nov-12 09:57:47

LucyLO: lots of sympathy, my 6 month old dd is also a very poor sleeper, day and night, since 12 weeks old. FWIW Here's a few things I've found helped sometimes (not all the time by any means but at least some of the time...):
- Feed, feed, feed. Dd is now formula fed and on solids, I find the better she feeds, the better she sleeps. I'm probably setting myself up to have an obese toddler :-0 but I do get her to be as active as possible and all her solids foods are healthy fruit and veg.
- some babies respond well to a routine (definitely the case for mine). I've worked out when she is most likely to be tired during the day and what time in the evening she is likely to have had enough, I've tried to stick to these times for naps and bedtime. Same routine (lullaby, cuddly toy, etc) for both naps and bedtime.
- cuddly toys (lots of them in the cot), if dd can grab one when she wakes then she tends to chew on it and go back to sleep.
- I started to leave her to cry a little (a few minutes at most) during the night, mainly cause I was so exhausted after months of 3 hours sleep a night. She's now started to settle herself back to sleep, most times after a minute or two. If the crying is different (eg teething, if she has a cold etc) then I go in straight away but often it's simply a 'is it wake time?' shout or she is crying out in her sleep.

Sleep deprivation is terrible (for you and the baby), hang in there and hope it gets better...

whenwilltherebegoodnews Tue 20-Nov-12 10:06:56

Hello another hideous sleeping 19 wk old here.... He was doing okay (2 night feeds) until about 16 wks but its all gone downhill. No predictability either, last night he was first up at 8.30, the night before it was midnight. It gets progressively worse from 4am, then the toddler is up. Only feeding him seems to settle him, he won't entertain the dummy that hr happily takes during the day.

To make matters worse, my 3 yo was one of those rare breeds who slept through from early on.

Tea and sympathy all round.

MogwaiTheGremlin Tue 20-Nov-12 10:47:28

Million is it safe to have toys in the cot? I thought they could be a suffocation hazard so my poor ds doesn't have a single one. I feel really mean now! blush

He sleeps face down (i know the risks and its not a decision i took lightly) so I have always been a bit crazy paranoid about sids

MillionPramMiles Tue 20-Nov-12 15:26:06

Mogwai: I did worry about that originally but i've a friend who is a midwife and maternity nurse and she said she didnt think it was a problem now my dd is just over 6 months old. Dd is fairly dexterous with throwing the toys around so am guessing she should be ok.

MogwaiTheGremlin Tue 20-Nov-12 15:44:57

Ok thanks. My ds is a bit younger (and very uncoordinated!) so I may wait a bit longer before letting them loose!

belindarose Wed 21-Nov-12 20:44:10

Mine is 20 weeks and got worse from 14 weeks onwards I think. I'm in sleep deprivation hell with no longer than 90 minute stretches at night.

However, until today, he's always been easy (enough) to get to sleep. BF, cuddle, pat and white noise. Today, and tonight especially, he's decided to have none of that and would only scream in my arms. He's been in his cot for two hours now - happily rolling around and squealing with joy. If I pick him up he cries hysterically. So I'm lying in bed next to him while he tries to get my attention with his adorable cuteness.

He's been awake for nearly 5 hours. He is showing no signs of sleeping any time soon!

lucylookout Wed 21-Nov-12 22:53:24

Belindarose, I hope he's gone to sleep (and stayed asleep!) by now. How annoying that he's thrown that curve ball at you!
Million, thanks for the tips!
Goodnews, it's knackering isn't it! I hope you have a better night.
Mogwai, beauty sleep was not had, but luckily after 10 years together and 2dc it was too late for do (now dh!) to change his mind. We had a lovely day and ds2's cold was marginally better yesterday so he managed to sleep til 10.30 before his first wake up/feed so I could enjoy my Thai takeaway in relative peace (yes, we really lived it up!) Tonight he lasted til 10, so we'll see what happens from here on in.

lucylookout Thu 22-Nov-12 00:09:09

This is the second time awake since 10. It's not looking good tonight

lucylookout Thu 22-Nov-12 01:48:39

Third time <yawn>

zoobrown Thu 22-Nov-12 02:24:23

Hardly been to sleep! Up for about an hour between 12-1 chatting, singing having a great time! I thought he would be so exhausted he would sleep but no, up again an hour later!
Last night we only had 3 wake ups, I shouldn't have got excited thinking it was over!

lucylookout Thu 22-Nov-12 11:55:38

Zoo, how old is yours? I hope he stopped partying and that you all got some sleep.

belindarose Thu 22-Nov-12 12:10:17

What's with this chatting and squealing they do now?! I think I could cope with crying. But just being loud in the night for no reason is, well, annoying! Ultra cute in the daytime though.

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