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2.9yo sleep issues, baby due next week...

(4 Posts)
ShushBaby Mon 29-Oct-12 13:33:35

Dd (2.9) has been a decent sleeper, give or take the usual phases and issues. Since around 18 months we'd hit a sweet spot of her going to sleep with no fuss at 7pm, sleeping through til 6-6.30am, and amusing herself til her Gro Clock said she could get up at 6.30am.

She's been acting up a lot recently- I think it's partly the imminent arrival of a new sibling (due next week) and partly being 2! But I feel I could cope better with the behaviour stuff- which is generic tantrums/being stubborn etc, if her sleep hadn't gone tits up too.

She has started procrastinating/kicking off at bedtime, then waking 1-3 times in the night (tuck me in, I want a cuddle, I want a drink, etc). It takes just a minute to sort her out each time, but it is still disruptive and I object to it on principle ifyswim! The latest thing, which has happened a couple of times inc this morning, is to wake at 5am and then shout/ make demands until 6.30am.

We are concerned about just leaving her as a) she might need a wee (she's been nappy-free at night since 2yo) and b) we're worried she'll start getting out of bed/her room.

She's also started to refuse naps some days (she was having 2 hours/day) despite clearly being knackered.

Inevitably I end up getting cross. Just now when she'd refused lunch (because she was too tired after waking at 5!) and asked for a nap, she started to kick off once in bed. I told her I was 'sick of it', snapped at her to go to sleep- then came and cried because I felt so shitty for snapping at her, and because I am so tired.

My partner does more than his fair share of seeing to her in the night, esp as I am so heavily pregnant. So I'm not shouldering it on my own.

But I have actual fear of having a newborn with all the nocturnal madness this entails, and us having to deal with these issues with dd too.

Any advice?

MrsWooster Mon 29-Oct-12 21:54:51

HI, we just had the exact same thign, though he is only 2.4 (will be 2.9 when DC2 comes...) and it 'only' lasted aobut 10 days - in his case it was childminder disruption, we think. Even at only a minute a time the night waking is hell but with virtually no interaction, jsut basic check/settle, he pretty soon figured out that teh game wasn't worth the candle and packed it in.
Try not to beat yourself about snapping at her - it feels awful but we are only human (tho it doesn't feel like it at 3am) and weighed in her head against the hours of positive interaction she won't even notice. Stick to it for a bit longer and hopefully she'll settle. As for naps, just keep trying too - maybe that too will settle down if you boringly persist?

ShushBaby Tue 30-Oct-12 10:11:35

Thanks MrsWooster. Had a bad night last night, as she had a cold. But I'm hoping she settles down soon.

The frustating thing is, she totally gets what she should be doing. This morning she said the following in the space of one conversation:
- 'I shouted in the night'
- 'I should sleep all night with no shouting'
- 'when I sleep all night with no shouting mummy and daddy are happy and proud, and not tired'
- 'when I sleep all night with no shouting I can have a sticker'

Yet still she shouts! I think you are right, that minimal talking/intervention is what is required. DP tends to soothe and talk to her more, I just stumble in and bark 'potty?', then 'night night' and leave. I guess with him doing more of the wake-ups she has got used to a softer touch...

I'm desperate not to have two night-waking chidren at once... but I guess now is not the time of our lives for long and restful sleep...

loveisagirlnameddaisy Tue 30-Oct-12 19:23:20

Have you considered cutting down her naps? Major signs IMO that she's ready... 1) she's nearly 3. 2) she's refusing them of her own accord so she's trying to tell you she doesn't need the daytime sleep. 3) she's awake in the night and waking early in the morning.

I know you say she's clearly knackered but this is a side effect of not sleeping well at night (which is ironically caused by keeping the daytime sleep).

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