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HV said she didn't know any other 2 year olds who still got milk in the night??

(22 Posts)
bozemum Fri 07-Oct-11 13:33:07

My HV just told me she was really surprised I still gave DS milk sometimes in the night. We do this sometimes to settle him. Hes not an awful sleeper but not the best either. Normally sleeps 11 hours ish. Sometimes sleeps through, but often wakes (about 50%) of the time wanting milk, once in the night. I just give him it for an easy life. Although know that one day we might have to try and wean him off it.
But surely there must be loads of other 2 year olds getting milk in the night still? I can't imagibe we are that unusual.

worldgonecrazy Fri 07-Oct-11 13:41:59

So what if she doesn't know any other 2 year olds who get milk in the night? Is it that important that your child is the same as everyone else. If it's not bothering you then don't let her get to you.

If it is bothering you then just offer water instead of milk if your child is thirsty.

belgo Fri 07-Oct-11 13:43:00

That's because everyone lies!

My ds bf at night occasionally right up until he stopped bfing at 2 years and 9 months. But I never told my HV that!

FrillyMilly Fri 07-Oct-11 13:44:46

How much milk and is it from a bottle? DD is 2 (nearly 3) and often wakes in the night for a drink. She has a little drink of water or juice from a cup then goes straight back to sleep.

nethunsreject Fri 07-Oct-11 13:44:53

I know loads.

It is perfectly normal, as is sleeping through, adn everything in between!

If it is okay for you, then it is okay.

BerylOfLaughs Fri 07-Oct-11 13:46:04

DD would occasionally have a drink of water in the night at that age. I do think it's a little unusual and no, I don't know anyone who has told me they give their kids milk in the night at 2, but does it matter? If you don't mind and he is happy who cares?

BertieBotts Fri 07-Oct-11 14:09:16

DS did. I also lied to the HV though, because by the time he was 2, I'd sussed that if I mentioned he had milk in the night she'd be hassling me to try all manner of sleep training in order to "improve" things, when I was actually perfectly fine with how things were.

I never weaned him off it, he stopped by himself at around 2.6. Very very occasionally he has milk in the night now (age 3), if he has a bad dream, falls out of bed or wakes up for some other reason, but mostly even with these wakings he will go back to sleep by himself or if I just go in and put him back in bed/sit with my hand on him for a minute.

bozemum Fri 07-Oct-11 14:15:18

Thanks for replies. BertieBotts, this is exactly what I wanted to hear. DS did actually wean himself off milk for a few weeks a while ago. But then got ill and started wanted milk in the night again. So I'm thinking he will wean himself again at some point. The HVs are so pro sleep training. I think its better to judge your own instinct, but its hard to do this all the time. They sometimes make me doubt myself. Next time I won't tell them! I only asked cos I was worried it might be bad for his teeth, but she didn't seem too concerned about this aspect.

BertieBotts Fri 07-Oct-11 14:21:26

Make sure you brush his teeth before bed, and then only food/drink allowed is water or breastmilk, if you are worried.

Breastmilk can accelerate decay if there are other food particles in the mouth but on its own it's less harmful than other milks or drinks, because it doesn't pool in the mouth like fluids would from a bottle or beaker. Bottles are the worst for this which is why most advice centres around stopping night feeds and bottle usage after a year.

BertieBotts Fri 07-Oct-11 14:23:37

DS did get worse before he got better. I moved him into his own room because I felt we were both ready (blush) and he started waking a LOT, though was always happy to go to bed in his own bed, I even gave him the choice, I think he was just unused to waking up and being alone. I taught him to come through to my room if he wanted anything and over time it seemed that he just decided it was too much bother to get out of his cosy bed! He sleeps 12 hours now which I am shock but smile about.

Csimms Fri 07-Oct-11 14:39:47

My DS is 15 months old and since he had a chest infection a week or so ago, I have had to give him a bottle of milk in the night, just to get him to settle down to sleep again.
He has never really slept through the night and usually co-sleeps with me. I have been worrying that I am making it a habit for him to have milk in the night. Everyone I have spoke to says that I should stop and just give him water. I have tried this but it just means that neither of us getting any sleep.
I am glad to read that I am not the only one giving their son or daughter milk in the night. I guess when he is ready he will stop wanting it, as he did before he got ill.

amothersplaceisinthewrong Fri 07-Oct-11 14:44:53

MY SILS kids had bottles of milk at night (and co slept) until they were about 8 (years). Mine got nothing after three months.

nailak Fri 07-Oct-11 14:46:57

lol either she is lying or the people who do it dont tell her, or those who do it dont bother with the services of hv, is it is totally normal op

bozemum Fri 07-Oct-11 18:29:37

I'm thinking making a statement like this makes her seem a bit out of touch really. Cos although it's perhaps not the norm, it's obviously not completely abnormal either!

hardboiledpossum Fri 07-Oct-11 19:02:53

I sometimes wake up and get myself a drink or a snack in the middle of the night and I'm much older than 2.

BertieBotts Fri 07-Oct-11 20:05:22

Most HVs would benefit massively from lurking on parenting forums. Any forums, even the "hun" ones - people are much more honest when they are anonymous.

isthisweird Fri 07-Oct-11 20:09:28

I think it's unusual, don't know of any children who have milk in the night at two (or any mothers who could be arsed to provide it).

But by the sounds of this thread everyone must be lying!

Mine stopped having milk in the night at 6 months and 10 months respectively.

RhinestoneCowgirl Fri 07-Oct-11 20:11:00

DD stopped having milk in the night (bf) some time between 2 and 2.5yrs. It wasn't really anyone else's business. Our HV hasn't seen us since her 9 month check so never had any advice about sleep training.

And I know when I was on my post-natal thread with first DC there was at least one other mother giving milk in the night (bottles), so it's not unknown.

BertieBotts Fri 07-Oct-11 20:17:16

I think it is fairly uncommon if you took a cross section of all mothers. But with a thread title like this you're going to get everyone who has experienced it coming on saying "Mine did!"

I think it's probably physiologically normal, but definitely not seen as culturally normal.

Knackeredmother Fri 07-Oct-11 20:19:01

My son is nearly 2 and can feed up to ten times in the night!
I haven't seen the health visitor since he was 10 weeks old.
I seem to naturally follow attachment parenting which for some reason leaves health professionals horrified!

OneHandFlapping Fri 07-Oct-11 20:22:49

DS1 had a bottle of milk in the middle of the night pretty much every night until he was 5.

Neither Dh nor I could be bothered with the ructions if we didn't let him have it.

He is 17 now, and has lovely teeth.

reallyfuckingscared Fri 07-Oct-11 20:32:25

DS had a BF at least once most nights until well over 2. Once he'd given up (of his own accord) he still went through phases of waking up for food. A couple of oatcakes and a wee glass of water or milk and he'd crash out again. It was definitely true hunger. Your HV is clueless <broken record>

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