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please help me sleep train

(10 Posts)
freybean Mon 26-Sep-11 09:53:42

pretty please!!!

dd is 7 months now and i'm really at breaking point

we co-sleep (which i really really hate) as she suffered from reflux and thats the only way any of us managed to get any sleep

bedtime is a complete nightmare and tbh im nearly in tears trying to get her to sleep. usually start the battle about 7pm as thats when her eyes start rolling in the back of her head. but as soon as she knows she is about to fall asleep thats when she kicks off. she pinches, kicks, and screams the house down, really does anything to try and keep herself up. usually she does crash out about 8pm but then im up and down to her like a yo-yo to keep settling her. one night i might have to go up once, other nights ill lose count.

she has now got into the habbit of waking up during the night to blow raspberries. i've tried feeding her (but she isn't interested in having a bottle), rocking her, patting her, winding her, but no she is quite happy to 'talk' and mess about

for naps during the same its the same battle but she will only sleep on me after the much rocking, patting ect. its a good day when she has 2x 40mins.

i think ive tried everything moving the times when we start bedtime battle, from having quite time to trying to wear her out, giving her a bath

but i've really had enough and temped to just let her cry it out sad

StrangewaysHereICome Mon 26-Sep-11 14:06:33

Oh poor you, that sounds exhausting.

I am going through a similar thing with DS although he goes down no problem at night, it's just the middle of the night we are trying to conquer. I understand your desperation and you will probably have to let her cry it out but only in a controlled way. Suddenly withdrawing from her will only add to her frustrations. She still needs reassurance and help to settle herself. With DS I am not going the full cc route, I settle and return. So I don't pick him up, talk to him, make eye contact. I just rub his tummy until he stops crying, then I retreat. If he cries i leave him 5 mins then I go back and rub him again. This can go on a while but I have been doing it for two nights now and already have noticed a difference and he is going down better for naps.

This may work for you, but you do need to commit and be consistent and prepare yourself for a few bad nights before things improve. You'll need to follow the same routine before naps.

Don't be too upset by the pinching, kicking etc it sounds like she's just tired and frustrated. Also wearing her out before bedtime doesn't really work as they just get a bit wound up and hyper, making it harder for them to settle.

BTW I'm not an expert this is just what I am doing atm and have seen improvement already. Best of luck

pinkypig Mon 26-Sep-11 14:32:48

Strangeways we are going through similar and am going to try a bit of gentler cc tonight. Interested to hear how you get on. Our DD is 16 months.

OP good luck with what you try.


StrangewaysHereICome Mon 26-Sep-11 14:45:24

Hi Pinky DS is 6.5 months, and he has just gone down for his second nap of the day with no fuss! We'll see what tonight brings. Best of luck with your DD. I did cc with my DD when she was nearly 2 when she decided she wouldn't sleep unless I held her hand ... all night! It worked in one night, but that was a bad night <shudders just thinking about it>. She is 5 now and can still be a bit clingy at bedtime. I hope it works out for you, sleep deprivation is so hard.

freybean Mon 26-Sep-11 14:46:06

thank you

i know she doesn't mean it but it bloody hurts!

glad to hear that your getting some improvement, makes me hopeful!

fififrog Mon 26-Sep-11 19:00:42

See my post under settling a 5mo to see what we do - basically just sit with her til asleep, not tried to withdraw yet, but it works fairly well and less back-breaking than rocking or tummy patting and at least not feeding to sleep when she's not hungry!

StrangewaysHereICome Mon 26-Sep-11 20:08:05

Aw there's always hope Freybean I hope you have a much better night tonight. It won't be long before we'll have forgotten all this and be worrying aout the next thing grin

freybean Wed 28-Sep-11 13:04:47

well monday was a night from hell sad

i did leave dp to deal with her because i nearly lost my temper with her

tonight is the night that we are starting to do cc

StrangewaysHereICome Wed 28-Sep-11 14:15:19

Oh goodness poor you. This is sooooooo hard isn't it especially when they have so much stamina and you don't. Best of luck tonight - expect it to be bad , don't give up and fingers crossed next week you'll be a new woman.

Saying that the night before last DS defeated me sad I was dizzy with tiredness and he woke 5 mins after I had nodded off. I kept rubbing his tummy, he would go quiet, I would head to bed and he'd start again. It was like torture. So after an hour and a half I fed him. He did then sleep til morning. I paid for it at nap times as he screamed both times, so I didn't feed and just settled him. Last night he woke once at 1am and was asleep again in10 mins, no feeding and slept til 7. Now that is a vast improvement.

Hang in there!

freybean Wed 28-Sep-11 14:20:54

i'm trying too smile

just keep telling myself that is for the greater good

when she has had a crap night she is a grumpy sod the next day, so i know the longer i leave it the worst its going to be

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