Please help with daytime naps

[broomformychin]

My dd is 9 weeks old and will only sleep in her sling or in my arms during the day. She sleeps in her Moses basket at night, we normally manage to get her to sleep between 8-10 at night and she will then sleep til 3. We shush pat her to sleep at night but this doesn't work during the day. I feel like I've tried everything and I spend all my time thinking about how I can get her to sleep during the day and i'm starting to feel like a complete failure. On days where I try and get her to sleep in her basket she ends up barely getting any sleep and then she gets over tired and then it takes forever to settle her at night. But I can't keep her in the sling forever as she's starting to get too heavy! Will she eventually grow out of this or is it my fault for giving her bad habits?

[tethersend]

Try making it dark by putting a blanket over the hood of the basket. My DD was like a parrot- as soon as it was dark, she slept.

[SayCoolNowSayWhip]

Hi Brooms,

Tis perfectly normal for such a wee one I'm afraid. Tip for you - when she gets tired, settle down on the sofa in front of the TV with the subtitles on and just enjoy holding your sleeping baby.

My DD was exactly the same. She grew out of it! Now only sleeps in her cot which is very restrictive!

Don't listen to people who spout about rods and backs. You CAN'T spoil such a young baby. Bad habits? Pah! Just make the most of it. Good luck :)

[SayCoolNowSayWhip]

Oh and you're NOT a failure. You're an exhausted new mum and you're doing brilliantly.

[broomformychin]

Thanks say cool. I keep doubting myself as whenever my sister comes to visit she makes little comments and has even asked why I haven't just left her to cry yet which I don't really want to do. I wish I knew what to say so that they'd all stop thinking I'm useless.

[tethersend]

Oh GOD I thought it said 9 MONTHS.

Sorry... SayCool is right, completely normal at 9 weeks! In fact, getting her to sleep from 8-3 at night is amazing. Ignore and keep doing what you know is best

[SayCoolNowSayWhip]

When people told me to leave her to cry I'd just say, if you were crying would you want me to ignore you?

She's 9 weeks! She's just spent 9 months in a cosy warm place and the new world is very scary. You cannot cuddle her enough! I miss rocking my DD to sleep wriggly little monster

You sound like a fab mum, just trying to do your best. I have been there! We all have. Keep posting for support :)

[broomformychin]

I think it bothers me most because I really enjoy our cuddle time so it feels like I'm just being lazy and lounging on the settee having a lovely time looking (and smelling because I'm odd) my baby.

[SayCoolNowSayWhip]

No, no, no. You're not being lazy! I suggest you (and whoever dares to suggest otherwise) read this book

You are helping your DD sleep the best way you know how, you're bonding with her, you're showing your love for her.... These are all very important building blocks for her tiny mind. Just keep doing it.

And if you're having a rest at the same time - bonus! 9 weeks? Christ I was still dead on my feet with exhaustion at that point.

You're doing brilliantly.

[broomformychin]

Ooh I bought that recently after seeing it recommended on another thread just haven't got round to reading it yet. Thank you for the support, currently enjoying a snuggle with dd.

[Jane7]

broom - i cld have written your original post. my ds2 is exactly like yours. although he's only 8 weeks. had a go at getting him to sleep in basket for his first sleep this morning but he just fussed for 15 mins then started to cry. i honestly think he is just to yuong to settle himself in basket. does your lo stay put if you let her fall asleep in your arms and then transfer to a rocker downstairs or the basket? that's what i've been doing. sometimes it works and he stays asleep for an hour. sometimes it doesn't; he fusses so i pick him up and he goes back to sleep on me. really, i reckon you shoul enjoy cuddling him. is he your first? i'm finding it hard because i've got a toddler to run around after and it's just not practical to let my ds2 sleep on me all day so i have to either use sling or just put him down and hope for the best. thinking about it, ds1 didn't learn to settle in cot/basket for sleeps until he was about 13/14 weeks so i wldn't worry that your lo will never manage it. just keep trying, i reckon, but be relaxed if it doesn't quite work. let me know how you get on.

[broomformychin]

Hi Jane, yes at least she's my first so I can just cuddle her all day but just feel pressure from everyone as though I should be able to get her to sleep in her basket. Sometimes I try putting her in once she's asleep sometimes it'll work and sometimes it doesn't an she won't stay asleep as long as she would in my arms. But saying that it's completely different at night and she settles down quiet nicely in it. I've read your other poss Jane so know your having a hard time too, fingers crossed hopefully they'll just grow out of it

[Jane7]

I really wouldn't worry broom. With my first, I didn't even know babies were supposed to be able to go down for naps in their cots/baskets. I just assumed everyone had to wheel their babies round the park/carry them in the sling. Fact is, some babies go down quite easily in basket at the age yours is, but others take a bit longer, so really I wldn't worry about it. If she settles easily at night, that;s great. Appreciate that! I'm still trying to get ds2 down now!

[fififrog]

Will almost certainly grow out of it, though it may take a while. You will probably find a system that works for you. I have only got DD to nap in cot for the first few times in the last week, and she's just turning 6 months. There are photos that suggest she did sleep in the moses basket during the day when she was very little, but mostly she has napped in my arms, pushchair or sling, and I was able to get her to sleep lying on the bed next to me for about 2 months. She has just decided she doesn't like that, probably as she now sleeps on her tummy, and in any case it's not really safe any more as she is now rolling and wriggling like anything.

I'd give her first nap at home in my arms (or then on bed between about 10 and 23 weeks), late morning nap in pushchair, early afternoon nap in pushchair, late afternoon nap in arms on sofa or in sling. I've never been able to put her down asleep, and she has tended to wake up when the pushchair stops moving so I did a lot of walking this summer.

Now I've got her falling asleep in the cot she definitely sleeps better, and at least I can answer the door without worrying about her, now I'm just hoping she won't become too reliant on it and will still have one a day in the pushchair!

Best of luck!

[fififrog]

PS If you do find something you're happy with, I wouldn't waste effort trying to get her into the basket. I tried endlessly and just found it soul destroying when I'd jiggled her for 20 mins to get her to sleep then she woke up instantly. Much better to just accept this is how things are for now and get on with your lives and enjoy the cuddles while you can!

[AllBellyandBoobs]

Slight thread hijack... Fififrog how did you get your LO to nap in a cot? I really need to start trying with my 5.5 month old as her sleep has gone haywire and I'm wondering if it's because she's only doing 3 x 45 mins during the day (usually in her pram) so seems permanently overtired.

[MustControlFistOfDeath]

Broom Ignore your sister, your DD is far too little to be left to cry.
Agree with others, enjoy the fact that she goes down quite well at night (mine never did, still doesn't at 10mo ).
I know what you mean about smelling, I smell my DS's hair all the time.

[MustControlFistOfDeath]

Just realised I could have worded that better re the smelling thing, oh well