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dd2 and sleep!!!

(24 Posts)
CherryMonster Mon 05-Sep-11 20:50:05

she is driving me potty right now. she is 5 and goes to bed around 8-8.30pm. she is usually not asleep before 10 at the earliest, but it has been past midnight. she is in and out of her bed, and finding any excuse to call me. its driving me spare. i have 3 other kids and none of them do it, she shares with her 6 year old sister who need to be up at 7 for school (goes to special school and gets picked up at 7.45am) and she is knackered because dd2 just doesnt stop. she is otherwise stroppy and bad tempered but perfectly normal in every other way. what can i do?

CherryMonster Mon 05-Sep-11 20:52:56

she is now standing at the top of the stairs screaming at me because she has an itchy back and cant reach it. i wouldnt mind, but she has had an itchy back in the exact same spot every night at bedtime for the last 3 weeks.

southeastastra Mon 05-Sep-11 21:08:39

not much advice but i had to answer after seeing your other thread!

my ds now 17 was awful at going to bed, he would stay awake for ages and hate to be alone. it was really wearing but he (thankfully) grew out of it.

sorry not to be more useful, but i know how you feel!

Alambil Mon 05-Sep-11 21:10:03

I'd do the rapid return thing - I did it with DS age 3 and 4 and it worked well.

Well, it took 4 hours and nearly 100 returns, but it worked in 4 nights...

belledechocchipcookie Mon 05-Sep-11 21:10:54

What's your bedtime routine for her? Bath, warm milk and story and then to bed? What is she like in the morning? Easy to wake up? What time is she getting up?

thisisyesterday Mon 05-Sep-11 21:11:14

is she over-tired? needs to go to bed a bit earlier?

have you tried just saying, bed. and then not responding? letting her sleep in your bed so at least her sister can get some sleep?

would she stay in bed with a story cd to listen to?

i have to admit that after a few days of this kind of behaviour i get to the end of my tether and tell them to scratch their own back/wipe their own bum/read themselves a story etc etc and then ignore for a bit...

CherryMonster Mon 05-Sep-11 21:12:41

routine is pyjamas, milk and biscuit, teeth, bed and story whilst in bed. thats the best i can do really, i have 4 kids and 2 of them have disabilities. i dont have time to bath all of them every night. she wakes very easily, and usually between 6 and 7am

RandomMess Mon 05-Sep-11 21:14:01

I can only say that one of my dc had too much adrenalin which meant she just didn't need much sleep at all and would regularly be up 3 times per night asking if it was morning yet/

Had her treated for retained moro reflex which can cause over production of adrenalin. Absolutely fantastic cured in about 3 weeks and started going to sleep much earlier and quicker

More info here

My other 3 all slept like a dream.

keep Mon 05-Sep-11 21:15:02

Would she respond to a reward/ star chart?

CherryMonster Mon 05-Sep-11 21:15:18

i cant let her sleep in my bed, i have the tiniest room in the house, literally room for a single bed and bookcase, pus i cant leave my door open and she wont sleep in pitch dark. tried saying bed then ignoring, thats why she was standing at the top of the stairs screaming for me. dont have a cd player that they can have, only one is in my laptop, plus dd1 has AS and cant be trusted not to fiddle. not over-tired i dont think, and bed earlier really isnt an option due to home issues

heathermumof3 Mon 05-Sep-11 21:15:54

How's her mattress I got my DS 3 a new mattress and he slept a lot better and stayed there.

Also it is hard but be firm and do the straight back to bed routine no kisses or anything after the first one.

Good luck.

CherryMonster Mon 05-Sep-11 21:16:44

she has always been a great sleeper, last 6 months have been getting steadily worse.

belledechocchipcookie Mon 05-Sep-11 21:17:32

Some children are just active and find it very difficult to switch off. Any chance she could go into a room by herself? It may be helpful to speak to your HV/GP. Warm milk has a sedative effect, cold milk doesn't.

thisisyesterday Mon 05-Sep-11 21:17:51

i mean, just let her fall asleep in your room and then transfer her?

put her to bed in there with a nightlight and radio on, or cd and tell her that it's a special treat to be allowed to go to sleep in your bed and if she keeps getting out then she has to go back into her own bed?

CherryMonster Mon 05-Sep-11 21:18:16

mattress is good, tried the straight back routine and it just infuriates her more. i dont sleep well as it is, and not having chance to wind down means i dont sleep until approx 1am then up again at 7, its killing me, and also have sleep issues with ds2.

CherryMonster Mon 05-Sep-11 21:19:18

belle- there isnt space to put her in her own room, i have 3 bedrooms with me, db and 4 kids. my room is a converted cupboard/alcove and is literally 6 foot square

CherryMonster Mon 05-Sep-11 21:20:06

thisis- i wouldnt be able to lift her out of my room, i have a mattress on the floor and bad knees and arms.

Scootergrrrl Mon 05-Sep-11 21:22:07

Sometimes they get wound up because they can't get to sleep straight away. My DD is a bugger for this grin

We eventually told her it didn't matter if she didn't go straight to sleep - even if she dsnt go to sleep all night - but that she had to lie quietly in bed with her eyes closed or else. She had a quiet meditation cd for kids and that also seemed to help her drop off. Do you want me to send you a copy of it? Pm me your address if you do.

CherryMonster Mon 05-Sep-11 21:23:31

thanks scooter, but i cant put a cd on at night, dd1 cant be trusted not to fiddle, and needs to get to sleep. i dunno what i'm gonna do with her really, but will keep trying

belledechocchipcookie Mon 05-Sep-11 21:25:36

I think you need to take the no nonsence approach. Sit outside the room and keep putting her back to bed. Do not reward her with a cuddle, a scratch on her back or a kiss. I would say once 'goodnight, it's time to sleep now,' the next time just return her to bed without saying anything. It's going to take a while and it's going to piss her off but you need to stick with it, it will be worth it in the long run. I really would speak to your HV though.

heathermumof3 Mon 05-Sep-11 21:25:41

I feel your pain. I told my oldest that he had to pretend to be asleep as he shares a room with my other son. Once he pretended to be asleep he would soon fall asleep

Hope I could help more .

CherryMonster Mon 05-Sep-11 21:27:47

thanks guys, will speak to hv, although here they seem to discharge as soon as they turn 5. will persevere as dd1 really needs to get some sleep.

Scootergrrrl Mon 05-Sep-11 21:28:09

No worries.

Do you think it's an attention thing? You're spread so thinly during the day that night is the only time she can get you to herself. It sounds like you're being run ragged. What about telling her to stay quiet in bed and you'll come back and give her an extra kiss and cuddle in five minutes. Then go back, kiss, cuddle and repeat. If you can get her to lie quietly she might well drop off. The only downside is the going back in for a few times.

CherryMonster Mon 05-Sep-11 21:32:04

i hadnt thought of that scooter, although being the youngest she does get quite a lot of attention both from myself and ds1 who is very good with her. she is quite often found sitting on my lap and suchlike. will try it though. she has gone quite right now, but i dont want to go up in case she kicks off again. thank you x

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