My CC diary...

[CamperFan]

I thought I would post on here as I have found a lot of threads very helpful this week whilst deciding what to do. Last night we tried CC for the first time. Some background:
DS2 is almost 10 months and bf. He has slept through til about 5.30/6am without a feed maybe 2-3 times in these 10 months. He's had long periods when he was younger of only having one feed in the night, but also long periods of being fed 3-4 times! He shared my room, and most nights my bed, until 8 months, when he moved to his own room without any change/drama. I have demand fed from the beginning, although we slipped into a routine, and he's not a "boob monster" at all, since starting on solids. When he moved into his room, he was generally on one feed a night, which I was happy to continue with, but since then it has got worse again; nothing else will settle him and I have been feeding him roughly 3 times per night, which I'm finding exhausting and have been questioning whether to stop bfing altogether. If we try to settle him another way, the crying gets worse.

So, last night, after much reading and consideration we thought we would give CC a go. Partly because I really want to stop the night feeds and nothing else will settle him anyway, so he is going to cry no matter what; partly because DS1 didn't sleep through til he was 3 yo and the thought of another 2 years of this fills me with dread. We almost caved within the first 3 minutes!! It was like he knew what was going to happen because he started screaming as soon as he woke up. This was at 22.10 last night. We went in at 5 min intervals (decided not to increase it), and walked in saying "shush" gently, patted him and said "Sleepy time baby Camper" (we decided beforehand that we couldn't not touch him at all as the book recommended), then walking out quickly. He did scream and scream and cough, but after about 15 mins, it turned into indignant shouting, getting less and less. After 22.50, there was silence. So actually only 40 minutes, which I was hugely relieved by. The next wake up was not until 3.30am. I went in after 5 mins (I think, I may have rushed in a bit too soon here as was confused). Left the room and crying stopped after 3 mins! Next wake up was 6am, and we decided that 6am is fine to be morning, brought him into bed and fed him. Hurrah! He never usually feeds first thing as he has filled up at night. It was the first time he has not been fed in the night for months. And not only that, but he went to sleep without patting or stroking or anything.

So right now I am very happy, although of course tonight could be completely different. And it does go against my instincts as a mother. But our experiences with DS1 drove us crazy, so if DS2 can become a better sleeper now then we'll all benefit. And I am happy to keep on bfing, which is another important factor. I will update tomorrow if anyone is interested!

[CountBapula]

That sounds great, CamperFan. It must have been really tough to do, but (as you can imagine) I totally sympathise on the night feeding/sleep deprivation front!

Hope night 2 goes OK.

[TheresAHuppoInMyHouse]

Hi CamperFan well done, it must be a great relief to have seen some results. When they're crying the first time, and you don't know when it's going to stop, it's really hard. I use the same technique for DD when she won't settle, (I leave three minute intervals, and like you, give a comforting touch too), and it's never gone on for longer than 40 mins or so.

I found it's not a permanent solution though (if only), for instance this week she slept through properly for 3 nights, and then the last 2 nights still woke at 12ish and 4ish. Hey ho.

Good luck for tonight, here's to more sleep!

[SleepDeprivedGrumpyBum]

Watching with interest camper. I've just posted about my issues with Ds' sleep. My only concern with CC is that if Ds still wakes every couple of hours for the first couple of nights with it (his typical nights for the past few months) and wont resettle easily then I'm going to get even less sleep. I know in the long term it may be worth, but I'm back at work 3 nights a week until 11pm and i'd really struggle to cope on any less sleep at the moment.

[CamperFan]

Thanks for the support. So, last night was fairly similar, if not easier. Ds2 woke at 11pm, and we went in at 5 min intervals until 11.20, when all was quiet. He then sleep until 4.45. I was a bit worried about him waking at this time, with it being closer to morning and wondering what would happen if he just did not go back to sleep as it would be time for a morning feed. Not sure what to do when this happens. Anyway, that didn't happen and he went back to sleep after 35 mins. We had to wake him at about 7.15am. The crying was definitely less intense than last night. It still feels a bit wrong, but I am convinced that that its the right thing to at least try.

sleepdeprived, what do you currently do? I have found that i haven't actually had any less sleep, perhaps more even in the last two nights than in the preceding 3 for example, when I was getting up to feed him 3 times, settling him back in cot, etc.

[SleepDeprivedGrumpyBum]

Sounds like it's definately going in the right direction for you camper!

At the moment Ds has a feed then a bath then we go and sit in his room and read a book and sing some nursery rhymes until he's sleepy. I did a version of PU'PD with him where every time he sat up i'd lay him back down until he settles off to sleep, so thats now how he goes to sleep. He was doing quite well with it and going straight off so i was going to work on moving out of the room bit by bit; but then i went back to work 3 evenings a week and because he doesn't settle very well for DP Dp has to get him to sleep by any means possible.

For the first few wake ups (anywhere from 1-5) before i go to bed i manage to resettle him using the same technique, laying him down and sometime rubbing his back if he's struggling a bit with teeth or a cold like at the moment. I've been doing a dream feed before i go to bed, not really because i think he'a hungry, mainly because I hope it sort of resets his sleep cycle IYSWIM and i'll get at least two hours.

Basically when he wakes when i'm in bed i end up co sleeping with him, usually from around 12/1 ish. Then he's still waking every couple of hours and usually latches himself on whilst im just stirring the cheeky bugger.

So the thought of even say 40 minutes of crying every 2 hours on the first night is what's put me of CC for a while. That and i have a sneaky suspicion that DS just wouldn't get it.

[CamperFan]

Well night 3.... It was very interesting! Basically, he only woke once between 7-7, and this was at 2am. Instead if immediately wailing, he grizzled a bit, chatted a bit (never does this). He was awake for about an hour, which is longer than the other 2 nights, difference being that we only went in 3 times instead of every 5 mins because it just wasn't necessary to go in. Infact we only went in to check he wasn't sitting up/stuck, etc and each time he was happy to be helped back down, had a little drink of water, etc.

So by 3am all was silent and he woke at 6.50am! I can't think that it is coincidence! I am feeling hopeful, but don't want to jump the gun. But if it is really working then I so wish we had done it with DS1!! will update tomorrow.

How old is your DS grumpy?

[Cbell]

Watching this thread with interest. Thank you for sharing

[SleepDeprivedGrumpyBum]

He's a similar age to your Ds, he'll be 10 months at the start of September. I've been relatively patient because of all the developmental stuff he's had going on; but like i said in my other thread it feels like it's very easy to make excuses for his poor sleep (rather than address it i suppose ) as he's always had something going on such as teething or learning new skills since about 4.5 - 5.5 months old which is when his sleep started to go down hill.

I'm really impressed with how your CC experience has gone though . It's definately given me some reassurance that it can work. I'll just have to see if DP and I can work up the courage to implement it together.

[CamperFan]

OK, night 4 - the best night we have had for months, possibly ever, seeing as I didn't need to feed him (not that I have ever resented feeding him in the night, just getting frustrated with 3 times a night!). He didn't make a squeak until 5am, and all was silent within 15 mins, back to sleep til after 7am! In those 15 mins I went in once, though the little bit of crying he did was just grizzling really, but I wanted to check he wasn't sitting up. He was on his front again, just popped him on to his side and that was it. I was so happy, especially as I had gone out last night and was worried about my mum doing the CC thing, and I rarely go out because I never know how many times I'll be up in the night!

So far this has been an amazing success - we basically had about 1hr 30 mins of crying over 2 nights, which can easily happen anyway, and 2 nights of virtual self settling. After bfing in the night for so long, and endless back stroking, etc I just can't believe it. Still not jumping the gun - it could all change tonight and obviously illness and teething etc could set us back at some point, but right now I am pretty happy!

[NoWuckingFurries]

That sounds great camper - my DS is only 4.5 months so too young for CC but its good to know for future reference (as if all these night wakings continue, I may lose my mind).

Good luck for tonight!

[caesar04]

Hello Camperfan

So glad I have found this thread, re-started CC last night with DD, almost 9 months. She too was bfed in night and waking 2/3 even 4 times recently. Also had good periods of only 1 feed and just like you I was ok with that but it had just gotten ridiculous.

I had a failed attempt last week, did 2 nights ok, 1st cried for an hour, 2nd for 40 mins but then slept till 7am both nights...fab.

But then we went away for a few days (no idea why I thought this was a good plan to start cc the week we were away in a caravan ...think I so was desperate, we had an awful week before). So she was in a travel cot with us and DS (3) next door, all went wrong as it was SO much harder to ignore her when she in the room and then DS woke up crying...so ended up co-sleeping and bfing...oops.

So gave up till we got home and then started again last night. Have also decided to stop bfeeding too, was only feeding her during night and in the morning and back at work in 2 weeks, and she has been biting me ALOT ouch!

It was worse than before . she was on/off for about 45 mins from 2.30am...could handle it fine but then about 3.20am she got completely hysterical, wouldn't settle then I started crying so DH took over and picked her up!

She did calm right down and then he passed her to me, I put her down awake but calm, was fully expecting more tears but she went off by herself and slept till 7am. DS woke her up by shouting us from his room this morning. she was gurgling and chatting as well this morning, also never happened before.

She has gone down without a murmur tonight.

Feeling shit about cocking up last week as I have put her through all the tears for nothing so think I am going to find it hard again tonight.

[CamperFan]

caesar, poor you, it must be really hard to have a regression like that as you sort of feel like you owe it to them to carry on once you have started! We have friends coming this weekend and my original plan was to put DS2 in the travel cot in our room so that my friends can have 2 rooms, but there is no way I can do that now - they will have to use the playroom downstairs. So you don't know what happens after 4 nights then, as I have read that it can be great first of all, then a few test nights??

nowucking, yes I agree 4.5 months too young. And perhaps your DS will be much better by the time he is 10 months! grumpy yes you def need your DP onboard too.

[caesar04]

no not got past 2 nights yet.But my sister did it and took her DD 4 nights to sleep through and no regression there.

And yes I really felt rubbish messing up. You can no way have DS in with you in a cot, its was really awful having her in with us.

I noticed its your DS2, what was Ds1 like? My DS was an absolute dream, slept through at 10 WEEKS!! So I have no frame of reference at all. So much for DC2 being easier...erm NO!


I think it is working overall, she actually slept through on Sat night with no help from anyone...was amazed when I heard her cry and looked at clock which said 5.50am but then all went pear shaped on Sunday, she woke at 4.30am and didn't go back to sleep!!

Hence the starting CC again last night.

THe thing I find trickiest is that she'll go quiet for up to 10 even 15 mins sometimes then start up again? It was after a quiet 12 mins that she got inconsolable last night.

And it was just as I got back into bed after hovering outside her room, then was sitting on our bed for a bit...literally just as I snuggled down under the cover she started!!

Think she knew I was getting comfy??

[caesar04]

Whoops... just re-read your OP and saw your DS1 didn't sleep through till 3 yo.

I see why you wanted to do it now!

[caesar04]

Grumpy
My DH has been invaluable esp as I have also stopped bf. she calms quicker for him I think.

[Adair]

Read this with interest and hurrah for your sleep success! Am getting thoroughly fed up with my 7mth old bf baby, have always been the co-sleeping/feed to sleep type but just well, think he needs to learn to sleep on his own. Maybe. Ds went from fed-to-sleep to sleeping through quite quickly, perhaps ds2 will get there eventually a bit later (dd is another story!!). But want to be able to comfort him without him ggrabbing for my boobs.

I tried to let him cry today - he cried for aaaages i was right there - maybe I should leave and come back but 5 minutes crying alone seems like forever to me. Question - are your babies moving./etc. Cos I do leave mine a bit (what with two other dc) if I leave mine lying down in the cot (sleepy!), after a few mins he is up and standing at the side or crawling round looking for me!! In the early days, he would be wedged up in the corner of the cot. And the other day he had his chubby leg stuck. So do I just ignore all this? Or just lie him back down when I come in?

Am so clueless about how he will go from screaming to sleep. it doesn;t seem very logical to me but I appreciate I have never been good at this 'get-your-baby-to-sleep' thing.

Any help appreciated!

[caesar04]

Hi Adair

My DD is also a wriggler and was an early crawler and stander so she is often to be found stood up or sat up.

I just lie her down on her side with a blankie/teddy (or 3!) and her dummy while shushing her and rubbing her back. She usually settles right down.

you can choose the length of time to go back and check, usually doubling it each time.

eg 1 min, 3 min, 6 min then back to 1 min.

I've done 2 min, 4 min and 8 min.

I used the advice in thisOP... but be warned...the rest of thread descends into bun fight/debate about CC though!

It's tough to do and wasn't a decision I made lightly...my reason were:
Totally knackered...obviously!
Back to work 4 days a week in Sept and could not function when I did 3 weeks before end of last term, felt like I was in a complete daze.
DD stopped sleeping well when co sleeping, was waking me and DH up every few hours.
Wanted to stop night feeds, DD would always try and grab me if I was picking her up to comfort her so caved every time.

I am really hoping for a break through this week with consecutive nights of sleeping thru.

Ooo..I have just heard her cry out once and she has gone back to sleep herself, a few weeks ago I would have had to go up Hurray!

[Adair]

Thanks Caesar for the 'idiots guide' !!
See, I don't think ds will settle with shushing and patting (no dummy either- I tried as dd had one and it was fab) but might give it a go tomorrow. He is next to me, am going to try and do some baby steps I think - so just focusing on not feeding him every time he snuffles. He just woke and crawled over but went to sleep with some shushing and cradling- small success.

Not sure if it's right for us at this time (the kids were so upset by hearing him cry tonight ), but nice to have a bit more idea of what we could try...

[CamperFan]

I am just so excited that I had to post first thing. We did not have to settle DS2 last night! He woke briefly at 1am and went back to sleep himself within 10mins until 6.50am!!! I just can't believe it.

Adair, he does get into sitting position or on his front, and I always rearrange him. No standing as yet, I am sure that will be a problem when it happens.

We really haven't had much crying at all and he hasn't work DS1 once. I am in shock!

[caesar04]

Good news Camperfan, he must have been so ready for a full nights kip. Was he crying for those 10 mins?

I am v

Although not too bad here, slept till 4am, went in shushed and dummy then went back till 5.15am.......and still awake!!

I find that 5am time v hard cos she's not so sleepy, maybe a bit peckish and am worried she's going to wake DS who can easily get up at 6am if so inclined

But overall not too bad. Seems she will either wake during night 2/3am and then sleep till 7 or get up at 5am!

Might have to cut back daytime sleep??? what do you think?

[CamperFan]

No, he wasn't crying- grizzling sounds for a few seconds a couple of times, but not enough to go in.

How much sleep does your DD have during the day? I can't believe your DS slept through from 10 weeks - you deserve to have a far,far worse sleeper than your DD!

[caesar04]

I truly did not know how lucky I was however he's made up for it since...the two's were indeed terrible!!! DS was 5 weeks early so spent some time in incubator and he had to be fed every 2/3 hours so he was always happy to sleep in basket then his cot and we had a routine from the start.

DD on the other hand hated being alone and was a boob monster! Such different babies.

DD currently has short nap in morning anything from 30 mins to an hour and longer after lunch, usually between 1.5 and 2 hours. I suspect I might need to cut the morning one back a bit. But that's my 'getting ready for the day' time!

The hard thing is that there seems to be no fathomable reason for the night wakings, no matter what I do in the day she still wakes up.

They are both asleep now, DS has pretty much dropped his nap but we've been for a long walk and picnic this morning so we are all knackered.

Going to have a cuppa and snooze if I can...

[CamperFan]

OK, a midnight waking, went in once to help put him back on his side, back to sleepin less than 10 mins, no crying. Slept til 6.30am .

Caesar, those naps don't sound excessive - some sleep more than others- but it is more than my DS2. He generally has 1 hour in the morning (I wake him after an hour), and another hour after lunch (wakes himself). I remember my DS1 did not sleep for more than hour after lunch until he dropped his morning nap (around 11/12 months I think), and generally it would then be more like 1.5-2 hours.

[caesar04]

Wow don't want to jinx it but sounds like he's really got it sorted. Brilliant.

We had another 2.30am wake up, varying degrees of tears on and off for 40 mins but really not too upset, I/DH went in 4 times to settle then lovely silence for 15 mins, thought she had gone back to sleep.. but then....a hysterical fit of crying ??? Then went back till 7am.

Although DS woke up at 5.30am this morning..no idea why so still totally knackered today.

I was at work today (results day...awful don't ask..) and chatting to my friend about it, her kids are teenagers now but she said it took her DS 10 DAYS to sleep through!!!

Really hope it doesn't take that long. She also said I might be over the worst of it.

Will check in 2morrow x

[caesar04]

And I agree about the naps ...clutching at straws!!!