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Dealing with pressure for dd to sleep in own room.

14 replies

CrumblyMumbly · 25/07/2011 23:03

My dd is 10mo and sleeps in her cot in our bedroom. She usually sleeps through the night, though is teething so has been a bit unsettled recently. Comes into our bed for cuddle in morning or to get her back to sleep. My mil and other older relatives are very put out by the fact dd is not in her own room and are continually asking about if nursery is ready/when is she going in. My dp works nights and mentioned that he is briefly awoken in the morning which gave mil even more ammunition to attack me with (dp scared of her!) I like having her in with us (yes pfb and only child due to my advanced age) and am in no hurry to chuck her in a nursery regardless of rod for back/mollycoddling and never sleep again comments. Any ideas of things to say to them (other than the obvious...)

OP posts:
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plantsitter · 25/07/2011 23:04

I would refuse to discuss it with anyone other than DP actually.

If you really have to, though, wouldn't 'it' working for us' and changing the subject do?

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RitaMorgan · 25/07/2011 23:14

I wouldn't discuss it either. I'm not sure my mum even knows where ds sleeps.

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slartybartfast · 25/07/2011 23:16

dont know what to say. i moved all of mine at 6 months, it was recommended somewhere. plenty move earlier and you havent moved yours yet.

ignore their comments.

do you have a plan btw?

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MJHASLEFTTHEBUILDING · 25/07/2011 23:17

This reply has been deleted

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Valpollicella · 25/07/2011 23:19

Tell MIL that you have put her in her own room. She won't know Wink

Do what works for you and DP (and DD of course), not what you're pressured into doing

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FriggFRIGG · 25/07/2011 23:33

my 10 month old sleeps,not just in our room but, normally,
In Our Bed!Shock
and not just that,but he is sleeping right here on my lap,and i'll take him up to bed with me when i go Shock horror.

i do not discuss his sleeping arrangements with anyone but DP.
and you dont have to either.

if they ask either lie,
tell them it's none of their business
or
tell them that you are HAPPY doing it your way,and to BUTT OUT.

its not a rod for your back BTW,we did it this way with DD,and she moved in to a big bed,in her own room without ever spending a single night in a cot,she moved at 20 months,was happy as could be to move,we told her she could come back in if she wanted too,she never has.

except in the morning,when she gets in to snuggle with her brother Smile

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Valpollicella · 25/07/2011 23:36

How lovely Frigg Grin

Yep, I think lying is the way forward here

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FriggFRIGG · 25/07/2011 23:44

Grin
'tis lovely aksherley...i did get a toe up my nose though the other night,DS had done a 360 turn in the bed and was wriggling his foot in my face!
DD though it was hilarious!

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Valpollicella · 25/07/2011 23:47

No, seriously, I think it's great...DS still gets into bed with me in the middle of the night and he's 5...he is very stealthy Grin

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CrumblyMumbly · 25/07/2011 23:50

Thanks very much for your input. I'm bumbling along as a new parent and my confidence in my ability is sometimes chipped away by 'those who know better'. I feel geared up to face them again now.
Yes I have a plan slartybartfast - maybe a birthday move...not saying which birthday Grin

OP posts:
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Valpollicella · 25/07/2011 23:54

I heard a great saying the other day OP, which might stand you in good stead the next time you get told well meaning advice...

Opinions are like arseholes, everyone has them Wink

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FriggFRIGG · 26/07/2011 00:03
Grin
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BaronessBomburst · 26/07/2011 00:05

My DM does this too. DS is 17 months and still in with us. So what? She also goes on about potty training and today told me that I should pull my finger out and make some flash cards so I could start him reading. I pointed out that in the 70's they'd have started potty training and flash cards in utero if only someone had invented a folding potty to stuff up your fanjo..... It shut her up. although I doubt it will be for long Grin

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gillybean2 · 26/07/2011 00:08

Ignore them. Do what is right for you.

I would just laugh and joke at with her and say how old fashioned she is to hold that view and how things have changed. Or lie, as suggested above, that would work too!

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