New mum - too anxious to sleep. Help!

[BPrincess]

Can anyone help?

First week or two I was ok. Got some sleep, slept when she slept etc. But now I go to bed and can't find sleep, try to sleep when she does and nothing happens. Been like this for a few weeks now (she's 7 weeks now) and I'm getting to the end of my tether. Been using nytol and night nurse, but I know that's not good. I put my earplugs in yet I'm constantly alert to any teeny cry (even though my partner is more than capable of doing a couple of night feeds in another room - we are FF), and I often have a knot of anxiety in my stomach that makes it doubly hard to sleep.

If only I could sleep!!!! Help!

[bumbums]

Don't want to sound dramatic but this could be a sign of Post Natal Depression. Have you told your GP or health visitor how you feel?
What is it you imagine will happen to your baby if you allow yourself to relax? Try a check list of things to ensure before you try to sleep. She's fed, comfortable and asleep. You roughly know when she'll next need you and untill then you are free. What about if your Mum came to stay. Would you feel more relaxed then?

[Iggly]

Are you sleeping near her? I only ask because when DS was tiny, I couldn't sleep very well unless he was right next to me otherwise I'd lie there straining to hear every noise. Once he was next to me - I relaxed. Even being in his cot arms length away was too far!!

[BPrincess]

Ah, yes, I have also been diagnosed with PND and am on meds for it - been on them for a week. Perhaps the meds will lower my anxiety levels, do you think?

I will def try the checklist, thanks bumbums Oh, and my mum has been staying, too!

Maybe I should try the co-sleeping.. though she snuffles so much I wonder if I'd sleep at all!

Thanks for the responses.

[Iggly]

You don't have to cosleep - you could try having the cot right next to your bed?

[HappyAsASandboy]

I was the opposite to Iggly!

I found that sleeping in the same room as them (twins), I was "the responsible adult" and so slept very lightly and jumped to every snuffle. One night (and sadly, one night only), my Mum stayed in the bedroom with the twins and I slept in the spare room (far enough away to not be able to hear them!). I slept soundly in between feeds, when Mum brought them in to me, waited while I fed them and then took them away again to settle them. I am sure I slept soundly because I had handed the baton over to someone I knew could take care of them, and I was no longer "the responsible adult".

Occassionally, my Mum takes them for a few hours now, and despatches me off to bed. I don't get any longer to sleep, but I still sleep so so much better if I am not "the responsible adult"

Maybe try that if you have someone you truely trust enough?

Good luck, and try to take solacy in the fact that eventually you'll be so knackered you could sleep anywhere

[Angel786]

If you're awake because of anxiety I found Paul mckennas I can make u sleep cd or ituney thing really useful to help me drift off, couldn't always keep me asleep tho, have had insomnia since childhood...

[Iggly]

That's interesting Happy - I couldn't sleep with DS in the same room unless he was right next to me. Hearing shuffles and not knowing if DS was awake or not drove me mad - once he was next to me I could relax I also slept fine if DH took him but was more rested from co-sleeping as I never had to wake properly to feed. Much harder with twins I guess!

[BPrincess]

Have just downloaded the Paul McKenna cd - thanks for the suggestion. Sadly, even when I know she's with DP/mum I can't sleep

[narmada]

What medication are you on for the PND, OP?

If it's one of the SSRIs (seroxat, paroxetine, lustral/sertraline, prozac, citalopram all fall into this category) they can give you insomnia/ sleep disturbance in the short term. It should wear off after a few weeks on them, and you will likely find yourself sleeping better when they take effect. They can also cause a temp increase in anxiety levels too, but this should taper off the longer you take them.

If it's unbearable, there are other anti-ds you can try that are more sedating (e.g., mirtazapine).