5 month old... waking every 45 minutes at night

[BornSicky]

help, please!

here's my baby's patterns for the last few weeks for sleeping. He's EBF on demand. where am i going wrong and what can i do to help him get better sleep?

Also, any ideas/support for ways to help him self-settle?

Sleeping pattern and routine (baby led, not me enforcing)

wakes 8am, feed, plays then
naps at 9am for 30 mins
9.30am feeds - wash, dress etc
11am naps for 45 mins feed before
2pm feed
3.30pm naps for 45 mins
5.30pm feed
6.15pm bath, massage, nappy change, story/singing
7pm sleep
7.45pm wakes - feed to sleep
8.45pm wakes - feed to sleep
9.45pm wakes - feed to sleep
10.45pm wakes - feed to sleep
11.45pm wakes - feed to sleep
2.30am - wakes - feed to sleep
5am - wakes - feed to sleep
7am - wakes - feed to sleep

I don't always feed to sleep, sometimes manage to cuddle him back to sleep.

We co-sleep, but i always try and put him down in his cot first. at the 2.30am wake I tend to bring him into bed with me.

I'm totally exhausted and especially worn down by his inability to transition from light sleep to deep sleep in the evening.

Any help, very gratefully received!

[gentlemantobed]

Literally EXACTLY what we went through back in Jan when our DS was 5mths.
Everyone has opinions but what we did was right for us - Moved into own room and then started controlled crying.
Broke the 40 min wake-ups immediately and started getting 2-3 hour stretches again.
These have gradually lengthened and now at 10 months sleeps 7pm-4am, then BF and sleeps for another hour - so yes, we're up for the day by 5.30am, but at least he's sleeping for up to 9 hours in a row at night now.
The controlled crying still has to happen on put down some nights - not every night though - that doesn't make it easier - it still feels horrible to do but has been worth it.

[RuByMaMa]

This sounds so familiar to me too BornSicky... We co-slept with our DD until she was about 5 months. First 5 months was fine, but then she seemed to start getting restless and started waking every hour or so as well... I thought it was a sign that she was ready to have a bit more distance from us at night and so moved her into her cot but pushed right up next to my side of the bed and gradually moved it further and further away. At 6months we moved her into her own room which was so tough at first and for the first couple of weeks she didn't sleep through, but then one night, she went down at 7.30 and then slept 'til 6.15!! She was also EBF and usually fed off to sleep too... When she was waking in the night at this time, I would try to just give her the dummy (if you don't use one, you could try introducing DS to his thumb) and place my hands on her and maybe stroke her back gently too. I also had one of those 'running water' cd's you can purchase off Amazon and would usually play it on cd on repeat next to her on a really low volume.

I really do feel for you. It's just such a hard time, and I found it so difficult, especially as I'd speak to my friends from antenatal who would all tell me about their 'wonderful' little sleepers whilst I was waking every hour. Looking at your post, it seems like he has a fantastic daytime routine and I think it's just a developmental thing. I feel really strongly that babies should be 'taught' to sleep well as opposed to being 'trained', but it really is a personal choice, and when you're suffering from chronic sleep deprivation you'll try anything!

[RitaMorgan]

Mine did exactly the same at 5 months - I stopped feeding to sleep, moved him into his own room and limited night feeds to every 4 hours (7/11/3/7). DP rocked/cuddled him to sleep at bedtime and dealt with any waking between feeds. Didn't take more than a week til ds was only waking for feeds.

[bigkidsmademe]

I had this too. Essential for us too was stopping feeding to sleep and ALWAYS putting him in his cot awake. Took a while till he learnt to self soothe (we didn't leave to cry but cuddled, stroked, sang to him in the cot. Soon he was only waking for feeds, then we gradually night weaned and now he sleeps through!

[BornSicky]

thanks all.

he's very clingy for cuddles at the moment, so falling asleep in my arms alot! his daytime naps are good and getting better/more of a routine.

I'm going to try and teach him to self-settle this week. preparing myself for some sleepless nights.

[SanneSannes]

BornSicky our DS woke up every 45 minutes as well for 3 months (starting when he was 3 months old). We tried all possible non cry solutions but nothing seemed to have any effect...and by the way I have never fed him to sleep. we then came to a point when DS was visibly sleep deprived (needless to say so were we!) and we decided to try controlled crying - something that I have always been against...result: he is able to self - settle in less than 5 minutes, only wakes up once for a feed since then, seems a lot happier and certainly well rested. Also, the longest he cried was the first evening for 30-very long-minutes. On the second day he didn't cry at all in the evening and only for ca 2 minutes (which still feels like an eternity) at nap time. No crying at all since day 3 (we are now at day 11, so hope Im not cheering too early). I have been thinking a lot about how this could have possibly worked for our DS ....maybe he was actually disturbed by us and could never enter a deep sleep phase due to our constant efforts to rock, pat, sush, sing, etc. him to sleep whilst all he wanted to do was to quietly doze off by himself??? Its all a mistery to me but it seems to have worked. Wishing you good luck for the coming nights!