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23 weeks and getting worse and worse!

(10 Posts)
igetmorelovefromthecat Mon 03-Jan-11 23:31:10

DD2 is 23 weeks and co-sleeps with me. She is EBF. She has never been great at sleeping unless I am with her, so she was just staying up until I went to bed. Recently she has started going to bed at about 9ish. The ONLY way I can get her to sleep is by lying down with her and feeding her. She won't self-settle, believe me I have tried!

So she gets to bed at about 9pm, then between then and me going to bed at about midnight usually she will wake about every 20 mins, and just want me to feed her for a couple of mins until she is back to sleep. Then once I am in bed she wakes usually about 6 (ish) times during the night for more milk.

She was sleeping through for 6 or 7 hours when she was a couple of months old so what is happening now? I don't get any kind of evening to myself or a proper night's sleep and she is very clingy and demanding during the day (putting her down/not giving her my full attention is NOT allowed, apparently!).

Any ideas would be greatly appreciated!

ilovemyhens Mon 03-Jan-11 23:36:44

Have you introduced any solids at all? Sounds like she's hungry to me. She shouldn't be feeding six times during the night. What age are you planning on starting some weaning foods?

igetmorelovefromthecat Mon 03-Jan-11 23:42:55

Yeah have just started...am trying BLW and she has eaten some banana and carrot so far. But as it's BLW I'm not sure how much is being swallowed/digested. Do you think it's worth feeding her some baby rice/pulped something or another to fill her up? And if so what time of day?

ilovemyhens Mon 03-Jan-11 23:55:49

I'd be feeding her some baby rice/cereal first thing in the morning and at suppertime as well. She needs something on her stomach and carbohydrates will calm her down and give it something to work at. If she's only having milk and some fruit/veg, that's not enough.

Their energy requirements change at about this age and they need some foodstuffs. I'd never heard of blw when I had my two (12&6), so just did what I thought was best and never had any problems. I started them off on the baby purees/mixes and just went from there.

Try and make sure she has a good supper.

Clingy and demanding? I had one like that, but I'd just give him lots of stuff to look at whilst he rolled around on the floor. Give reassurance every few mins, but don't be giving in too much, or she'll be playing you.

Does she have a music/light show box on the side of her cot? Mine had these and they loved them. It would give them something to distract them whilst they nodded off.

You might not like the idea, but a dummy can be useful for a 'sucky' baby who needs something to comfort them. My ds1 refused to take one, but ds2 loved his. It can be a bit of a nuisance when they start falling out of their mouths during the night. Mine used to have about 4 scattered in his cot.

Anyway, perhaps try a bit more food and see how you get on.

igetmorelovefromthecat Tue 04-Jan-11 00:26:18

Thanks for that advice, my DD1 is 6 and BLW was unheard of then, so I did the whole puree thing with her. Mind you she would sleep 12-14 hours without waking at all from 8 weeks so none of this was an issue.

DD2 is my punishment for all the wrongs I have done grin. Just as well she is cute.

She has never slept in a cot but does have a soft toy with music and lights. She doesn't think much of it!

Tried the dummy when she was very little but she wouldn't take it, haven't tried since but may be worth a go.

Will try some baby rice tomorrow and see how I get on. The main problem seems to be getting her to stay asleep when I am not there, as soon as I leave the room she wakes up every 20 mins or so, there is no way she can be hungry every 20 mins!

DesperateHousewife20 Tue 04-Jan-11 08:41:14

This sounds just like my ds, he is nearly 26 weeks, I have started solids for a couple of weeks now, mainly BLW but with some spoon feeding i.e soup.

He sleeps about 5 or 6 hours when we first go to bed but once he has woken up at say 2am he usually only goes back to sleep for 2ish hours at a time.

It is really tough and like you say he slept 7 hours when he was around 2 months so I know he can do it.

I have to lie down and feed him to sleep, I try to do this around 9pm aswell so I get some evening just me and DP but like your DD he can often wake every 20mins.

igetmorelovefromthecat Tue 04-Jan-11 10:14:14

I feel your pain DeperateHouswife! The only way I can get DD to sleep is by lying down and feeding her.

I have no idea how I am ever going to get her into a cot (I can't fit in there with her to get her to sleep!). She has never slept in it even during the day. If she falls asleep in my arms the instant I put her down she wakes up. I also have no idea how I am going to be able to stop breastfeeding (not that I am planning to yet), as if I had to give her a bottle every time she wakes up for one of her snacks I would be up all night!

DesperateHousewife20 Tue 04-Jan-11 11:39:21

Sometimes during the day he will sleep by being rocked (even other people can do it, thank god!)

DS has never slept in his cot either, apart from ONE time after his jabs, it must have made him very sleepy.

DP keeps saying 'he'll change, hes only 6 months. He'll be totally different by a year' but I keep thinking surely its only going to get worse, he'll rely on me to get him to sleep more and more and Ill end up sleeping with him in his bed when hes 3!

Im hoping when he is more established on solids he wont want breastfeeding as much.
I think when I can tell him 'no more boob' and he understands it might be easier, who knows.

Albrecht Tue 04-Jan-11 15:25:15

My ds is quite similar with the frequent wakings, can't be put down etc. If he wakes within 30 mins I burp him and often that seems to be the issue rather than hunger. Once or twice he has even fallen asleep with the patting... only to wake as soon as he is put down again...

Sometimes I feel a bit hopeless that he will never go to sleep on his own or amuse himself.

The Fussy Baby by Dr Sears made me feel a bit better though - he says basically some babies need more from you and if you try and give them what they need, they will become more content and eventually do things when they are ready.

I'd also recommend not looking at the time when they wake in the night - somehow makes it easier to accept.

DesperateHousewife20 Tue 04-Jan-11 15:32:22

Just got back from the hv and she basically said dont co-sleep. Instead feed him, put him in the cot awake and do CC (although she didnt use the words CC)

Now I really dont know what to do confused

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