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wakes up a million times every night (well it feel like it!!)

(22 Posts)
whatsleep Wed 10-Nov-10 10:55:26

ok, so baby is 6.5 months old, happy during the day, amuses self when im not in the room etc but night time is a totally different story. Settles of to sleep ok, put her down in her cot awake, dummy in, music on...she cries out a few times but nothing major, then off to sleep on her own (i am in the room but she cant see me) she will then wake approx 2 hours later needing her dummy, then again about every 30 - 60 minutes until i looses my will to live and put her in bed with me. her cot is next to my bed so she can see me but will only sleep for a long period with her head on my pillow next to me. i even tried lifting her asleep into her cot with the pillow still under her head, she started crying immediatly.....please help me I am so desperate to get my pillow back to myself!!

Teaandcakeplease Thu 11-Nov-10 09:52:52

You could try shush/ pat from the baby whisperer book when she wakes? Or put a few more dummies around her head, so she can find one if she wakes having lost it?

Do you feed her everytime she wakes? Or just put her dummy in again? She may sleep better in her own room once she got used to it as well. My two did. Mine woke at 11pm, 3am and 5 or 6am until about 9 months tbh. If they woke at other times I tried not to feed them personally, unless they were ill. If I thought they were teething I always offered bonjela teething gel before settling to sleep. As I wanted to be sure they weren't in pain. Also sometimes at developmental milestones it does interfere with their sleep and they wake more for a short while. It can be frustrating at the time but as the old mumsnet mantra goes "this too shall pass"

I know people have removed the dummies at this age as they felt it was causing more problems with them settling and staying asleep. I was too chicken and did the dummy fairy at age 3 as I couldn't face the tears before that. Except it was horrendous at age 3 as well I found.

Alternatively you give up and co sleep every night for a few more months and then sleep train her then? grin Whatever you do you need to be consistent and not give in wink

This book is excellent

This post is terribly rambling and a whole bunch of ideas but hopefully some of it may help smile

AngelDog Thu 11-Nov-10 10:13:20

If it's new, it could be to do with the start of separation anxiety.

She may wake because she needs the dummy and music again to get back off at the start of every sleep cycle. The No Cry Sleep Solution has some good suggestions for this.

If she dosn't nap well during the day, overtiredness could be part of the problem.

I'd second the book recommendation above - but I loathe & despise his let-cry approach to sleep training (as well as his patronising & dogmatic tone) but the info in it is great.

Teaandcakeplease Thu 11-Nov-10 10:22:37

Yeah my two definitely slept worse and woke more when overtired I found. Which is ironic as you'd think they'd be so tired they'd sleep right through but they definitely slept far far worse when overtired smile

whatsleep Fri 12-Nov-10 12:20:08

thanks teaandcakes, I have been trying to comfort her in her cot this week rather than picking her up. previously have been putting dummy in and feeding if all else fails, but this week i have stopped middle of the night feeds and have managed to settle her off without the bottle! want to crack it this weekend while DH is at home and not having to get up early for work and DD1 not having to get up for school. cant move baby into her room yet as she will be sharing with dd1, so she needs to be sleeping well! on the up side i have been laying on the bed where she can see me when i put her in her cot and have managed to read a few chapters of my new sophie kinsella book whilst waiting for her to drop off to sleep....1 hour last night but only 20 minutes for her late morning nap today.
Angledog, I didnt think of seperation anxiety, and the fact that she cat naps during the day could mean she over tired? am putting her in the cot now for daytime naps and she is sleeping for longer so hopefully with all the effort i am putting in something should work!! thanks ladies (or gentlemen/creatures of the deep...who knows!)

dycey Fri 12-Nov-10 13:07:01

Some babies just love co- sleeping, my sister had one. Mine didn't - he just loved sucking (milk and dummy). My sister did manage to get her son to sleep all night in his cot without feeds from about 9 months but she co-slept along the way. One way and another she got there and on and off the cosleeping has been a real help, when ill and getting up early etc.. Sorry not much help. I love the no cry book but if you don't mind crying you could do a straightforward sleep training - millpond book is good!

Teaandcakeplease Fri 12-Nov-10 14:37:37

At about 9 months something happens brain development wise and they start sleeping better at night. It's in the book I linked to. So I didn't push too hard on sleeping through until then iyswim? But I didn't feed them everytime they woke either before that as outlined in my previous post smile

Are you following Gina Ford or something I take it? As a lot of books insist they should be sleeping through by 6 months iirc.

Great about the naps in the cot in the day, a couple of good naps a day will make all the difference at this stage.

whatsleep Fri 12-Nov-10 20:45:20

no not following any books just winging it!

whatsleep Fri 12-Nov-10 20:51:29

its not that i think she should be sleeping through, but the waking every 30 minutes to an hour is just getting daft! roll on 9 months i think. I have nothing againt co sleeping but our bed is just not big enough and she fidgets and wriggles too much! off to sleep ok tonight, a few more chapters read in my book and fingers crossed for a better night!hmm

Teaandcakeplease Fri 12-Nov-10 21:20:11

Oh no waking every 30 mins is hideous and not normal. Eeek!

PassionKiss Fri 12-Nov-10 22:15:21

Whatsleep - I'm in a similar situation to you (see my thread on here!). My DD is 65 months too - except she wakes for boob not dummy but it comes to the same thing!

I also end up co-sleeping most nights as by 4am I've had enough of getting out of bed! I hate it though - I don't sleep well and I'm scared she will fall out.

I'm trying some sleep techniques (not very successfully so far!)

Let me know if you try anything that works! Every 30mins is exhausting I know!

PassionKiss Fri 12-Nov-10 22:15:59

6.5 months obvs!

Teaandcakeplease Sat 13-Nov-10 07:48:51

I think buying that book would be the best bet imo smile Having had some sleep and considered all the things I could suggest to try.

I do like the baby whisperer shush/ pat technique and her pick up put down, they do work and are nicer than any form of CC. But that book will be very helpful.

whatsleep Sat 13-Nov-10 16:37:35

i did use the baby whisperer book alot with my first dd, last night was better, i put her in the cot at 6.30 when she started to look tired (rubbing eyes and pulling ears) she got excited when i put her in and spent about an hour rolling around and playing...i lay on the bed next to the cot and read my book, so not paying her much attention. when she started to get to the point when she needed to go to sleep, she got a little but niggly, struggling to know how to settle herself i expect, i patted and rubbed her back, laying her on her side, she soon settled and went to sleep (8pm!!) woke twice during the night, she cried for about 10 minutes with me next to her trying to comfort her, picking her up made no difference, i gave her a small amount of water to calm her, but put her back in the cot awake, she went off after 20 mins in total...would have been quicker if i had fed her or rocked her to sleep which was very tempting at 3am! woke again at some point then at 5.30 when i fed her....put her in her cot for a late morning nap, she rolled over and went straight off....result....hope tonight goes as well!! thanks teaand cakes will get the book on monday if still struggling after the weekend, passionkiss, suppose you have to do what works best for you, i hate the idea of leaving baby on her own to cry, but feel that by sitting with her and providing some comfort is less cruel...obviously i would rather she didnt get upset but i think she is just frustrated that she cant settle herself yet? good luck x

whatsleep Sun 14-Nov-10 06:47:58

WHOOPEEEEEEgringringringringringrin[gr in]grin...she went to sleep at 6.30 last night, put her in the cot, she rolled onto her side, snugled in and went straight off. woke 4 times - stuck the dummy in and she went straight back off....so here I am, getting up at 6am and feeling pretty good!!! thanks for all the advise...xx

Teaandcakeplease Sun 14-Nov-10 08:07:52

That's brilliant. You didn't feed her at all overnight then? As I fed mine at 11pm ish and 3am ish until they were eating 3 meals a day and eating well, which was 9 months I think.

Teaandcakeplease Sun 14-Nov-10 08:11:06

That book is written by a sleep expert with 30 years experience and covers every age and stage of children. He goes through things like night terrors etc in there as well. I still refer to mine. He talks about their sleep cycles and all sorts of things. So you may enjoy reading the book anyway btw.

whatsleep Sun 14-Nov-10 08:33:22

hi teaandcakes, no didnt feed her at all, but even when i was feeding her she only ever took about half an ounce....should I actually still be feeding her through the night??? she has bottles during the day 6am, 10am, 2pm, 6pm approx and eats quite well??? Is this not right, I confused now confused!!!

Teaandcakeplease Sun 14-Nov-10 08:50:37

I think at 6.5 months most people usually still do at least a dream feed at 10 or 11 ish on the way to bed, I never woke mine at night for a feed after that but if they woke at 2 or 3 ish I did always offer something. If you can see she's not taking much if she's on bottles, then I can see why you decided not to feed her.

Most people do a feed on their way to bed to help their child sleep longer, but if they sleep through after that until 5.30/ 6 am then that's when their next feed is instead iyswim? She's still so little, so I'm reticent about not feeding her at all over night for eleven or twelve hours iyswim?

whatsleep Sun 14-Nov-10 09:12:49

well know im totally confused!!!!! she is growing well, having at least a pint a day which is what is recomended, and is not really interested in having any volume of milk during the night, eats pretty much anything i offer her (blw) readybrek, fruit, veg, toast, sandwiches, baby yoghurts etc....what would you suggest teaandcakes? x

Teaandcakeplease Sun 14-Nov-10 09:50:52

I didn't reduce any of the milk feeds for my children as I said until they were eating 3 meals a day and eating well and starting to drink water well out of a sucky cup too. I do not have my book here to refer to as I lent it to a friend. So start a topic in weaning and ask other mums when to start reducing milk feeds if you like? The mumsnet page on weaning says:

"What about milk?

Breast or formula milk is still a key part of your baby's diet while he's starting solids. This is not the time to start cutting out milk feeds. Only when your baby's on three good meals a day should you begin to think about reducing the amount of milk he has, And even then, it's wise to try to follow your baby’s appetite and go at your baby’s pace – let him decide how much milk he wants each day.

Your baby should still be having breastmilk on demand or 500-600ml of infant formula a day until the age of one. After his first birthday, you can replace formula (or breastmilk) with cow's milk but you can (and some would say should) continue to breastfeed for as long as you want."

Weblink: www.mumsnet.com/babies/weaning#Baby-led_weaning

I certainly weasn't meaning to confuse you. Formula fed babies can sleep better at night quicker but most people I know still did the 11pm feed until 9 months. As I said I would offer mine a feed in the middle of the night if they wanted it i.e. 2 or 3am until about 9 months as well. As I wanted to be sure they were drinking well from sucky cups and eating well first. But if they did not wake for a feed in the middle of the night I never woke them. But I always did the dream feed until 9 months. But I'm not trying to confuse you. Ask in weaning area if you like for more advice?

whatsleep Sun 14-Nov-10 10:01:00

thats great thankyou so much. xx

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