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What the sleb twaddle *really* means...

(15 Posts)
Megglevache Sun 05-Oct-08 19:10:15

...bit of Sunday night fun. Cliche bingo and all that. I'll start.

"They had the strongest marriage in showbiz"

He's gay she way fed up of being his beard.

Your turn grin

cocoleBOO Sun 05-Oct-08 19:12:35

"No we didn't have IVF for our twins"

They bought them of a poor, pregnant teenager. BOGOF.

Saturn74 Sun 05-Oct-08 19:14:40

"x has been admitted to hospital suffering from exhaustion".

x was so high that he was found careering round Harrods claiming to be a giraffe, and biting chunks out of the carpet.

Megglevache Sun 05-Oct-08 19:14:49


Caprice 43 if she is a day.

DevilishDisasterArea Sun 05-Oct-08 19:20:25

x deplores all cosmetic surgery procedures and is embracing her body and the aging process.......

x has had so many botox injections her face is fixed in a permenent grimace, so many face lifts her eyebrows have disappeared and so many tummy tucks she has had to have her beard epilated

Megglevache Sun 05-Oct-08 19:20:53


Cold turkey

SparkyFartDust Sun 05-Oct-08 19:23:07

"X is a devoted mother"

the nanny knocks off at 10pm to make way for the doula who does the night shift.

cocoleBOO Sun 05-Oct-08 19:23:49


cocaine od

cocoleBOO Sun 05-Oct-08 19:26:26

"I eat loads"

of lettuce

Megglevache Sun 05-Oct-08 19:49:04

CoCo do you write for Closer magazine?

Megglevache Mon 06-Oct-08 10:40:59

"I just have really good genes".

I have Dr Smythly-Ricketts(noted plastic surgeon) on speed dial

LurkerOfTheUniverse Tue 07-Oct-08 08:03:48

'i just breastfed and the weight dropped off'

i'm down the gym 5 days a what baby?

TheCrackFox Tue 07-Oct-08 10:32:54

"I found birth to be a truly magical and spiritually uplifting experience"

I had a c-section at 37 weeks to avoid getting stretchmarks and had a tummy tuck at the same time.

PortofinoPumpkin Tue 07-Oct-08 10:41:36

"Of course I still love him, and if you don't have trust you don't have anything"

"If he so much as looks at another woman again I will chop his bollocks off1"

SheikYerbouti Tue 07-Oct-08 10:44:13

"I am giving up work for a few years to truly embrace being a mother"

All of my offers of work have dried up.

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