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miscarriage in the health section?

(31 Posts)
justjules Sat 09-Aug-08 19:10:39


should it not be in becoming a parent? it kind of feels like it is 'left out' stuck in health on its own,

miscarriage is a part of becoming a parent, a very sad part granted, but many women do go on to have children and for them the m/c was part of thier journey to parenthood,

some of the problem and heartache involved with having a miscarriage is that other people do not accept or acknowledge that it was very 'real' to the person/s suffering, and that to them they were 'parents' albeit for a short time sad

i am not sure 'health is the best place for it,

please feel free to object...

catinthehat Sat 09-Aug-08 19:16:30

"miscarriage is a part of becoming a parent, a very sad part granted, but many women do go on to have children and for them the m/c was part of thier journey to parenthood,

some of the problem and heartache involved with having a miscarriage is that other people do not accept or acknowledge that it was very 'real' to the person/s suffering, and that to them they were 'parents' albeit for a short time"

Yes, that is my experience (too?). I agree with your point, didn't realise it was in Health.

redflipflops Sat 09-Aug-08 19:17:23

I agree with you jj

justjules Sat 09-Aug-08 19:30:29

i think it has been changed recently,

i can kind of understand why they put it in health,

i guess they didnt want to upset those posting in the m/c section by having it in becoming a parent,

however, i think given personal experience (x3) i would rather it be under the parent topic,

justjules Sat 09-Aug-08 23:57:40

no one at mnhq on a saturday tonight then shock wink

JustineMumsnet (MNHQ) Mon 11-Aug-08 12:18:44

Hi there,
It's a valid point certainly. Over the years a few people who've been very anxious about their pregnancies have said they'd rather not be confronted miscarriage info when they are already worried enough and clearly there are health issues to consider when you miscarry. That said we had a miscarriage chapter in our pregnancy book and will do in the next one. So we can see it both ways and we're happy to be swayed in this by what the majority think...

justjules Mon 11-Aug-08 14:37:44

i get the point about those who are anxious about their pregnancies not wanting to be confronted by miscarriage justine but what about the feelings of those who have actually suffered the miscarriage?

no one wants to be confroned by miscarriage agreed and you could also argue that those who have had miscarriage dont want to be confronted pregnancy either...

however, i still believe it would be better for all involved if they were in the same topic, after all if you are worried about your pregnancy you dont need to read the miscarrige section, all you are actually looking at is the heading miscarriage

KnightCider Mon 11-Aug-08 14:47:54

Another point to consider is some people prefer to look at it as a health issue. Especially in the early stages it's just too much to be thinking about it as anything else.
For me personally, it feels right in Health topic. Putting it in Parenting seems too insitent that you should feel a certain way.
I don't think anyone is going to be overly traumatised either way by which section it's in, though we all may have an preferance if pushed. Going through a miscarriage and the aftermath of one has enough of it's own traumas and worries, I don't mean to sound dismissive but I can't see why it matters what the title at the top of the page says when what you're after is the support and advice in the posts.

KnightCider Mon 11-Aug-08 14:54:48

It's also worth pointing out that Health is not just about the body. It encompasses mental health and wellbeing too.

justjules Mon 11-Aug-08 15:06:35

ok, so...

you post in ttc (in the becoming a parent topic)

then you post in pregnancy (again in the becoming a parent topic)

then sadly you miscarry and you are then posting in the 'heath' topic as it is no longer a 'becoming a parent' issue?

and for me it does not sit right next to general heath, mental heath, allergies etc,

no, noone is going to be overly traumatised by where it is and i agree at the end of the day you are looking for advice and support but i feel it would be more suited and easier to find (if you were using mn for the first time for example) in becoming a parent

LackaDAISYcal Mon 11-Aug-08 15:14:34

Perhaps a better place for it would be the Body and Soul Section, alongside bereavement? I know that for me my miscarriages encompassed both body and soul, with both my physical health and my mental well being suffering, and I grieved for my lost babies in a similar way to the way that I grieved for my parents (in fact I could argue that the miscarriages hit me harder because of all the lost promise, added to the physical, hormonal and emotional turmoil).

I don't want it to detract from anyone's experience of losing a loved one though sad

justjules Mon 11-Aug-08 15:18:56

good point daisy,

it was in body and soul to start with,

cornsilk Mon 11-Aug-08 15:21:30

I think it should be in health. Many people ( I'm talking mainly employers here) don't recognise miscarriage is a health issue and expect women to bounce back.

LackaDAISYcal Mon 11-Aug-08 15:29:58

I thought it had been jules. Don't even remember it moving to health.

Why was it moved from body and soul?

cornsilk, all the more reason for it be elsewhere I think; it's not really a health issue is it, for many women who go through a miscarriage, especially a late miscarriage sad, it's so much more than just health. It's the loss of a loved one and the assiocated grief and sense of loss that comes with it.

After my MCs there was nothing wrong with me physically (my body was doing what it needed to do after all) so my health was fine, but the emotional wounds were there and were very real.

justjules Mon 11-Aug-08 15:33:59

and daisy i just noticed this...

Miscarriage Standard Code of Practice - Mumsnet recommendations

Like everyone else we think the NHS should provide appropriate, responsive treatment that takes its cue from patients’ needs. Mumsnet members feel this is particularly important, but is often not the case, when it comes to miscarriage. Health care professionals must recognise miscarriage as the traumatic event that it is, akin to a bereavement.

justjules Mon 11-Aug-08 15:34:40

the same artical refers to 'the parents' all the way though

LackaDAISYcal Mon 11-Aug-08 15:52:34

good detective work jules smile

So a move from health would seem prudent, but where to? back to body and soul? or into parenting?

GeraldineMumsnet (MNHQ) Mon 11-Aug-08 16:54:13

Hi, the reason we moved it was because we wanted to move health from body & soul (it was too big and unwieldy and needed breaking down into more topics) and miscarriage seemed to fit better in the Health category. But if people feel strongly miscarriage should move back to body & soul, that's not a problem.

kate2179 Mon 11-Aug-08 17:38:25

I agree that health is not the best place for it, for me it would sit best in 'becoming a parent' given the way I feel about my own experiences, but I do think body and soul would be better than health, it has not felt like a health issue to me (either time sad)

LackaDAISYcal Mon 11-Aug-08 17:48:04

thanks geraldine smile

hey kate smile. How are you doing lovely?

teeheelaydee Mon 11-Aug-08 18:05:47

I agree that it shouldn't be in the health section and whilst I understand people who are pg don't want to think about m/c the feelings of those who have been though it are important too. One of the things that I found so hard when I m/c x 3 was that it was swept under the carpet and finding info was really hard.

For example there are shelves and shelves of baby name books in bookshops but you will struggle to find one on m/c and it contributes to that feeling of being alone.

It is not a simple health issue and often gets treated to clinically so I think becoming a parent is more appropriate and easier to find because you may have been there already in ante-natal or ttc.

mcchesers Mon 11-Aug-08 21:25:46

LackaDAISYcal and justjules have it right, the emotional rollercoaster after a mc (IMHO) is better recognized in "pregnancy" considering your body still considers you still pregnant for at least a month after the products of conception have been expelled.

The other thing is that my fellow mumsnetters helped me in trying to conceive after my miscarriage. It made the transition back to pregnancy easier than if I were on my own. Just knowing that the antenatal threads were juuust on the other side of the conception threads and that helped inspire me.

sorry if this makes no sense..I have a month old baby boy who is happily sucking the life out of me via my nipples. zzzzzzzzzz

GeraldineMumsnet (MNHQ) Tue 12-Aug-08 17:43:12

We're still keeping an eye on this. Does anybody else have anything they want to add?

ilovemydog Tue 12-Aug-08 17:45:06

bereavement - sub catagory, miscarriage?

justjules Tue 12-Aug-08 21:35:29

any one else have thoughts on this?

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