No kissing with tongue

(23 Posts)
superwoman232 Thu 15-Apr-21 23:50:01

The guy I'm seeing doesn't like to kiss with tongue. We just kiss on the mouth but no tongue. Is that weird? Has anyone come across this? Should I bring it up? We will be "making out" on the couch but he won't ever use tongue and now I just feel weird using it.

OP’s posts: |
Osirus Fri 16-Apr-21 01:02:24

I would find that unusual, but I know not everyone likes it. I couldn’t put up with that though, I love a good kissing session and I think it’s an important part of foreplay.

Depends how important it is to you, I guess. Can you live without passionate kissing?

Parkerwhereareyou Fri 16-Apr-21 05:39:09

Can you live without passionate kissing?

I couldn't and @superwoman232 it doesn't sound like you can either.

What happens if you try to initiate it? I guess that's your only choice, and or to tell him you love it and see if you can get him to try it. He may be uncertain but you might convince him it's a good way to go ...

If it's early days and he won't budge then it would put me off him I think.

Danceswithwhippets Fri 16-Apr-21 10:14:21

Bloke here.

Ahem. It may be you should have a chat with him and ask if there is anything about your kissing technique he doesn’t like? and objectively you may be an ace kisser, but not what he likes.

I love kissing and had a partner who adored it. But for me it was like snogging a drunk labrador puppy -spittle all over the shop. So I avoided it, and she thought I just didn’t like kissing.

But I was a wimp, and never told her, my bad.

Sacredspace Fri 16-Apr-21 10:54:18

So are we talking a peck on the lips? Because you can kiss passionately without using your tongue? You can use your (open) mouth, lips, teeth etc

Vegiepatch Fri 16-Apr-21 11:18:11

Agree, I prefer kissing with lip technique but mostly because so many partners have been crap tongue kissers. (I have an awesome tongue kissing partner now but he is a crap lip kisser! 😄). I like the sensation of lips mingling more than slobber, unless it’s done right, so that could be the issue, that it’s just his preference or he has had a previous bad experience maybe? Or a taste issue?

Parkerwhereareyou Fri 16-Apr-21 12:36:21

Slobber doesn't sound great. Maybe he's had a bad experience. Maybe you need to try just a tiny bit to see how he reacts.


superwoman232 Fri 16-Apr-21 14:41:09

@Danceswithwhippets it's actually that he never tried it with me so he can't even know if I'm good or not. He doesn't ever do it! It's such an awkward convo to have. Argh. We've been on 5 dates.

OP’s posts: |
Fruititty Fri 16-Apr-21 15:26:20

How much further than kissing have you got? Maybe he associates kissing with tongues with full on rumpy pumpy and is being respectful.

superwoman232 Fri 16-Apr-21 15:39:38

@Fruititty not far. Not even titty touching. Hands on ass, caressing , cuddling. And it's been 5 dates.

OP’s posts: |
Fruititty Fri 16-Apr-21 15:52:49

Maybe he's shy?

Wherearemymarbles Fri 16-Apr-21 18:18:49

My wife absolutely hates tongues other than hers in her mouth.

I’m not a massive fan - biggest turn off ever is kissing a woman who wants to explore my tonsils with her tongue!

We do use tongues but its very subtle

GeorgeOhWell Fri 16-Apr-21 19:36:29

I used to love kissing with tongues. Sadly, along with any other physical intimacy, it is denied me. I do miss it thoughhmm

NoBetterthanSheShouldBe Sat 17-Apr-21 08:56:09

I struggle with kissing with tongues ... my pre-marital relationships didn’t involve much kissing. Current partner adores it though and I’m getting more into it (and better at it, so he says).

I wouldn’t be happy engaging in it as a PDA or unless it was part of foreplay.

Mxflamingnoravera Sat 17-Apr-21 10:27:05

Will that extend to oral? I hope not.

JustAnotherOldMan Sat 17-Apr-21 15:20:06

Kissing with tongues is 🤮, never liked it, never will..
@superwoman232 next time you’re kissing (tongues or not) take one of his hands in yours and put it to your breasts, I’m sure he’ll get the hint

cushioncovers Sat 17-Apr-21 20:00:41

Can I delicately suggest to make sure your oral hygiene is top notch just in case and see if that changes anything 🤷🏻‍♀️

AverageGuy Mon 19-Apr-21 08:19:18

I can't imagine a relationship without a proper snog!

It's the first thing my XW stopped us doing as her libido started dropping off... sad

I personally see it as a way to show how turned on / passionate I feel about my partner, and very much part of foreplay.

@superwoman232 - 5 dates and he hasn't even attempted to feel your breasts? Maybe he sees you as a keeper, and doesn't want to rush / ruin things.

Or maybe he's just not that interested... sad

superwoman232 Mon 19-Apr-21 13:52:44

Ok everyone calm down - we did the deed and there was kissing with tongues 😂 this was yesterday. He has been texting me ever since as normal but not arranged to meet up again yet... or is it too soon?

OP’s posts: |
cushioncovers Mon 19-Apr-21 16:41:41


Gymsmile21 Fri 21-May-21 15:56:15

I knew a guy who kissed like that!! I didn’t like it at all!! I know I’m a good kisser, it wasn’t me, he just thought that’s how you kissed?? It was weird, opening and closing my mouth like that, felt like kissing a fish!!

Teal123 Sat 22-May-21 18:14:28

Mine only gives me a peck on the lips. Starting to feel like a prostitute.

Maria53 Sun 30-May-21 02:11:46

I like kissing with tongues too much, so I couldn't be doing with that.

I used to make out with a guy like you describe. It was fun for a while but his kissing technique didn't match with mine and what I liked - it lacks passion imo

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