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Dirty talk - advice/help needed

15 replies

Drawingaline44 · 20/07/2020 15:27

My DP has asked me a few times to do dirty talk during sex. Nothing weird or excessive, just to say a few things.

For some reason I find it really difficult and I don’t know why. I have managed it a few times but overthink it and can’t say anything.

Are there any tips for learning to relax a little more and just do it. I am frustrating myself with it, as I want to do it and think I would like it too, but my brain just doesn’t want to allow it!

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waterSpider · 20/07/2020 15:48

Probably you just need to describe what is happening, or about to happen, but in slightly exaggerated & more graphic tones.

'I need to be fucked senseless.
You make me so wet.
Let me take that huge cock in my mouth.
(earlier in evening) ... I'm going to give you a wild ride tonight.

[right, off for a cold shower now].

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Namechanged1010 · 20/07/2020 16:25

I think guys like it but it isn't something always easy to discuss. A bit like you have found. I found out my DH really liked it when he had had a drink, was relaxed and in the throws of arousal when he said something quite dirty to me and I actually responded and he just said "oh don't stop". I said something else but he came straight away he was that turned in. After we were cuddling and he said how hot he found it when I talked dirty. I felt embarrassed discussing it...supposed part of it as women we are supposed to be "good"!

I still find it embarrassing at times and have to be really in the mood, and also aroused before I do it. I don't do it all the time either. I find it easier to do if DH starts it and says something to me. For eg last time he said "you are a dirty little wife" and I responded "you make me like that as your cock is so big and hard and makes me horny". It just got dirtier as I got more confident and would sound awful if I repeated it all here in the cold light of day!

I think it is something you have to are your time with but tell him it helps if he takes a lead and if you feel comfortable you will respond and then perhaps you can egg each other on. My DH really likes it if when talking dirty I come across as slutty.

Good luck it can be a lot of fun exploring it

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Drawingaline44 · 20/07/2020 16:34

Thanks for the tips!
I agree I think maybe I need to get him to start it too. It really is nothing even sinister. Just simple stuff, but I just have this stoppage in my brain that won’t let it come out my mouth!

So frustrating as I know he likes it but as soon as I start overthinking it stops. I will ask him to say some stuff to me too and see if that helps. That’s a good idea, Thankyou!

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namechanged1010 · 20/07/2020 17:03

@Drawingaline44
Good luck..let us know if it worked ok,especially for you

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itsureis · 20/07/2020 22:03

I find it hilarious when I say something dirty and they say "what did you say?" Because they haven't quite heard me 😂

So make sure you're loud enough but not too loud if you have the windows open 😬

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itsureis · 20/07/2020 22:03

I find it hilarious when I say something dirty and they say "what did you say?" Because they haven't quite heard me 😂

So make sure you're loud enough but not too loud if you have the windows open 😬

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NCuserfromtheblacklagoon · 20/07/2020 23:02

@itsureis

I find it hilarious when I say something dirty and they say "what did you say?" Because they haven't quite heard me 😂

So make sure you're loud enough but not too loud if you have the windows open 😬

😂 probably best to move on than stop to repeat yourself. At least they don’t correct your pronunciation! 😂
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Spritesobright · 21/07/2020 23:34

I'm the opposite. I'd like my DP to talk dirty to me but he finds it uncomfortable/awkward.
I end up having a little dialogue in my head of what I wish he'd say.
Ultimately I don't mind that he's not into it as the sex is fab in other ways.

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Drawingaline44 · 22/07/2020 00:44

Well I Managed to do it, it gets easier after the first few times, I do find it awkward but mainly because I make myself laugh with it, thinking who do I think I am, off some kind of porn film or something!

But DP likes it and I also do like it, it’s just getting over those nerves of do I sound stupid

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Anotherblokelurking · 24/07/2020 06:22

If you find it ,er, hard, to talk dirty, you could try this .... www.mumsnet.com/Talk/mumsnet_classics/115727-pirate-noises-during-sex?pg=3

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itsureis · 24/07/2020 09:26

That's funny 😂 🏴‍☠️

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MrMeeseekscando · 24/07/2020 11:17

Drop your voice lower and just describe what's going on!
Apparently I'm very good at filthy chat but I've no idea how.

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Anotherblokelurking · 25/07/2020 07:16

Dirty talk doesn’t have to include four letter words if they don’t come naturally, you can say things like - god that’s so hard - I’m so wet - oh yes I like it hard/fast, I need it in me now, or as you do things to him such as stroke his penis - do you like that? Would you like to put it in me? Can I lick it? Etc

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notevenat20 · 25/07/2020 11:05

It's much easier than you might think. Men are (largely) simple beasts when it comes to sex. You can literally describe sex you have had with him, are currently having with him or are going to in biological detail and that will do. If you add that you love it and want more of it then he is very likely to be satisfied. No imagination or literary skills are required.

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mumofthree1993 · 12/08/2020 22:47

I'm the same I want to but my brain doesn't let me. Haha

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