New Partner having trouble

(8 Posts)
Cumberbitch0436 Sat 14-Apr-18 22:22:38

I've started dating a new guy, the oral sex is really good and he likes to be adventurous which really turns me on. However, we've tried to have sex a few times and each time he's cum really quickly.

I'm not sure if it's something to do with me, if he's just nervous or if it's something else.

Is there any advice on anything I could do to help him? Or any ways I could improve on the build up to sex?

OP’s posts: |
balsamicbarbara Sun 15-Apr-18 11:48:58

Get him to masturbate an hour before. Or if it's really bad, give him a handjob to completion as the first step in foreplay. Even if he doesn't then climax during penetration you'll get a good chance to!

MarieG10 Sun 15-Apr-18 16:33:11

Balsamic has given good advice, although I think he would prob prefer you masturbating him. I suspect it is because it is still all new and he is getting very turned on. At least you are not in the position some are on here where the DP can't come or doesn't want sex but you are right to try and get it sorted. Good luck with the relationship

bridgetoc Sun 15-Apr-18 19:13:23

My DH is great at oral....... Like a lot of men that suffer from premature ejaculation, he is also great with his hands and toys also. This is because they have to make up for their lack of staying power, and inability to satisfy through penetration.

Sounds like your new guy may be the same?

Good advice from Marie and Balsamic.......

Cumberbitch0436 Sun 15-Apr-18 19:36:39

Thank you so much, I will definitely give all of these a try.

It's the first time I've encountered this issue with a partner, so I was unsure of how common it was but it's reassuring to see that it's something that can be easily worked around.

OP’s posts: |
TiredMummy18 Sun 15-Apr-18 22:20:00

One of my ex’s had the same problem, came extremely quickly and I mean minutes, but was amazing with his hands.

bridgetoc Sun 15-Apr-18 23:18:38


Minutes is not to bad...... When I first got with my DH he would come in seconds!


doughnutbits Tue 17-Apr-18 16:36:59

OP hope you don't mind a male perspective, because your partner is just like me.

In cold scientific evolutionary terms, copulation in pre-historic times had to be quick because of the dangers from predators. Maybe some of us still have that gene. In human loving terms your friend wants to be adventurous, has met a lovely willing person and when the gates of paradise are so so close, it is so so difficult to hold on.

You've had some suggestions, if you're happy being on top you can press yourself against his pubic bone so that even if he stops you can still keep going. That was useful for us when ED happened.

There are creams and pills available, we never used them, but he needs to see GP before going down that route.

There's a couple of training exercises you could try but easier if you take charge. Stimulate him with the understanding he lets you know he's getting close, when that happens using your finger and thumb squeeze him hard just under the head. Or, when he's getting close, stop and rest a while and start again.

All the best to you both.

Join the discussion

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

Join Mumsnet

Already have a Mumsnet account? Log in