Is it ever possible to start having sex again once it's petered out

(5 Posts)
Mumtoahostofdingbats Tue 02-May-17 05:15:05

Been married 12 years, 3 kids. Sex never been great, i.e. He's never been that forthcoming. No sex through pregnancies and pretty sparse between them. He's now not really interested at all. Needs viagra if we do. Haven't for months now. I have a high sex drive and need intimacy. Will it ever get better in your experience or am I looking at the end of the relationship?

OP’s posts: |
Happybunny19 Tue 02-May-17 10:19:32

I would say it's certainly possible to get things going again if you started out with a good foundation, but you describe someone who presumably has always had a low sex drive, so you're actually asking if it's possible to fundamentally change that persons stance. In these circumstances I don't think it's possible. Are you able to discuss your differing needs and come to a compromise that you're both happy with? Is there love and affection in your everyday lives, hugs, kisses, niceties etc?

Mumtoahostofdingbats Wed 03-May-17 07:40:28

There is some affection but it's just so weird as he slaps my bum or will say you look sexy in that and then not act on it. EVER. On the other hand he has admitted he doesn't find me attractive anymore. Unless I dole myself up for a night out or dress up in sexy lingerie. Not the most regular occurrence with a young family and work 😵

OP’s posts: |
Lovemusic33 Wed 03-May-17 19:27:54

He has said he doesn't find you attractive anymore sad, surely if you love someone you find them atractive inside and out?? Maybe it's time to call it a day and find someone who can fulfill your needs?

I split with dh after 10 years, sex was almost non existent and I didn't find him atractive anymore, took me a while to admit that I was no longer in love with him.

Fortnum Sat 06-May-17 12:07:32

Its easy to get into a rut and not bother. Which is sad. We have gone as long as a year before ! We always reignite the flame though somehow. We are currently active again and we find the more we do it the more we want it. Id say its definately possible - sometimes you just need to have a really good session to completely fall in love again. Oh and Cialis ! No erectile disfunction without it per say but it makes things so much better with regard to recovery time and being able to have sex 4-5 times in a night if thats what you want to do.

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