Foreplay

(11 Posts)
IAmTheBadOne Sun 15-Jan-17 13:32:40

Been with DH 12years, foreplay in my eyes does not exist (unless you count a quick rub and boob rub/kiss). I am really missing a full blown foreplay - I know that he has stressful job/tired a lot, but I am fed up now. I am putting a lot into sex and receiving back v little - it is usually me leading and don't mind giving him oral etc. He has been a v selfish lover for a long time (and in a way I did not mind for a period of time as we had young children / busy) but now I really want to address it. How do I do it without sounding demanding?

OP’s posts: |
kormachameleon Sun 15-Jan-17 13:42:18

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

RoseOfSharyn Sun 15-Jan-17 15:31:26

When I met my DP he was very inexperienced and didn't realise what a major part of sex foreplay was.

I turned it into a bit of a game... 'I'm going to make you cum without shagging you. Then you're going to return the favour!' type stuff. Worked a treat.

Buttonmushroomex Sun 15-Jan-17 19:15:18

Would be respond to some texts? Is he generally selfish or have you just gotten into a rut?

IAmTheBadOne Sun 15-Jan-17 20:01:39

I like the game idea.. will try that.

I would say he is generally selfish. I do normally go on top and we go for positions I like the most, but still not orgasming. Few months ago I did say that our sex life does not do much for me (I never orgasm) and it improved slightly but it is still a long way to go..

OP’s posts: |
RoseOfSharyn Sun 15-Jan-17 20:31:31

If you're both up for it, I found a bit of bondage helped too. Tie him up, be a tease and tell him it's allllllll about him, then swap, have him tie you up, and make it clear 100% attention is to be given to you.

Hope you find something that works. flowers

RoseOfSharyn Sun 15-Jan-17 20:33:32

Oh and toys.....I can't cum without clitoral stimulation. If you're both up for that kind of thing love honey have TONNES of stuff and very reasonably priced!

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Buttonmushroomex Sun 15-Jan-17 21:01:20

Are you confident enough to get a toy and use it during sex?

A bullet, small wand or a Womanizer?

Thing is, it still makes him selfish. Try and be a bit dominant? When he kisses you can't you say in his ear, good now get down between my legs and kiss me there until I come?

He might be surprised enough to do it!

RoseOfSharyn Sun 15-Jan-17 21:14:54

button that is a great idea. That would drive my DP crazy!

OP have you tried talking dirty with him? If he knew what got you off would he be more inclined to do it? (I know you say he's selfish, but maybe his ego would play up to it?!)

How about a text? 'The way you lick me feels soooooo good?' Type thing?

IAmTheBadOne Sun 15-Jan-17 22:16:25

Great ideas ladies.
Love your advice Button! Can't wait to try this grin

OP’s posts: |
noego Fri 27-Jan-17 14:34:54

Go tantric

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