Any tips on having sex when there's kids at home

[als30]

Will be my first time having sex with my bf tonight but my ds is 12 and will be in the next room any tips on how we can do it without her knowing or hearing anything

[Gobbolinothewitchscat]

Don't make any noise?

[Soubriquet]

Yep try not to make too much noise

Make sure she's fully asleep. Maybe some music in the background (quietly) to help muffle it

[Sweets101]

Check he'said asleep and shut both doors.
Don't scream.
Really how hard is it? What sort of tips were you expecting?
If your that bothered and like to pencil sex into the diary maybe you should pencil DD into a sleepover on the same night next time.

[Somerville]

TBH I wouldn't have sex for the first time with someone new under those circumstances. You need to lock the door, and stay really quiet. But the first time with a new partner, talking is good. Or at least hums of approval. And there's no way of knowing that he can definitely keep quiet, if you don't know him really well.

[als30]

True i must of managed when she was a kid when i was still with her dad thanks by the way lol

[als30]

Just tips on how to still have a sex life with kids lol we have both discussed this over the past few weeks and feel we are ready just the thought of d hearing lol but as i said me and her dad when we were still together must have managed lol somehow

[Somerville]

Well 12 year olds know about sex than younger children so are more likely to cotton on to what's going on and feel embarrassed. Even if you do both manage to be very quiet, she will probably guess you're shagging just from the fact that you take him into your bedroom overnight?
Which... isn't necessarily wrong. But it does need a bit of thought and maybe talking to her first?

[ChristianGreysAnatomy]

I guess try not to lol too much, or s(cream)ol either. lol.

[AndNowItsSeven]

Lol . That is all.

[als30]

Thanks for the advice be real helpfull

[PinkiePiesCupcakes]

Wait till morning when she's at school.
Then go nuts.

[als30]

Prob will do as well haha

[Idontbelievethelies]

Di you have to have sex in the room next to her? What about downstairs?

[HerOtherHalf]

One of the hardest sources of noise to control is the bed itself. Make a little love nest on the floor with duvet and pillows - one problem solved.

[AkimboLimbo]

Would downstairs be a better place? With the TV or music on to muffle the noise.
Otherwise you just need to lock the door and keep very quiet!

[HandyWoman]

Love nest on the floor definitely.

Presumably there's no way you can do this in different circs (when she's on a sleepover etc)?

[Ineedmorelemonpledge]

Clear the Lego off the floor. It's murder on your arsecheeks.

[user1471558652]

It's probably too late now but I wouldn't tbh. I was around 12 when my sister and I both heard our df having sex with his gf in the room next door. He thought we were asleep, but we weren't. We still feel traumatised, embarrassed and upset by it to this day.

What Somerville said. I know you need a healthy sex life but please wait until your dc is out, just out of respect. However careful you are, there's a chance she will know what's going on. She's at a delicate age where she really doesn't need that.

[AkimboLimbo]

We still feel traumatised, embarrassed and upset by it to this day.
Whilst I understand that no-one wants to hear their parents having sex - traumatised & upset to this day? Is that not a bit dramatic?
Awkward, a bit embarrassing at the time, but surely you get over it!
I know friends who have walked in on their parents and managed to laugh it off afterwards.

[user1471558652]

Akimbo. Nope. Still upset about it. I think it was different because it wasn't my mum, it was a gf who I didn't like much and didn't feel had much respect for me. So hearing them going at it just made an already bad situation worse, I guess. I think if it was my dm I wouldn't have minded half as much.

Anyway sorry if I have offended anyone, that was just my experience.

[EvaWild]

The problem is children her age already know a lot and even if she doesn't hear you ... well there will soon enough be a picture about you two in her head.

[Lelloteddy]

Plenty of ways to have sex when the kids are in the house but I wouldn't entertain the idea of first time sex with a new bloke when she's next door.

What if he roars like a buffalo when he climaxes?

yes Ex H I'm looking at you

[Ineedmorelemonpledge]

The problem is children her age already know a lot and even if she doesn't hear you ... well there will soon enough be a picture about you two in her head.


Interesting post...wouldn't she have that same picture if it were both her parents both together since conception?

So why would it make a difference with someone else?