What does your orgasm feel like?

[movingforward2016]

So I was single for years, I was having sex during that time but the guy I was sleeping with was selfish and didn't really bother if I was pleased or not! Also I had one night stands that were the same.

Anyway now I have a boyfriend that I'm having great sex with! Yay he does care if it's good for me and wants to please me!

The thing is I can't tell if I orgasm or not! When he is giving me oral it feels very very good! But I never seem to have a massive orgasm and then feel like yep I'm done! I love sex and enjoy it lots! At times it's a very strong sensation which feels good but I just can't tell if it's an orgasm or not half the time!

Also when I use my vibrator again it feels good and intense at times but I still can't tell

That's why I am asking how it feels for others? I'm guessing it's not as earth shattering as people make out?

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If you've found this page in your search of the best sex toys that can help you achieve orgasm and have been recommended by fellow Mumsnet users, you might find our guide to the best sex toys for women useful. Hope this helps! MNHQ

[Lollyp333]

Do you ever think you've had one? I'm in the same boat. When I do it myself I tend to panic when it feels good then stop. It's annoying and I've never even come close to it with a partner.

[ncforthisonethread]

Wave after wave after wave from groin up through body then catch the wave to maintain then a complete wash over the body of almost numbness like a flood which then recedes after a peak ; that's how I know a full on but sometimes it's just the waves.

[wobblywonderwoman]

I think you would know op.

Just totally blissed out bit shaky.

[Missyaggravation]

I dont think I ever really get there either, it's like a literal anti-climax. I have rarely but that was quite random

[PaperdollCartoon]

My orgasms have never been very strong, but I definitely know when I have them. Waves/pulsing in the groin/vagina area. I feel a build up and then it kind of tips over... I understand the stronger you pelvic floor muscles are and the more build up you have the stronger they feel.

[Missyaggravation]

Sleep ones are the best, omg, they were the ones that I'm like yep

[LondonStill83]

My sense is that you would know if you were having them, so you probably aren't...

I find a very clear build up, plateaux, climax and then come down. It sounds perhaps like you get stuck at plateau?

[dun1urkin]

I was sexually active (first with myself, and then others) for about 10 years before I had an orgasm. I really enjoyed sex, lots of intense feelings and arousal etc, but when I actually came for the first time I knew
I don't know if everyone knows though, just that I really, definitely did!

[movingforward2016]

A few times with my new partner I have had a numbness and the first time was so strong my hands had pins and needles for ages after and my far was completely numb

I have had a lot of numbness and pins and needles during sex after that but not as strong!

I feel like I maybe am in the process of having an orgasm but it doesn't feel like it's completed maybe!

Also as mentioned above when I use my vibrator alone the feeling is really good but for some reason I move even so slightly and I just don't seem to get there

[Ineedmorelemonpledge]

Take a look at the Womanizer thread op. Maybe it can help?

[Brightredpencil]

Intense but fairly momentary surge is how I feel mine! My vagina often contracts a bit too and sometimes I squirt.
Sometimes straight afterwards I am extremely sensitive and can't go anywhere near my clit as it's so sensitive!!

[movingforward2016]

Bright - I hope this question isn't too intrusive and if you don't want to answer I understand but do you have any idea what makes you squirt?

I have done it twice before at random times with two different partners! With my new boyfriend I often feel like I'm at the stage where I'm going to squirt but it doesn't happen!

I think what happens when I am having an orgasm is I get there but it's a very strong feeling so I kind of back away and don't have the full finish

[Brightredpencil]

I don't mind- oversharing is what the internet was made for!! Keys for me: total relaxation, general good foreplay/feeling good, stimulation of my g spot which is on the front 'wall'? Of my vagina about an inch and a half in!!!

[RumnCokeplease]

It sounds to me like you need to build it up and slow it down a few times, before you let yourself go over the edge and actually orgasm.

When you're getting that, I'm about to moment, slow it right down and keep it slow for quite a long time. Have you got a vibrator?

Hope I'm not being too forward, but we're all grown ups ey

[Branleuse]

i think you havent had orgasms yet, because youd certainly know. It does sound like youre on your way there though

[rackhampearl]

You should definitely get that feeling 'I'm done' afterwards. Even if you can go again. An orgasm happens and there's a feeling or relaxation and contentment afterwards. (After the trembling and breathing settles down lol) sex without orgasm would leave me really frustrated so I bet you are having them. Orgasm is like that feeling you get when you sneeze but in your genitals and far stronger. Wow, orgasms are hard to explain. Lol.

[RumnCokeplease]

Not every orgasm feels the same though. Sometimes I can think to myself, oh my god this is going to be fucking amazing and it's....good and other times they catch me by surprise and are mind blowing!!

OP, it sounds like you're afraid of letting go completely. You should get some alone time and think about something that really turns you on. Sounds simple, but the mind is very powerful and being alone takes the pressure off a bit.

[rackhampearl]

After an orgasm like PP my clitoris is usually so sensitive it's like touching a snails eye and I have to kick DH the hell away from me till it settles.

[snozzlemaid]

God, yes. As soon as I'm done I shove dp away from my clitoris. Can't bear to be touched there. It's way too sensitive.

[MsStricty]

The pins and needles and numbness sound like tetany to me, OP - I would suggest slowing things down a little more, and noticing if you're either hyperventilating, or holding your breath.

[MephistoMarley]

I've had orgasms that are massively disappointing, they feel like little ripples and then stop. They are orgasms but really faint. Maybe that's what you are having?
I can have the strongest orgasms on my own, do you masturbate? The best way I have discovered fairly recently is to use fingers (not vibrators). Make sure you have a wee first and as you touch your clitoris pull your pelvic floor in, and push it out, as if you were pushing something out of your vagina. Do it slowly and gradually, and don't rub hard! Keep doing this until you orgasm, and I'm very sure you will know when it happens!
If you're rubbing the clitoris too hard you might get an intense feeling but probably won't orgasm as the nerves are too sensitive. Or you may get the weak 'fanny sneeze' orgasm I described earlier. That's what I get if I use a vibrator so I don't bother.

[movingforward2016]

Rum - I have lots of vibrators and I just bought a womanizer as recommended on another thread! It is very good but I think I do just need to practice alone for a while!

[movingforward2016]

I think from reading what others have said I am probably not relaxing and giving myself enough time to enjoy it and haw an orgasm! I'm always rushing around and probably rush with this too

[Ifihadmytimeagain]

MsStrictly
The pins and needles and numbness sound like tetany to me, OP - I would suggest slowing things down a little more, and noticing if you're either hyperventilating, or holding your breath.

Can you explain this a little more please? I do the hyperventilating and holding my breath thing and find it really difficult to orgasm. Is this why? What should I be doing?

[TheFlyingFauxPas]

I found the easiest way to have one when I started was with a shower 😁 head