getting excited but worried

(10 Posts)
moolady1977 Thu 13-Aug-15 22:31:41

my partner is coming home in 43 days we last slept together at the end of january and as excited as i am that he is coming home ,we will be living with his niece and im rather vocal but im more worried that he wont want to be with me or find me attractive anymore ,im really just posting here for some advice

OP’s posts: |
MrsBertMacklin Thu 13-Aug-15 22:33:11

cheap hotel the second night he's back to have a proper catch up?

WallyBantersJunkBox Thu 13-Aug-15 23:05:45

Do you flirt in your communication op? Send cheeky pics, fantasies etc?

moolady1977 Fri 14-Aug-15 01:15:52

the cheeky pics are a no he wouldnt get them but we write and chat on the phone but if i mention anything to do with fantasies he changes the subject

OP’s posts: |
WallyBantersJunkBox Fri 14-Aug-15 08:28:40

Is that why you are worried? Because you can't talk about sex together? Is this usual when he's away?

moolady1977 Fri 14-Aug-15 18:03:21

no its not usual when he was first away our chats on the phone and our letters were all about our fantasies and how we couldnt wait to be back together and in each others arms again but now its all day to day stuff and skirting round any intimate subjects ,,, i dont think he is cheating but this is the longest we have been apart and im worried he wont want me or find me attractive anymore

OP’s posts: |
pocketsaviour Sat 15-Aug-15 14:59:15

How long have you been together? Is he away with work?

we will be living with his niece

How has this come about? Are you living there now?


moolady1977 Sat 15-Aug-15 21:00:19

we have been together over 2 years ,, no he is in prison i wish he were working away though ,, i share a house with his niece and her partner its a money saving thing we could neither afford to rent on our own so rent a house together

OP’s posts: |
pocketsaviour Sun 16-Aug-15 12:08:45

Ah I see. Do you think maybe he's stopped talking about intimate things because it's just too difficult to talk about when he knows he won't be seeing you for a while yet?

I have never been inside or have anyone close who has been, but I have heard it said that the last part of the sentence goes more slowly than the whole of the rest.

Do your housemates work days? If so I would try to take advantage of them being out to have a nice noisy session ;)

WallyBantersJunkBox Sun 16-Aug-15 20:08:46

I don't know what the situation is in a modern prison but I'm sure he is wary of getting to excited or aroused with very little privacy to speak on the phone or write letters that may not be completely private.

Also I imagine after a long time without sex you can go off the boil, especially surrounded my nothing but members of the same sex?

He might have the same fears as you, have you gone off him for whatever reasons?

I would just take it slow. I was an army wife, sorry to make assumptions but I thought perhaps he was a squaddie! You build up and up and then nerves and anxiety and the overwhelming need to be just relaxing at home with a cup of tea take over...

We re ended to just enjoy intimacy and closeness, cuddling, skin to skin, massages, floor picnics, chatting and relaxing. Otherwise it's quite a lot of pressure to perform.

Hope it goes ok for you op.

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