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Secondary education

Uniform question - to be mean mummy or not?

17 replies

seeker · 20/07/2008 07:58

My dd started secondary school last year with a whole new uniform costing £250. Including a compulsory uniform jacket. She lost the jacket halfway through the year so we had to buy another one - and then she found the lost one. Grr. Another £35! But, I thought it'll last for ages, and she's got uniform inherited from an older friend, so I won't have to buy any more until she leaves!

And then they announced that the uniform will change from September - but that people can wear the old one til the grow out of it. The new uniform is much nicer than the old - and the games kit is actually something that they would want to wear - as opposed to the old one, which made even the slimmest look like burgundy saggy baggy elephants!

Dd hasn't grown for ages - and she may not - she's already the height that a lot of women in my family reach. She hasn't mentioned a new uniform (bless her) but I know she's like it and we can afford to. But I hate getting new stuff for the sake of it,and I know there will be plenty of girls who can't afford it and I hate the idea of them comparing and the ones with all new queening of the ones that haven't. Which I'm sure even the nicest girls will a bit.

What would you do? Buy new or make her wear the old uniform until the 6th form (I have enough hand-me downs!) Anyone read Antonia Forest school stories?

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bellabelly · 20/07/2008 08:08

Wait until September and see how many of her mates are wearing the new one.

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tigermoth · 20/07/2008 08:15

Agree with seeker about the main uniform.

But if the games kit is really much nicer and you can afford it, buy that as a compromise?

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tigermoth · 20/07/2008 08:17

sorry, I meant agree witih bellabelly!

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tigermoth · 20/07/2008 08:20

Also who says the new uniform is nicer? You, your dd or her friends? You may all have different opinions . So definitely best to wait till term starts IMO.

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seeker · 20/07/2008 08:35

tigermoth - anyone would say the new uniform is nicer - it's one of those rare things that the girls, the teachers and the parents all agree on!

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EffiePerine · 20/07/2008 08:37

Whatabout keeping her in her current uniform till she growsout of it, then new rather than hand me downs?

You may have to reconsider if everyone else is in the new stuff

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tigermoth · 20/07/2008 08:44

It sounds like a very rare uniform to me

Can you mix and match with old and new or do you have to change it all at the same time?

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seeker · 20/07/2008 08:50

I know - but you don't realize how grim they thought the old one was. They hated it because it looked exactly like a Primary school uniform. And they LOATHED the uniform jackets. They were just fleece jackets with a waterproof outer -perfectly sensible and practical in my opinion - but they absolutely reviled them!

No - you have to wear all new or all old.

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tigermoth · 20/07/2008 09:25

well, if really is that loathsome - AND that is the majority view, AND you can afford to change it, then do so

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DontNeedAnything · 20/07/2008 09:31

I agree with Eppi.

Let her grow out of her current uniform and then buy her new rather than using the hand me downs.

TBH although they have said you can grow out of current uniform I suspect that expect that will be within 12-24m - so when a significant proportion of hte school are in new they will put a final deadline on it.

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PuppyMonkey · 20/07/2008 09:35

Weird to have two uniforms on the go though. And bound to lead to "oooh, she's still in the old one, the poor cow" scenarios. Don't like it.

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Tigerschick · 20/07/2008 09:45

My secondary school changed the uniform the year before I left. There was no 'phasing in' we just had to get the new one - luckily it was infinately nicer (old one was dress of pale blue, pink and brown stripes - I kid you not - and new one was black skirt or culottes (sp?) and a white school polo shirt.)

I agree with the 'wait and see' philosophy. You never know, she may still have a growth spurt before next term!
But I would buy new gym kit, the old one sounds vile!

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frogs · 20/07/2008 09:54

If you can afford to buy new, I would probably have a brief discussion with her about it now and then leave your decision open until closer to the start of term. You can then give her some decision-making power regarding priorities if there are other expensive things she would like bought over the summer, and also gently make it clear that your decision may be influenced by her behaviour and general demeanor over the holidays.

FWIW that's the tack I tend to take with my older two -- I'm on the whole pretty generous as far as means allow, so would probably incline towards buying the new kit. But I definitely wouldn't want her to take it for granted that I'd shell out for new gear if the old was still adequate, and would want to see signs of Effort Being Made over the summer. It's quite wholesome for them to realise that they do actually have some control over entering Moody Teenage Bitch mode, and that you may be more inclined to generosity if you can see some evidence of self-control and attempts at Niceness, Helpfulness and Consideration.

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musicposy · 20/07/2008 09:57

I'd wait until September but I reckon you'll end up more or less having to get the new anyway.
My daughter's primary changed their uniform in her final year. I actually liked the old one better - thought the design of the new one was very "kiddy". I was no way going to buy new, I said, and she wore the old for the first term. But after about a term, more and more parents had bought the new, and even those in Y6 ended up getting one sweatshirt eventually, despite it being a terrible waste. It's just that your child looked so out of place and like they were wearing old clothes if you didn't.
I notice this year (she's Y7 now) that there's virtually no one in the whole schoool wearing anything of the old uniform.
It seems such a waste as loads of those kids are younger siblings and would have had perfectly good clothes already. But I can't see any other way round it - if the uniform never changed it would look very dated 20 years down the line.

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magentadreamer · 20/07/2008 10:30

If she can wear the old uniform but swap to the new games kit I'd do that! I just hope DD's school doesn't do this as I've spent a fortune already - blinking polo shirts with logo's on Grr! I bought everything two sizes to big - aprt from trousers obviously! And don't get me started on the PE socks - £6 for a pair of socks - yup they've got the school logo on them as well!

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ravenAK · 21/07/2008 21:44

ooooh, Antonia Forest! Cool.

I wouldn't buy new stuff unless & until she specifically asks for it.

If she does, maybe a choice between new uniform or some new non-school clothes? It just seems like a waste of money to me.

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windygalestoday · 21/07/2008 21:49

buy her the new one you can afford it and there will come a time when it takes a lot more mony to make her hppy....school is about fitting in and being happy buy her the new uniform the older ones lasted a year and it will make her happy

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