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Boy-heavy school for a girl?

(16 Posts)
MadameGazelleIsMyHomegirl Sun 02-Feb-20 10:31:10

DD has been offered a place at a school which is 2/3 boys and 1/3 girls. It is a v good school, but DD is quiet and not pushy. What’s your experience of sending girls to boy-heavy schools?
There will be about 55-65 kids per year. I’m wondering if that means the potential friendship pool will be too small?

OP’s posts: |
SarahTancredi Sun 02-Feb-20 10:36:51

Cant speak for a boy heavy school but dd is in what's ended up being a boy heavy class.

From the sounds of it it's a night mate. To start with they did the boy girl boy girl seating plans which was a disaster for the girls .

And there is alot of disruption mainly from these boys.

I blame the boys for their behaviour but I also blame the teachers for their gendered stereotypical expectations for said boys.

I would avoid personally.

AppleKatie Sun 02-Feb-20 10:38:25

I would avoid. I don’t think it’s a healthy message to send a teenage girl that she’s a ‘minority’ when in fact in the world she isnt.

noblegiraffe Sun 02-Feb-20 10:49:33

Boys tend to dominate classrooms (research shows this) and also, from my experience, physical spaces - our outdoor spaces are taken up with boys playing sports while girls are pushed to the edges.

I’d be wary of sending my DD to a boy-heavy school anyway, but especially if she is quiet.

GrumpyHoonMain Sun 02-Feb-20 10:51:05

Girls tend to do a lot better in girls schools. Boys in co-ed.

Bluedogyellowcat Sun 02-Feb-20 10:55:08

We moved my daughter from a school like this. Let me say I am a huge fan of co-Ed schools and vehemently against girls schools but I think that with such small number of girls you’re at the mercy of the cohort. If it’s a difficult girl year and there is a limited pool of friends then it can be really hard to find a niche and to get away from unpleasantness.

I think the big number of boys is less of a problem. Co-Ed lends itself to uncomplicated boy / girl friendships but there do need to be a broad mix of girls in the picture too.

ClappyFlappy Sun 02-Feb-20 10:59:00

My son is still in primary but in a small class (18) with 12 boys and 6 girls. There were 2 more girls but they’ve moved away. The biggest problem as far as I know can be the friendships amongst the girls esp where one of them has been a bully.

MadameGazelleIsMyHomegirl Sun 02-Feb-20 11:02:11

Thanks all. The issues you have all raised are my concerns. I have seen already at DD’s primary that the boys dominate the space in the playground and also jump forward to grab resources / answer questions / get teachers attention in classroom activities - and that’s in a school with a 50/50 split. I have heard lots of good things about the new school, but negatives include that the boys are ‘arrogant’ and disruptive (despite v smallclass sizes) and the girls can be ‘timid’. I’m really worried. We’ve been offered a funded place which is wonderful, but I wonder if this is because they want to get the girl numbers up?

OP’s posts: |
SarahTancredi Sun 02-Feb-20 12:25:27

I think this is a common problem in areas where there are separate boys and girls schools. Girls do better in girls schools so given a choice many parents will pick the girls school.

Dont let your dd be a "guinea pig" if it is an attempt to get girls numbers up. Think about when she has to choose options or a levels. Its gonna be hard being one of only 2 or three girls in the class.

And if they have few girls in the school I doubt the pe will be that great either. Theres not gonna be many people to put a team together . They might not view it worth funding the.opportunities

rocketleagueboy Sun 02-Feb-20 13:47:38

It really depends on what other school options you have. It may not be ideal but with a full bursary is there any risk of just trying it?

Alsoplayspiccolo Sun 02-Feb-20 14:52:11

DS is at a school that is similar to the one you describe; there is a GDST school in the area but no boys' school.
His school works very hard to make sure the girls don't feel in a minority (for eg, the next school production is very female centric, there's girls football teams, lots of dance opportunities etc).
From what I can tell, there is a wide mix of personalities among the boys and girls, so no typical type of boy. DD is at a girls school, but is planning to move to DS' school for 6th form; she's not particularly outgoing or superconfident, but likes what she's seen of the school and the general feel.

Malbecfan Mon 03-Feb-20 08:32:49

Both my DDs were in classes/year groups where the split was around 60% boys to 40% girls. Both were quiet in year 7 but once they had established their friendship groups, they had a ball. Both have taken science A levels and are now studying for STEM degrees. Some boys can be boisterous, but there are also quieter boys who enjoy the civilising influence of the girls.

I was forced to go to an all girls school and detested the bitching and nastiness. No way would that be inflicted on my DDs. As it happens, the only all girls school here is independent and we simply cannot afford school fees so it was out of the question. Both DDs have lovely friendships with males and females and they love to meet up with all their friends during their vacations.

W00t Mon 03-Feb-20 08:48:55

I think it depends very much on your daughter and her character. My DD is in a boy-heavy school, in her year it's 25% girls, most years are similar. She is thriving, particularly in maths and sciences, and loves it. However, she was also in a boy-heavy primary (again, 25% girls in her year, 60 pupils a cohort) and is used to those ratios. She's not a girly girl, and not afraid of speaking her own mind particularly when contributing to lessons, but she's not pushy either. She has a brother whom she adores, and doesn't see boys as "other" which some girls definitely do. At her primary, some mums (and then their daughters) made vile comments about "boys", when I pointed out her brother standing next to us, they would say "oh, I don't mean him, he's lovely" hmm In some cases, those "boys" included their own sons!

Is your DD timid? Quiet people can be assertive and confident, how self-assured is she? If you think she'll benefit from the smaller class sizes, and the ethos suits her then go for it.

senua Mon 03-Feb-20 09:02:41

There will be about 55-65 kids per year.
That's a small school. Quite apart from the question of the boy/girl split, is it financially viable?

Alsoplayspiccolo Mon 03-Feb-20 12:08:11

senua, both my DCs ' schools have about 65 in the year. It's not an issue.

Alsoplayspiccolo Mon 03-Feb-20 12:10:02

Just to add to my earlier post: DD's primary school class was 3/4 girls and that was far more of a problem among the girls.

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