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Advice re choosing between CLC, Benenden and Downe House

(13 Posts)
WildFlowerGarden Sat 25-Jan-20 10:35:05

Hi there,

I was wondering if anyone could offer any advice and \ or current insights into any of these schools.

DD (Y6) is bright but has some mild social communication issues which are being worked on with her prep school counsellor. She is basically a bit socially immature - she prefers to play with girls in the year below because her interests are still "young" i.e. she's not interested in the same things as her peers (fashion\make-up\going to Little Mix concerts or talking about boys) - yet! And this has meant that she has been rather excluded from her peer group and has lost some of her good friends. She finds it upsetting that they no longer play together or that they no longer want to do the same things and this has led to arguments as she doesn't really understand. Head has recommended we look at, DH, Benenden and CLC and we should consider them in that order.

We have visited all three, and we loved them all, but in the reverse order: We felt CLC offered an amazing academic environment within a very pastoral setting, and Benenden came a very close second - really happy girls, but CLC had the edge because of the house system and being in town. But DH worried me as I felt it might be cliquey and you'd be a bit miserable if you didn't fit in (which given her traits would be a disaster) - although on the other hand I have also heard DH is wonderful for the "late developer".

Also, she'd be entering in Y9 - so there has to be good integration - I'm worried that at DH everyone would be strongly bonded because of the term in France - would it be difficult to break into those well established friendship groups?

I think they are all academically great so I am looking for any current information about these schools from a pastoral and SEN support perspective. Which would be the best option for a child who needs a stimulating academic environment but who might also be a bit delayed in her social development? We need kind girls and a happy, friendly environment.

Really grateful for your thoughts, especially if you have DDs already at these schools or if you have experience of bright girls with delayed adolescence.


OP’s posts: |
Luzina Sat 25-Jan-20 10:37:32

I don't know anything about these schools, but will she be boarding?

WildFlowerGarden Sat 25-Jan-20 10:43:07

Yes, she already boards at her prep school. She will be a full boarder, as she is now.

OP’s posts: |
Michaelahpurple Sat 25-Jan-20 17:15:39

I have two friends with daughters at CLC and have been impressed by how two such different girls (one sporty, one much more quirky) have both found their tribe. Sorry be do them joined at year 9 and huge and successful efforts to integrate the new joiners

WildFlowerGarden Sat 25-Jan-20 23:24:56

Thanks, @Michaelapurple, that's great to hear, especially regarding the efforts to integrate the girls in Y9. I really loved CLC. Do you mind sharing what you mean by quirky?

OP’s posts: |
Michaelahpurple Sun 26-Jan-20 22:11:23

In this case not at all sporty, not girly or into pop, make up and boys. But also not madly nerdy or spectrum-y either, which my choice of adjectives could have suggested.

MollyButton Sun 26-Jan-20 22:50:28

Sorry but just to ask, if she isn't happy at her Prep is there a good reason to keep her there until year 9?

Vargh Mon 27-Jan-20 10:11:13

If any one have experience to help me to take right decision,which one suits best ,am Asian for my son secondary school ,Loughborough Grammer school or Nottingham high school or Birksale sheffield. We plan to move based on which one right fit.

WildFlowerGarden Mon 27-Jan-20 11:10:58

@Michaelahpurple - thanks for the explanation!

@mollybutton - sorry, reading back it does sound like I have painted a very pessimistic picture - it's not that she isn't happy there - she loves it and has many friends - the girls in her year aren't horrible to her - she just isn't as mature as they are so she doesn't enjoy the games they play - but if they are doing other things, she is happy to join in with them. Dorm life is particularly fun I gather. The problem is more that she finds it difficult to deal with changes - e.g. when they no longer want to play the things they used to - she hasn't grown out of those games and they have. I'm not sure this makes any more sense!

OP’s posts: |
WildFlowerGarden Mon 27-Jan-20 11:14:54

@Vargh - you'll need to start a new thread to get the information you are looking for - this thread is about some particular girls schools that I am interested in - if you you look just below this message you will see a link called "start a new thread in this topic" if you click on that it will take you to a new page and you can ask your questions on there and I am sure someone will come along to help. smile

OP’s posts: |
Vargh Mon 27-Jan-20 11:20:24

Ok thanks new to this

WildFlowerGarden Mon 27-Jan-20 11:36:26

@mollybutton - so to answer your question more clearly (I hope) the fact that she is a bit delayed in terms of maturity means that we feel she would benefit from having an extra couple of years at prep before she goes on to senior school.

OP’s posts: |
whattodo2019 Sat 29-Feb-20 12:50:45

My daughter is currently at CLC I would be very happy to talk to you about our positive experiences. My DD is LC3

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