Hello,
My son has just started in Y7 of a new senior school and I am worried about the lack of diversity in the school which is making him struggle to find students he can relate to.
This message is not intended to start a racial debate. I just want to firstly explain how the boys in my son's school relate to each other, in order to help my son.
My boy comes from a mixed race family and has always had black, white and asian friends at primary school. However, what he is now experiencing is very different, as there seems to be a general segregation created by the kids themselves.
Since day one, the following general groups have formed:
- Black boys hang out together, in groups depending mainly on their background...so kids of Nigerian descent stick together, same with Ghanaian and then a few Caribbean.
- Polish kids make another close knit group and then,
- the minority white English kids (very small minority).
My son hangs out with the boys that went to his primary school, which happen to be black. He likes them but when they are in a group, he is finding it hard to relate to them. He doesn't like the music they listen to, they don't play the video games my son plays nor the sport he likes and they basically have nothing in common.
Other groups have already been formed and he is worried that he will not be able to find people with the same tastes and hobbies as him.
I have told him to try and open himself to new conversations with other kids, to join some of the clubs after school, but he is a bit shy and finds it hard. He is scared that if he is seen speaking to say "the polish groups", his current group may stop talking to him. I cannot blame him for worrying, as social relations in schools are very different now from what it was like when I was his age. I am also very sad and upset that a kids wish to segregate each other in this manner.
What else do I do? I just want him to find a few people he can relate to (whichever their background or race) before he gets more withdrawn.
Any ideas or comments would be appreciated.
Many thanks