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Not sure what to do about this situation at school

(45 Posts)
FoxyDog1234 Wed 12-Dec-18 17:33:40

My child is a rather kind child (13 yrs) but is a chatterbox and her head of year hinted towards the fact she might have ADHD . She’s told this certain teacher many times sh can’t help talking but her form teache just continues to single her and and put her down.what do I do ? Should I go for an adhd diagnosis although I’m not sure whether it will come inconclusive or not ? She is very easily distracted by people or things outside the window etc or things on walls and is lazy , forgetful and I’ve had her take multiple tests on this and they’ve all said they thinks she’s got ADHD . Does ADHD show up later I’m girls ? Or worsen as they get older as she was never a problem in primary only since age 12 but she’s always been hyper and lazy

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Wheresthebeach Wed 12-Dec-18 17:53:17

Yes go for a diagnosis. You need to understand if she's ADHD as she can get help if she is.

FoxyDog1234 Wed 12-Dec-18 18:09:21

I honestly don’t think there is anything school can do as she is clever and in set 1 but it’s her behaviour such as shouting out , talking , not following instructions , forgetting her books

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GreenTulips Wed 12-Dec-18 18:10:23

Sounds more like dyslexia

SexNotJenga Wed 12-Dec-18 18:14:14

You'll be doing everyone a favour to get her assessed.

FoxyDog1234 Wed 12-Dec-18 18:17:48

It’s not dyslexia I know that for a fact as she’s in all top sets at school and gets good marks ( though revision helps as she never. Listens in lessons )

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FoxyDog1234 Wed 12-Dec-18 18:20:05

I understand this but I’m not sure whether it will come back as fine because I didn’t notice any behaviour such as talking in primary school years although when doing her homework she used to have breaks every 5 or 10 minutes literally

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semideponent Wed 12-Dec-18 18:22:26

ADHD still isn't that well understood in women and girls. I've certainly read that it develops later for them and often has a hormonal element. This is one of the reasons why it can be hard to spot - the diagnostic profile has been built around ADHD in males, who tend to show it much earlier.

I think my ADHD emerged during adolescence. Diagnosis is weird thing: it helps in many ways, but for some, it can be too defining. Living with undiagnosed and unmanaged ADHD can really eat away at a person's self-esteem - this is something that makes it doubly difficult for teenage girls who already face so many challenges to their sense of self-worth.

Gizzi Erskine has written about it, I think? It can help so much to read personal accounts. It puts a face on it, somehow.

RitaFairclough Wed 12-Dec-18 18:23:04

ADHD presents very differently in girls than in boys so it is under-diagnosed. I know someone who was diagnosed when he was 32 - there is no age limit. My son has it and two years after his diagnosis it is beginning to dawn on me that I probably have it too. I would ask for a referral and more investigations. My son is much younger - he was only 6 when he was diagnosed - but knowing there was a reason for his behaviour has helped him, helped us and helped school.

notpushyinterested Wed 12-Dec-18 18:25:06

This the millionth thread you have started asking this question. You've been asking at least since October. I don't know what you think people are going to say that is any different to what has been said in the other eleventy billion threads.

GreenTulips Wed 12-Dec-18 18:26:36

It’s not dyslexia I know that for a fact as she’s in all top sets at school

You know nothing about dyslexia

FoxyDog1234 Wed 12-Dec-18 18:27:57

I’m scared ok ! I’m looking for something that says she won’t have ADHD but I’m loosing hope 🙁 I love her and she’s a bright girl , I realise it’s selfish to hold back on a diagnosis but I don’t want anyone to treat her differently

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FoxyDog1234 Wed 12-Dec-18 18:28:17

Fair enough , tell me about it please x

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mumsiedarlingrevolta Wed 12-Dec-18 18:30:53

It’s not dyslexia I know that for a fact as she’s in all top sets at school

Both DD and DS are dyslexic and in all top sets. Also love to read. (another myth busted)
Clever children can be hard to diagnose because they figure out ways around problems...

Bamchicabaawaa Wed 12-Dec-18 18:34:26

Foxy - haven’t you asked this before? I’ve saif it under my other UNs, but you need to seek specialists not randoms online 🙄🤷‍♀️

Soontobe60 Wed 12-Dec-18 18:37:15

Green Tulips
If a child is in top sets for everything and hasn't already got a diagnosis of dyslexia, then they won't have dyslexia!

Starlight456 Wed 12-Dec-18 18:38:17

If you keep asking the question I suggest you refer . Even if your referral is accepted it will be a long wait . If she needs the diagnosis then it opens up the support she needs

TeenTimesTwo Wed 12-Dec-18 18:43:20

OP, the thing is, even if you are scared you need to go for an assessment.

If your DD has ADHD, then she has ADHD whether or not she has a formal assessment. But by getting an assessment, the school can wheel out their 'how to deal with ADHD students' policy which will be different from their 'how to deal with disruptive and lazy students' policy.

There may also be medication which helps calm your DD during school hours so she can concentrate and learn better.

You need to get the wheels in motion as assessments for things can take months.

FoxyDog1234 Wed 12-Dec-18 18:43:30

Thank you to all x

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FoxyDog1234 Wed 12-Dec-18 18:44:11

Ok thanks , would you go private or via cahms?

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SexNotJenga Wed 12-Dec-18 18:44:50

If she does have ADHD then you do want people to treat her differently: you want them to understand that she will find certain things difficult and will need and deserve support with them. You will want her teachers at school and maybe at university to understand how to support her. You won't want them to tell her off for things she can't help. You will want a variety of institutions - and employers - to understand that they have a legal duty to make reasonable adjustments to level the playing field.

The sooner support is put in place the better it works. Take her to the GP. And if she doesn't have ADHD/ADD or any other such condition, it's important to know that too.

SexNotJenga Wed 12-Dec-18 18:47:11

Camhs diagnosis will take longer but carry more weight. Get on the waiting list.

FoxyDog1234 Wed 12-Dec-18 19:16:53

Ok thanks

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GreenTulips Wed 12-Dec-18 23:39:24

Clever dyslexics can hide their ability up to a point - for example they work out how to circumvent a problem and looks like they are managing until it all goes pop.

They are likely to have reading writing and spelling difficulties - but not always noticeable until they can't manage any longer

Some have short term memory issues - so forgetful and can't follow instructions - whilst they try to remember instruction one - they've forgotten instruction 4
They are or appear disorganized because they can't remember - some will be efficient at writing things in a diary or organized folders so appear super organized - they aren't they just found a way round

Because it all gets too much they can suddenly start to play up in class because they can't physically fit anymore information and hold on to it - so no longer coping

Look up 37 signs of dyslexia

A lot of dyslexics aren't diagnosed until university age

GreenTulips Wed 12-Dec-18 23:40:07

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