Help please - Year 7(5 Posts)
In the few months since DS has been at secondary there has been one thing after another. As an LP with little support, it's becoming a bit much.
Since starting at the school he's lost quite a few items (whole school bag, PE kit, bus passes etc) and was punched and kicked in the playground himself last week by a boy (one I have concerns about) that he knew from primary school (one he claims is his very good friend) and was hurt badly.
My main concerns however are lying and secrecy. The school phoned to say DS has being truanting a particular subject lesson. This is not the child I knew - his record up until now has been exemplary. The school is such a massive building he goes unnoticed. I am going to find out why this particular lesson but it's upsetting that he has been coming home acting like he's been doing he's meant to (which I know may sound very naive).
The other issue is DS getting home late (up to half an hour late) despite being given more than enough time. I've begun banning his phone for short periods - but that doesn't tell me where he's been. I will add his Oyster to my account so I'll be able to see where he is getting buses to after school but that won't tell me exactly where he's been.
We have generally had a very happy family life and always got on so well. Being able to trust him is important to me.
Have you talked to him about why he isn't going to that particular subject? There must be a reason. Did the school have any ideas why it was happening?
Loads of kids loose stuff when they start secondary. They aren't used to looking after their own things or to moving round the school with stuff. Label the hell out of everything and tell him not to loose anything again.
Talk to the school about him being punched and kicked in the playground.
Is the half an hour late that big a deal. My dd is often late either because of the buses or because she was talking to her friends after school. Does he let you know?
My biggest concern would be bullying.
- are people taking his belongings?
- is he missing a particular lesson because he is sitting by a bully
- is he late home because he does not want to walk/ catch the bus/tube because bullies are there/on them at the same time
Definitely talk to the school, you need to know what action they are taking over the bullying and if they’ve discussed the truanting with him.
Agree with labelling everything, preferably lots of times.
is he late home because he does not want to walk/ catch the bus/tube because bullies are there/on them at the same time
First thing I thought of as well. Same with the missing items. I think you need to speak to him and school about it and stamp out the bullying.
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