She's starting in September and up until now I've been incredibly calm, but a couple of things have happened recently and it's just hit me how unsafe she may be.
I've noticed she's getting a lot of inappropriate looks and attention from men and older boys and this is when she's with me and her siblings. She's going to be such a target for sexual assault and harassment when she starts high school and there's Sod all I can do about it.
She has her moments but underneath she's a sweet kid, into cookery and science and stuff. I'm really worried about whats going to happen to her and how it's going to crush her spirit and individuality the way it did mine. When I put her name down for this school it was because the kids there seemed calm and not like typical teenagers, but somehow since she got her place it's all changed and they seem like hooligans, fighting, pushing each other into busy roads on the way home.
It also doesn't help that she's being really left out of her old group of friends recently. Not so much in school but they don't want to know her socially anymore.it breaks my heart that they all live round each other's houses and never invite her. And she doesn't talk about it really, I think she's trying not to let it get to her. I'm worried she's just not going to tell me things any more.
And wtf to do about house keys, mobile phones etc. I don't want her hanging about on the doorstep, but neither do I want to risk someone following her inside. I want her to be able to call me, but I don't want her getting drawn into sexting boys or any other godawful thing.
I know I sound crazy, but how can I sort all this crap out in time for September?
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Secondary education
Suddenly panicking about dd starting secondary school
user1487175389 · 26/05/2017 21:54
It suddenly hit me too as DD started high school that she was going into a more grown up environment and the age gap between Yr7 and Yr11 seemed a LOT bigger once September was just a few weeks away than when we looked around schools and they were all on their best behaviour.
I think some of how I felt was a little bit of a sense of loss. The little girl who once looked up at me and needed me for just about everything was now looking at me square in the eye and asking if she could go into town and to the beach after school. I could account for where the last 10+ years had gone and that made me think about how the fast the next 10 would go!
I'm happy to say that she's coming to the end of year 8 now and is settled, happy and doing well. And she still needs me but in different ways now but it's ok. Her friendship groups changed from Yr6 and she drifted a bit in Yr7 but is secure now.
DD has her own phone and I've had no problems with sexting or anything else inappropriate. I don't know any other parents that have either. All you can do is give them the tools with how to deal with unwanted situations and hope for the best. Make plans that you are both comfortable with yet allow her a little freedom so she builds her confidence and your trust.
It'll be ok 
A house key can be put onto a long piece of elastic and sewn into their school bag meaning they cannot lose it. We did this with Ds1 because we have those ABS locks which are expensive.
There will always be the possibility of incidents, you have to talk to them about what to do in those situations.
Ds1 knows that he needs to be aware of his surroundings and the people about when he approaches our house as he lets himself in. He knows to enter the house, and LOCK the door before turning the alarm off.
We have talked to him about his mobile phone and never to hand it over to anyone, even friends. Any messages can be shared in an instant so be careful of what you write down.
You teach them to navigate the world, one step at a time. Two children had sex in year 7, social services were involved and it gave us the opportunity to talk to Ds1 about how the boy was perceived to be cool and the girl? a slut. We talked about why. Also what would happen now if the girl was pregnant.
Just have an open door policy on talking. Ds1 asked me what anal lube was in year 7 because some child had brought his Mum's bottle in. 
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