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Sixth-form girl living alone

(524 Posts)
BoboChic Thu 16-Mar-17 10:13:44

Do you think that a private mixed sixth form should admit a new pupil who will be living alone in a small rented apartment during the week, returning home to her parents at the weekend?

finagler Thu 16-Mar-17 10:16:05

Yes.

BoboChic Thu 16-Mar-17 10:17:06

You wouldn't be worried that she was vulnerable?

blueskyinmarch Thu 16-Mar-17 10:17:27

Is there no boarding at the school?

I would think the school would not accept this as there would be no-one around to support her or take responsibility for her. The school certainly wouldn’t take on the duty of care for her out of school.

Could you find a local family, maybe people who also have a child at the school, she could live with?

blueskyinmarch Thu 16-Mar-17 10:18:25

What age is the girl in question?

CancellyMcChequeface Thu 16-Mar-17 10:18:52

I see no reason why not. What's the problem - was the apartment rented purely to get her within the catchment area for the school? (I have no experience with private schools so don't know if this can be an issue with some of them like it is for state.)

BoboChic Thu 16-Mar-17 10:19:30

Not my child. It's something that happened a while ago but is having repercussions!

finagler Thu 16-Mar-17 10:20:22

Oh OK. So it's happened and not gone well?

No then grin

BoboChic Thu 16-Mar-17 10:21:16

The issue is whether it was naive of the school to go along with this or not. As a parent I would never contemplate such a thing myself and I'm a bit surprised that the school didn't see the dangers. Said girl had a lot of freedom to invite boys round...

finagler Thu 16-Mar-17 10:22:22

Well yes it was naive in hindsight then.

PotteringAlong Thu 16-Mar-17 10:22:35

It's got nothing to do with the school though. She's over 16, she can be legally married, it's not their call to make.

BoboChic Thu 16-Mar-17 10:23:18

She was a minor.

ohdoadoodoo Thu 16-Mar-17 10:24:55

How could she have rented an apartment if she was a minor?

walruswhiskers Thu 16-Mar-17 10:25:41

Was it you, OP?

I can see many issues with this from the girl's point of view ; however I can also see benefits in terms of not missing out on finishing a school in which the person is settled etc. I wouldn't even countenance it for my DD1, Dd2 might handle it better. Clearly far from ideal in Amy circumstance though!

CancellyMcChequeface Thu 16-Mar-17 10:25:42

Fair enough. Living alone at 16/17 is more unusual than it used to be, but it happens - I wouldn't say it's the school's place to say that she couldn't. Up to the girl and her parents, really. It's unfortunate if there was a misjudgement on their part and she didn't cope well with it, but that doesn't mean that nobody her age could.

walruswhiskers Thu 16-Mar-17 10:26:57

Not sure how the school can be blamed though. It's a parental choice really. School could have expressed concerns at most (and probably didn't want to turn the fees down as private...)

BoboChic Thu 16-Mar-17 10:28:27

The parents rented the apartment. This is is something that happened at the school of some DC I know.

BoboChic Thu 16-Mar-17 10:29:47

The girl wasn't settled at the school - she moved there. And it wasn't a fee issue (highly oversubscribed school).

tiggytape Thu 16-Mar-17 10:30:37

A person aged 16-18 living alone would be relatively uncommon now but wasn't so rare even one generation back.
And even today I'm not sure it is something a school would veto in the sense of refusing to admit a pupil living independently from their parents (although I suspect they would be more on the ball about potential issues surrounding wellbeing).

HoldMeCloserTonyDanza Thu 16-Mar-17 10:30:46

I think this is a ridiculous and unfair state of affairs - minors dealing with the most stressful and important years of school need to be supported by their parents. There are so many sixth form boarding options, why didn't they make use of them?

I'm not British though and my parenting style with regard to teenagers and schoolwork is regarded as massively Tiger Mother/controlling by MN.

blueskyinmarch Thu 16-Mar-17 10:34:32

My very first thought was much too much freedom and potential for it all to go wrong. That was why I said an outright no in my first post. No one to take responsibility is a recipe for disaster.

halcyondays Thu 16-Mar-17 10:37:53

It doesn't have anything to do with the school, it's up to the girl and her parents.

Trifleorbust Thu 16-Mar-17 10:39:46

She can invite boys round if she wants.

AdamantEve Thu 16-Mar-17 10:40:01

I lived on my own at 16 and attended 6th Form with no issues. So don't think they were unreasonable to allow her to study there, not every 16 year old living alone will have problems so they surely can't generalise and just say no to all in that situation!

MattBerrysHair Thu 16-Mar-17 10:46:09

I lived alone and went to 6th form, in very different circumstances though. The school were really supportive. I don't think it's any different to the 16 year olds who stay at agricultural colleges during term time.

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