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Should I let my Y8 ds change schools?

(3 Posts)
sergeantmajor Wed 22-Feb-17 11:01:02

DS2 has become very unhappy at his school. He goes to a different school to all his primary school friends who he remains close to and sees all weekend. He is usually very sociable and popular, with a knack of making friends wherever he goes.

But he has never found kids he likes at his secondary school. And now he is desperately unhappy. (He says there is no bullying, just no friends).

It's hard to tell how much is teenage hormones, as he is in a very emotional phase, and how much is just friendship groups changing which would sort itself out in a month or two.

I'd prefer him to stay at his current school, as it achieves better academic results than his friends' school and has a more wholesome bunch of kids, in general, with much fewer issues around drugs etc.

Even assuming that we could get him a place at his friends' school, do you think it's right to move him, or to sit tight in the hope of things getting better?

MusicToMyEars800 Wed 22-Feb-17 11:05:30

I would let him move, I was unhappy in 2 of my schools as a child and the last school I moved to wasn't academically great nor did it have a shiny ofsted report, but I was happiest at that school than all the others and I still did well with school work and achieved good grades. Moving schools was the best thing for me as I was very unhappy and every morning my mum had a big struggle getting me to school because of it, when I moved I loved going to school.

bojorojo Wed 22-Feb-17 11:12:02

Let him move. The fact he has kept his previous friends means he has not had to bother too much at this school. I don't expect the other boys are matching his expectations!

I would add a few strings. For example keeping up with work, doing your best etc. If the results are not as good, what about the progress figures? These mean more really. Is the new school getting good progress for its students in his category - high, medium or low achiever. Does it offer the subjects he wants? How are they tackling any poor behaviour? Never assume your child will make friends with unwholesome types. Most children avoid them like the plague! If you trust his current friends and they are influences for good, then let him go. Better to do it ASAP.

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