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Time off for periods

(52 Posts)
Emochild Fri 20-Jan-17 21:54:01

Dd is having a horrendous time -she floods through pads and tampons in under an hour

We have been to the gp and told that because she's not in a regular cycle then she can't go on the pill

She's tried another medication to reduce her flow -didn't work

This morning she flooded before the end of her first lesson -ended up sitting on her coat to protect the chair so she wouldn't leave an obvious mark

She had pads and tampons with her but her trousers were soaked to mid thigh

School didn't ring me to let me know

She went to student services, told them she had leaked (but probably not to what extent because she was mortified) their response was to offer her a fresh pad with a charge of 50p

It's a cashless school, she didn't have 50p -but she had supplies anyway

What she needed was a wash and a change of clothes

Her year have been told in a pshce lesson that periods are no reason to miss school and they need to deal with it

I know this isn't AIBU but WIBU to keep her at home for the first couple of days of her next period?

The last 2 have been in school holidays, she's flooded through to the sofa and her bed both times but this is the first time she's had to deal with it at school

Sleeperandthespindle Fri 20-Jan-17 21:56:22

She should definitely stay at home if she wants to (teacher here). Write a note referring to 'gynaecological problems'.

greathat Fri 20-Jan-17 21:59:28

Surely if she's losing blood that fast her health is at real risk. has the GP suggested an alternative. She can't go to school like that, but missing lots of time isn't going to be good sad

JennyOnAPlate Fri 20-Jan-17 22:00:02

take her back to the doctor op. They need to investigate the reason for her heavy periods; it isn't normal to bleed like that and she doesn't have to put up with it.

Thecontentedcat Fri 20-Jan-17 22:05:37

It can be normal to bleed that when your cycle is still settling down, but she is likely to have anaemia, and you should get a gynaecologist referral anyway to rule anything more concerning out.

Laughingcamel Fri 20-Jan-17 22:07:57

I feel that they're our children and we make our own decisions regarding their wellbeing. If you feel she needs to be et home, keep her home. It's not the school's decision.

LunaLoveg00d Fri 20-Jan-17 22:08:35

Back to the GP and demand a gynae referral. She needs to investigate the cause of this.

Emochild Fri 20-Jan-17 22:10:16

Gp has said heavy periods are common for the first year or so so they would only investigate if she was showing physical symptoms of illness

She had her first period in august, next one in October (which is when we went to the gp) and now this one

TammySwansonxx Fri 20-Jan-17 22:14:02

The amount of fluid you're describing is nit a "heavy period"

Enough blood loss to soak through a towel and make her trousers wet to mid thigh, in an hour? Yours supposed to lose a small glass's worth over the whole period.

Fuck that

And the world wants us to believe that women's biology is a fucking social construct and that being a woman is a feeling or idea? Fuck that shit.

Nicketynac Fri 20-Jan-17 22:22:23

I had heavy periods as a teenager but nothing like you are describing. I would take her back to GP (a different one if possible) and I would definitely keep her off school at the start of her next period. She must be feeling so self-conscious.

Emochild Fri 20-Jan-17 22:23:42

She loses a ridiculous amount -dd actually describes it as having 3 months of periods simultaneously

She's convinced she'll get into trouble though if I let her stay off she probably would knowing her school

Heirhelp Fri 20-Jan-17 22:26:04

Normally losing that much blood is cause to seek immediate medical help. I would be pushing for a referral as well as iron test.

Normally time off due to periods is not needed but this is not normal.

Merlin40 Fri 20-Jan-17 22:31:41

Definitely back to GP.

If she isn't in pain, can you send her in with spare trousers/pads/pack of baby wipes that she can keep in her bag/ locker? Or if she leaks really bad, can she pop home and wash/change then go back? I know that depends on how close you are etc. I'd worry long term if she had to miss a few days every month.

Keepingupwiththejonesys Fri 20-Jan-17 22:35:07

This isn't normal and tour doctor is fobbing you off. I was put on the pill age 14 due to very heavy periods, was going through a tampon and pad in under two hours. What you're describing is extremely heavy and she needs to see.someone willing to help!

MrsBlennerhassett Fri 20-Jan-17 22:35:47

YANBU that is not a normal period though. If you are keeping her off school it snot because of a period its because of problems associated with her period as other people have said. It is a health issue so i think perfectly legitimate to keep her off school as it would be for pain from endometriosis or cysts etc

Emochild Fri 20-Jan-17 22:37:24

We live a 10 minute walk from school so could easily be home and back in less than a lesson but that's not allowed

No lockers, they have to carry all their stuff around all day -plus there is nowhere private to change trousers -they have those stupid short toilet doors as an anti bullying measure

reikizen Fri 20-Jan-17 22:39:18

I also think she needs to go back to the gp, that amount of blood loss must be terrifying for her! Do your research about options for treatment before you go and don't worry about keeping her off school.

MrsBlennerhassett Fri 20-Jan-17 22:40:07

well i definately keep her off for a few days each month until the problem is sorted then. As long as she is not behind at school or anything? I think the humilation of having to walk round soaked in blood is not worth a perfect attendance record. Id personally never put my child through that i think it sounds traumatic.

Bellabelloo Fri 20-Jan-17 22:40:40

Bless her. Mine were like that at school. I would use 2 pads and secure them with reams and reams of toilet paper and have to change it all after every lesson. Really painful too. I couldn't talk to my mum about periods though so it's great she can talk to you. Mine were better when I went on the pill. So I don't really have any pearls of wisdom. How many days off would she need per cycle?

LegoCaltrops Fri 20-Jan-17 22:45:07

Can you make a doctor's appointment for next time her period is due. If she is flooding (at home), save her trousers in a plastic bag & take them with you. Grim but maybe it will get them to realise your DD is not having a normal level of blood loss. Or perhaps take a photo if you can't get an appointment at the correct time of the month? (Photo may not show the problem as clearly though.)

Natsku Fri 20-Jan-17 22:45:15

I would keep her home. I remember the hell of heavy periods in school and mine where light compared to what you describe. She should not have to suffer the embarrassment and discomfort of having soaked bloody trousers in class.

wannabestressfree Fri 20-Jan-17 22:45:49

I have periods like that and did at her age. She needs to go back to the dr and ask for noristhistolone and transemic acid to slow the flow or stop it (I have spelt the first one wrong) and a referral.
If it's any consolation it settled by 17 but restarted again after I had my children. I see gynie regularly.
No periods are not an excuse to have time off in my opinion but this is not normal. It needs sorting.

PiafPilaf Fri 20-Jan-17 22:49:09

Another teacher here, and I'd keep her off and go to another GP for a second opinion. She's not going to be learning much if she's that u happy and stressed anyway. She can do the work at home until you get it sorted.

DoctorBeat Fri 20-Jan-17 22:49:22

I'm sorry but the dr that told you she can't go on the pill until she has a regular cycle is talking pure bullshit. And I speak as a doctor who has just finished a family planning job and is now working in O&G. I suggest she goes to her local family planning clinic (book in to see a doctor rather than going to a nurse led walk-in, if they offer this) and finds the right hormonal contraceptive for her that can reduce her bleeding. She can keep going back as many times as she needs until the problem is sorted. There is no need for someone to be bleeding like that and she really shouldn't be missing school. At her age it is highly unlikely there is anything sinister underlying. Just problematic periods which are common but a complete pain and just not necessary in this day and age.

GinIsIn Fri 20-Jan-17 22:51:43

As PPs have said, that's not a heavy period, that's serious blood loss! Anything flooding more than a pad an hour really does need an urgent gynae referral - I would go back to the GP ASAP, or preferably to a different one.

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