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My son MUST have HAIR CUT for secondary school!

(188 Posts)
strewthy13 Thu 25-Aug-16 11:38:16

We have been informed that we MUST get our sons hair cut before he goes up to secondary school this year. If we don't the school will refuse to let him attend. We have written to the school and quoted the sexual discrimination act etc but they will not budge. The school rules say hair no longer than the collar and will not be tolerated. Hair off or him off. We are really not happy about this and needless to say our son is devastated to say the least. Our child has had long blonde hair since he started to walk...thoughts and ideas would be very much appreciated. If anyone has had the same experience that would be helpful too!

GeneralBobbit Thu 25-Aug-16 11:39:30

He has to put it up in a ponytail and not have it loose ?

GeneralBobbit Thu 25-Aug-16 11:40:34

Or he could get it cut?

Or go to a different school?

Or you could home educate?

Lots of choices

dickiedavisthunderthighs Thu 25-Aug-16 11:42:02

It's probably a safety thing. Can't he just put it in a ponytail?

TealGiraffe Thu 25-Aug-16 11:43:12

Can he wear it tied up? Or must it be cut?

Ultimately if you want him in that school he has to follow the rules. If you frame it as a positive and look at hairstyles online etc he may be more open to it? Is he picking up on your unhappiness over the whole thing?

JenLindley Thu 25-Aug-16 11:43:12

Have they given the option of tying it up so its above his collar or are they just saying it has to go altogether?

Pendu Thu 25-Aug-16 11:44:05

Don't back down. There isn't a good reason for this. What about Sikh boys? Transgender? Why can't boys have long hair ?? Move schools of needs be, but don't back down. Contact your mp.

curlywillow Thu 25-Aug-16 11:45:27

tie it back. They'll probably drop it.

KingJoffreyLikesJaffaCakes Thu 25-Aug-16 11:46:20

Ignore it. They can't discriminate like that.

DS had really long hair until recently.

What about a Jon Snow style man bun??

confusionis Thu 25-Aug-16 11:46:37

We live in a world where its ok for armed police to undress a woman on a public beach because the law says she is wearing too many clothes. And you are worried about a little hair cut?

PrincessHairyMclary Thu 25-Aug-16 11:48:37

dickie it can't be a safety thing if girls can have long hair there. If the rule is the same for the girls fair enough but I bet it's not.

angeldiver Thu 25-Aug-16 11:49:12

Choose a different school with different rules.
Did you not realise when you chose that school that they have certain uniform/appearance rules?

JenLindley Thu 25-Aug-16 11:49:16

Oh yawn confusion
It's perfectly fine to have personal issues that affect only you whilst there is worse stuff going on in the world. Bigger shit doesn't mean the smaller stuff isn't still a problem.

JenLindley Thu 25-Aug-16 11:50:26

Is it an all boys' school? With no Sikh's?

RhuBarbarella Thu 25-Aug-16 11:54:39

Contact Board of Trustees or whoever tops the persons that wrote the letter. It is an absurd rule and your son should not be made to change his hair in order to attend school. Long hair is acceptable for girls, it should be the same for boys.

OddBoots Thu 25-Aug-16 11:54:41

I'd be surprised it they didn't let him have it in a ponytail, plait or bun (depending how long it is) to keep it above the collar.

JackandDiane Thu 25-Aug-16 11:55:39

you knew the deal when you signed up
get it cut

MumiTravels Thu 25-Aug-16 11:56:07

That's ridiculous.

I could see why they would have a hair tied back rule especially for certain lessons but not a length rule.

It should be the same for boys as girls.

Man buns have come into fashion now.

JackandDiane Thu 25-Aug-16 11:59:12

if the school is traditional on this issue you might find that this is the beginning of a long acrimonious relationship that will impact on your son
Is it a trad boys grammar school kind of thing?

morethanyoubargainfor Thu 25-Aug-16 12:01:38

My son was told the same 3 years ago, that he had to have it cut. We still haven't managed to go to the barbers! They have girls with waist length hair who tie it up (sometimes grr) so he just wears his tied up. They can't discriminate like that. What is the schools policy on girls with long hair? He should be allowed to decide how he has his hair, after all how is long hair going to affect his ability to learn.

Ivydalegirl Thu 25-Aug-16 12:03:41

Going to school is about education, part of that is learning to follow the rules. Even ones we don't like. Maybe you should home educate.

Missgraeme Thu 25-Aug-16 12:04:51

What if he was trans gender? Would they be able to keep the rule if he was pre op for example? Get him to turn up with big bunches with ribbons!

Oliversmumsarmy Thu 25-Aug-16 12:10:08

Ds has long hair. Atm he attends an on line school/home ed. Where the length of his hair has been an issue with schools in the past he has been referred to the girls rules on long hair that it must be tied back. Only one HM has ever said he needed to cut it. He agreed to it reluctantly but it became like a barrier between him and the school. He left after a year for other reasons and it took him 2 years before he summoned the confidence to go back into school environment.

Hair for some is linked to their confidence.

bluebeck Thu 25-Aug-16 12:10:46

Did you not know the rules when you chose the school? Or have they only recently imposed it?

Is there another school he could go to or will you have to home educate? It seems an extreme reaction given that he will probably want to cut it soon anyway. I would just get him to tie it up properly or cut it.

Oliversmumsarmy Thu 25-Aug-16 12:12:15

Ivydale rules are there to be challenged not blindly followed

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